Chapter 225: Excuses

“Then, how many times did you die this time?”

“W-well, you see...”

Had they heard the whole story from Unknown?

Every one of them was glaring at me.

With nothing else to say, I could only shrink back.

As I hesitated to speak, their forceful questioning pressed down heavily on my shoulders.

“Viktor, answer me.”

“Well...”

“Will you no longer heed even your liege lord’s words? Or have you decided you will no longer serve me?”

“No. Your Highness is the one I will serve all my life. You know my loyalty, so how can you say such a thing...?”

“I do not know. The loyalty, life, and service Viktor speaks of... I know nothing of them.”

“Your Highness...”

“There were similar incidents before. During Blue Night, did you not sacrifice yourself against the Blue Knight? In the chief inspector’s Deep World, you died more than three hundred times. Without the slightest hesitation. As though it were only natural.”

Anger.

And sorrow deeper than that.

“Did I not scold you harshly then as well? Did I not ask you to cherish your own body? To think, even a little, about how those around you feel when they see you like that? I begged you. I spoke to you in tears. Your liege lord went so far as to beg her vassal.”

“...”

“Have you kept that promise?”

“Your Highness, I...”

It had been a long time since I had seen Her Highness this angry.

And a long time since I had seen her this sad.

I had no choice but to bite down hard on my lip.

“Answer me. How many times did you throw your life away this time?”

“...”

“How many times did you die?”

“W-well, around a hundred...”

“If you continue to lie to me at a time like this, then we truly are finished.”

“...Four hundred. To be exact, 492 times.”

Perhaps the number was beyond anything she had imagined.

Her red eyes widened blankly.

Then her brow furrowed again.

A line of tears ran down her fair cheek.

“Explain yourself.”

“I am sorry.”

“Did I not tell you to explain yourself?”

“I am sorry.”

Making excuses here would only have the opposite effect.

Saying it could not be helped, saying I had to save Unknown, none of that would persuade her.

I had already broken my promise.

The promise not to treat myself so carelessly.

So for now, asking forgiveness rather than making excuses was the right thing to do.

“Are you truly sorry?”

“I deeply regret it.”

“Then tell me what exactly you are so sorry for.”

“I did not treat myself with care. And I did not discuss what I had to do with everyone.”

“I am even angrier because you know that. Then, if you returned to that moment, would you make a different choice?”

“...”

“I told you to answer truthfully.”

“...I would not. Certainly not.”

“Hah.”

She wore the expression of someone who had expected as much.

Though she was crying, the girl did not relinquish her imposing air.

It felt like a punishment for me, and perhaps a punishment for herself as well.

“Tell me. How did you die?”

“Well, I died differently each time...”

“...”

Her Highness was briefly left speechless.

As though swallowing back tears, she drew several long, deep breaths.

Her red eyes were clear and watery.

“Then tell me how you died most often.”

“Your Highness...”

“Tell me.”

“...My neck. My neck was stabbed.”

“I see.”

Shhhk.

Her Highness suddenly reached into the air.

Dark crimson ripples writhed around her pale fingertips.

Then a dagger formed in her grasp.

“Your Highness...?”

The girl strode toward me.

She grabbed my arm, then pressed the dark crimson dagger into my hand.

“Stab me.”

Her hand pulled mine roughly.

Her Highness forced the dagger I held against her neck.

After the cold sensation, I saw the blade about to touch her pale skin.

Those red eyes held only the boy before her.

“Your Highness? What are you...?”

“Stab me.”

“Please let go! Why are you doing this...?!”

“I told you to stab me. Just as Viktor suffered there.”

Her grip tightened around my wrist.

The dagger point wavered, ready to wound that noble neck at any moment.

I tensed and held firm, then parried her hand away and stepped back.

“Ugh...”

Thankfully, I narrowly avoided letting the blade touch her.

I suddenly lost my temper and raised my voice.

“What are you doing?! You could have been hurt!”

“Were you frightened?”

“What would you have done if I had not knocked it away?! If you had really been stabbed...!”

“When your own body was destroyed, you did not even furrow your brow once. Yet you cannot stand to watch someone else be hurt?”

