Chapter 82 Aun'Shi (Bonus)

“You’re Aun’Shi?”

Vane looked at the blue-skinned T’au standing before him, his eyes filled with genuine curiosity.

If his memory served him right, he was a martial arts master so skilled he had actually survived the bloody gladiatorial arenas of the Dark Aeldari.

“Indeed, human. I thank you for rescuing me. May the glory of the Greater Good shine upon you,” Aun’Shi replied evenly.

“I don’t really like the Greater Good. I prefer the Imperial Truth. I highly suggest you all convert to the Imperial Truth right now.” Vane casually conversed with the Ethereal, clearly amused.

Sure, the original Imperial Truth was completely eradicated ten thousand years ago, but that’s fine. I’ll just bring it back. And if anyone refuses to believe in the Imperial Truth… well, I know a little bit of martial arts myself.

Violence can’t solve every problem, but it can absolutely solve the people causing the problems.

“Out of the absolute goodness of my heart, I will permit the T’au Empire to unconditionally surrender to the Imperium of Man and become a vassal state,” Vane offered magnanimously. “You may carry this message back to your people. As long as the T’au Empire submits and becomes a vassal, we can avoid a full-scale war and minimize casualties.”

“No. Only the Greater Good can truly save this galaxy,” Aun’Shi flatly rejected Vane’s ‘generous’ offer.

“I never show mercy to my enemies,” Vane grinned, his teeth bared in a shark-like smile. “The T’au Empire will either become a vassal of humanity, or it will become our enemy.”

A Fire Caste warrior standing beside Aun’Shi couldn’t tolerate the disrespect any longer. Speaking in heavily accented Low Gothic, he shot back, “The Greater Good is the absolute future of this galaxy. I acknowledge that your Imperium of Man possesses immense military might, but I do not believe you have a future.”

“Your decline is inevitable and predestined. The T’au Empire will rise like a newborn sun, bringing true hope to this dark, stagnant galaxy.”

Vane genuinely wondered if he had misheard the alien, or if this Fire Warrior had suffered severe brain damage from taking too many hits to the head in the gladiatorial arenas.

Because the T’au Empire heavily utilized AI and rapid technological iteration, their tech-base looked significantly more advanced than the Imperium’s regressive, superstitious technology. Consequently, the T’au had always looked down on the Imperium, viewing it as a rotting, backwards, decaying corpse of an empire. They firmly believed it was their absolute destiny to replace humanity as the new masters of the galaxy.

But right now, an overwhelming Imperial armada had just completely annihilated Commorragh and seized control of the Webway, and these blue smurfs were still this arrogant?!

Vane honestly didn’t know if he should praise their courage or laugh at their unfathomable ignorance.

With control of the Webway, the Imperium would completely bypass the fatal dangers of Warp travel. They could instantly and efficiently integrate the resources and information of a million scattered worlds. Even their stagnant technology would experience a massive renaissance due to the rapid, safe exchange of knowledge across the galaxy.

How could the T’au—a race that hadn’t even scratched the surface of the Warp—possibly compare to an Imperium on the verge of a massive, golden-age resurgence?

Right then, a system prompt popped up in Vane’s vision.

[New Main Quest Activated: Defeat the T’au Empire in their attempt to challenge the Imperium’s galactic supremacy.]

[Reward: 10% Total Conquest Progression. Unlocked Title: ‘Lifelong Enemy of the T’au’.]

Seeing the quest prompt, Vane couldn’t help but curse internally. What the hell kind of quest title is that?! Do you really think so little of me?!

I am the literal Player of the Minecraft universe! Are you telling me my entire existence is only worth a single Lunar-class cruiser to them?!

Wait, hold on, my bad. Not just a Lunar-class cruiser. The T’au Empire currently fields Custodian-class battleships. A ‘Lifelong Enemy’ should at least be worth a battleship.

(TL/N: The author is referencing a classic Warhammer 40k meme about the T’au Empire’s naivety. Because the T’au are a small, young empire, they famously overestimate threats, often mistaking a single, standard Imperial spaceship for an “ultimate, endgame boss.” When Vane—a god-level being who just bullied a Chaos god—receives the title “Lifelong Enemy of the T’au,” his gamer ego is deeply insulted. Being the T’au’s “ultimate enemy” is a hilariously low bar, making Vane feel like the system is equating his multiversal power to a generic mid-tier spaceship.)

“You know absolutely nothing about the reality of this galaxy,” Vane shook his head, looking down at the T’au. “But I choose to forgive your profound ignorance and stupidity. I’ll let you return to the T’au Empire.”

“After all, forcing you to helplessly watch as your precious T’au Empire is utterly systematically annihilated will undoubtedly be a far crueler punishment than simply killing you here.”

Aun’Shi suppressed his rising anger and retorted, enunciating every word carefully. “The T’au Empire will never be destroyed. We will eventually march toward an incredibly glorious future, guided by the light of the Greater Good.”

“Whatever helps you sleep at night, buddy. You’ll see the ending soon enough anyway.” Vane couldn’t be bothered to argue with a wall. He hailed Yvraine of the Ynnari and ordered her to escort the T’au delegation back to realspace.

Once he went to Terra, dragged the Master of Mankind off the Golden Throne, and resurrected Ferrus Manus, he’d finally get around to dealing with the T’au Empire. He guaranteed he would beat these blue smurfs so badly they’d be crying for their mothers and begging on their knees to surrender. He’d love to see if their mouths were still this stubborn then.

Honestly, Vane always felt there was something inherently suspicious about the T’au Empire. Their technology advanced way too rapidly, yet their souls barely registered a footprint in the Warp. It felt entirely artificially engineered, as if they were specifically chosen and elevated by some hidden cosmic entity.

But he didn’t care enough to unravel whatever convoluted conspiracy was behind it. Annihilating them all was the easiest, most foolproof solution.

T’au Goddess of the Greater Good… hehehe… you wouldn’t want the T’au race to be exterminated, would you?

“I express my genuine gratitude for your mercy. Compared to the fanatical zealots of your species, you are surprisingly rational,” Aun’Shi bowed respectfully before turning to leave. “I sincerely hope that one day, we can forge a treaty of peace and end the conflict between our two races.”

“The Greater Good treats every race with equality. I hope you will deeply consider this and persuade the stubborn elements of your Imperium to join the T’au Empire, so we may build a better galaxy together.”

Seeing the Ethereal remain so utterly, blindly arrogant, Vane took a deep breath, forcing down his absolute exasperation.

“I’ve decided. When I have some free time, I’m going to personally dive into the Warp, absolutely ruin your Goddess of the Greater Good, and drag out the horrifying truth of this galaxy.”

“I genuinely hope that when you finally witness the cruel, unfiltered reality of this universe, you can still maintain this adorable confidence of yours, instead of instantly degenerating into something far more pathetic than humanity.”

“Yvraine, throw them out of the Webway. Just dump them on whatever random planet has a T’au presence.”

Yvraine and her Ynnari nodded and quickly escorted Aun’Shi and the T’au delegation away.