223 Trying
He laid down behind her, bringing his hand to rest on her hip while nuzzling into her hair, inhaling her scent. It filled him with a sense of home, comfort, and warmth.
Ashleigh was surprised but not startled by his presence.
He had become like another part of herself. His touch was an extension of her own hand.
“Caleb…” she whispered softly.
He responded by nuzzling deeper into her hair and lightly squeezing her hip.
“Hi,” he whispered.
Ashleigh closed her eyes and clenched her jaw, feeling the surge of emotions fighting for dominance. Relief, joy, love, longing, all blending together in a mess of tears that made their escape with a sob she could not hold back.
“I miss you so much,” she cried out.
Caleb slipped his hand down to wrap around her waist. He pulled her into the curve of his body and held her. Enveloping her in his warmth.
“I’m right here,” he whispered. Kissing her hair softly. “Always.”
Safe in his arms, his presence. Ashleigh let the tears fall. Caleb continued to hold her as she cried. He whispered sweetly to her that it was alright. Reminding her that he loved her, he missed her.
Ashleigh finally felt the waves of emotions settling down into something more manageable. She turned over to face him.
Her breath hitched when she saw his grey eyes looking back at her. Even knowing he was there, she wasn’t prepared to actually see him.
Ashleigh wrapped her arms around him tightly and hugged him.
Caleb chuckled..
“It’s me,” he said softly.
She pulled back, looking at him carefully, touching his face tenderly. It felt warm, smooth, and genuine. But she knew this was only in her mind.
“It’s part of you,” she said.
Caleb nodded.
“What about the suppression?” she asked, still tenderly stroking his face.
He leaned into her hand, enjoying her touch.
“When Galen told me you were in the hospital, I flushed my system of the suppressant,” he replied. “I needed to know you were okay.”
Ashleigh smiled and then tilted her head.
“What about you?” she said. “Galen mentioned there might be something wrong.”
Caleb sighed.
“I’m fine,” he said.
‘You keep things from each other, by choice… that’s lying.’
Axel’s words echoed in Caleb’s mind. He felt a grip in his chest that forced him to swallow.
“Caleb?” Ashleigh called to him, feeling how he had tensed up and pulled away.
He looked into her hazel eyes. Axel had said she didn’t trust Caleb, but all he saw looking back at him was trust. Complete trust.
‘…everything she does, is for you…’
Caleb knew right then that she would follow him. If he told her again that he was fine, she would accept it, and in return, she would tell him that she was okay.
“Ashleigh,” he called to her.
She smiled at him.
“I love you,” he said.
“I love you too.”
“I’m not ok,” he smiled.
A look of concern passed over her eyes.
“I will be,” he said quickly. “But right now, I’m in a hospital.”
“What happened?” she asked, pulling back and looking over his body.
“You won’t see any injuries here,” Caleb said. “Our time together right now is entirely in our minds. I show you the me I want you to see.”
“Oh…” Ashleigh said softly, looking down at herself. She was in a hospital gown, in a hospital bed. She touched her face, knowing it was covered in bruises.
“It wasn’t fair of me, was it?” he asked, touching her cheek. “I came to you when I knew you were vulnerable. But I hid because I didn’t want you to worry.”
Ashleigh looked back at him.
“How bad is it?” she asked.
Caleb swallowed.
“It’s going to take a couple of days before I am healed enough to go anywhere.”
“Caleb…” she said in a pained whisper.
“I promise, Ashleigh, I am ok,” he said. “I can’t go into it yet, but I needed to do this.”
Ashleigh swallowed down her fears and concerns and nodded her head.
“Ok, as long as you will be alright.”
“I will,” he smiled, touching a loose strand of her hair.
Ashleigh laid back against his arm. Pressing her forehead to his shoulder.
“What about you?” he asked hesitantly. “Are you alright?”
She was quiet for a moment; she took a deep breath.
“Today was a lot,” she sighed. “I took a beating; my shoulder is pretty banged up. But mostly, I just feel kind of worn down.”
He was worried about her. He hated knowing she was having a hard time, especially when he wasn’t there to comfort her himself.
“I think I realized something today,” Ashleigh continued.
“What’s that?” he asked.
“I don’t know how to rely on others,” she said. “I can work in a team and lead a war party. But I don’t know how to ask for help or trust someone else to help me when I need it.”
Caleb hugged her a little tighter.
“Except for you,” she said. “I know you’ll be there when I need you.”
“You trust me?” Caleb asked.
“Is that a surprise?” Ashleigh laughed.
Caleb paused, once again thinking of what Axel had said.
“A little,” he said.
Ashleigh pulled away to look at him, shocked by his words.
She stared into his eyes, preparing to deny that she didn’t trust him, to tell him how important he was to her.
But the look in his eye, she felt a tug in her heart. A heavy pull on the innermost, darkest chord within her emotional self. She swallowed.
Ashleigh put her hands on either side of his face and kept looking into his eyes, wanting to show him her sincerity.
“I’m trying,” she whispered.
Caleb let out the breath he had been holding. His eyes glistened with unshed tears. He smiled.
“I believe you,” he whispered back.
They both stared at each other, their vision blurred by the tears in their eyes.
Ashleigh leaned forward and gave him a soft yet lingering kiss.
When she pulled away, she was surprised to see the hospital room was gone. However, she looked around the room and recognized it immediately.
“This is your bedroom,” she said.
“I thought we both might feel a little more comfortable here,” Caleb replied with a gentle smile.
Ashleigh looked down to see that she no longer wore a hospital gown. Instead, she wore a t-shirt and a pair of comfortable lounge pants. She pulled at the collar of her shirt, looking at her shoulder. The bruising was gone.
“I thought you might be a little more comfortable in that,” he said.
Ashleigh looked up at him and smiled. Then, she moved to straddle him.
“Most men imagine their fiancée in something a little more… revealing,” Ashleigh giggled, tracing a finger down his chest.
Caleb smiled and reached up to her shoulders. He brought his hands down the length of her arms, her outfit changing as he moved.
Ashleigh looked down to see herself wearing a lace and satin slip of deep blue, barely long enough to reach mid-thigh. The sheer material of the lace around her breasts left very little to the imagination.
Ashleigh blushed and looked away as Caleb pulled her closer to him.
“In my thoughts, when I can’t have you near me,” he whispered against her ear, sending a hot bolt through her body as he slipped his finger under the spaghetti strap and traced it over her shoulder. “Yes.”
Caleb turned them both, rolling her back onto her side. Her slip was gone, and the t-shirt and lounge pants were back.
She lay with her head on the pillow, their eyes locked. He moved his arms to once more envelop her in his warmth.
“But right now, we both need more comfort than pleasure,” he whispered, kissing the top of her head and hugging her close.