“Your Highness! That is completely different...!”

“Be silent! I am speaking, am I not?!”

“...”

The tension between us was sharp.

I calmed myself down.

“Do you understand a little now? My feelings? The feelings of those who have no choice but to watch Viktor become a wreck again and again?”

“But that...”

“Do not tell me it could not be helped. Could it truly not be helped? Was there truly no other way, so you chose that path? We could at least have entered the Deep World together. It would have been better for seven people to endure it than for one person to endure it alone.”

“No. I could not expose everyone to danger like that...”

“You could not expose us to danger? And was Viktor safe?”

“...”

“You died nearly five hundred times in there, and you call that an excuse?”

I wanted to argue, but I had nothing to say.

I clenched my fists.

I could feel everyone’s piercing gazes.

Their eyes had all reddened as they quietly listened.

“Viktor.”

“...”

Reason and logic had run dry.

Beyond them, I spilled out the sincerity that remained like thick mud.

“How could I watch that...? How could I bear to see Your Highness, to see everyone else being tortured?”

“You could not. Who in this world would gladly watch someone they love suffer?”

My pitiful voice was smothered by an undeniable truth.

Her Highness looked up at me.

A lukewarm hand rested on my cheek.

Another person’s warmth spread across my burn scar.

“I feel the same. The others likely feel the same as well.”

“...”

“We think it would be better for us to be hurt than for Viktor to be hurt.”

“...”

One corner of my heart ached.

Her hand against my cheek was warm, her eyes met mine as she cried, she was kind even while angry, I had missed that, and I was sad again. I had to turn over those tangled feelings. Only after dwelling on them all did I finally speak.

“...I am sorry.”

The words I said once again.

They were the exact same sentence, but more sincere than they had been a few minutes ago.

That was why I could not bring myself to look up and meet everyone’s eyes.

Her Highness gently lifted my lowered head.

“Viktor.”

“...Yes, Your Highness.”

Her touch was soft.

Our faces were close enough for our breaths to touch.

Her scent at the bridge of my nose was intoxicating, like cool lilies.

“Remember this.”

Her pale red lips whispered firmly.

The warmth in her palm was as quiet as it was full.

“If Viktor is hurt, I too will be hurt. If Viktor dies, I too will follow him in death.”

“...”

“So do not be hurt. Do not die. Do not give me the world, then suddenly try to disappear.”

“...I will try. I truly will.”

“Do not merely try. You must do it properly.”

“Yes.”

My answer was small, yet heavy.

Her Highness pressed my cheek again and again.

“I spoke on behalf of everyone. If I hurt your feelings or made you feel slighted, I hope you will forgive me.”

“No. I think I needed to hear that.”

Smack.

As I shook my head, a soft sensation touched my lips.

Warm, damp skin touched them, then pulled away.

I blinked in blank surprise.

“I was worried you might stubbornly dig in your heels, but I am glad you said that.”

At some point, she had stopped crying and was hiding her reddened eyes.

For no reason, heat rose to my face.

I answered with some embarrassment.

“Your Highness... Um, everyone is watching...”

“So what? We are all going to be family.”

“No, it is not that...”

“Once we hold a wedding, will we not see far more of each other?”

Her Highness whispered only into my ear so the others could not hear.

I could only be stunned by those bold words.

The funny thing was that Her Highness, who had said them, looked as though her face might burst.

‘Even though she is not used to saying things like that...’

If she was embarrassed, she did not have to say it. It seemed she was pushing herself too hard to lighten the mood.

As if saying to hell with it, Her Highness pressed her lips to mine once more.

Smooch.

This time, she did not pull away for a long while.

So I had no choice but to hold her back.

* * *

A few minutes later.

After that kiss, which had felt like eternity, finally ended.

“What was that just now?”

“...”

“You confidently said you would be the one to scold him, then suddenly got swept up in the mood and started making out with him.”

“Eek...”

“Did you mean you would scold him in bed?”

“Th-th-that is not what I meant...”

Her Highness was teased mercilessly.

===

The maid princess.

I will upload the rest of the friends tomorrow.