105 Two, Treated as One
Ashleigh had followed the wolf into the trees.
She remembered the large wolf walking directly in front of her. Looking down and seeing the big pawprints in the snow that Ashleigh’s paw could only half-fill. But when she looked up again, there was no wolf, no trees, no snow.
Ashleigh wore a pale blue dress, soft and flowing like a nightgown. Her hair was tied up in a loose braid over her shoulder.
She was sitting in a room whose walls were painted in dark hues of blue, with random spots of white and silver. It took her a moment, but she finally realized she had seen the evening sky. The paint continued onto the ceiling until it met at the center. A large round window let in the moonlight.
Though she knew the full moon had already passed, she was amazed to see it again.
“Our home is always bathed in the full light of the Goddess.”
The soft voice surprised Ashleigh, who let out a gasp. She turned to see a tall woman with pale skin and long black hair looking back at her. She wore a long white dress with teardrop sleeves. The lower half of her hair laid loosely at her back and shoulders, while the upper half was done with braids and two buns layered together, one smaller than the other.
“It’s alright,” the woman called out. “You know me already.”
Ashleigh was confused. She had never met this woman before.
“I am Lian.”
As though a switch was flipped, Ashleigh suddenly knew. This was the wolf whom she had followed into the trees. She looked back up at Lian. She saw the crescent-shaped mark appear at the center of her brow like a faded birthmark.
“Lian…” Ashleigh whispered.
Lian nodded, her tiny mouth curving into a soft smile.
“Do you remember anything that we have talked about?” Lian asked as she moved closer to Ashleigh..
Ashleigh shook her head.
“It is alright if you do not. The effects of the pure moonlight make it hard to remember.”
There was a slight concern in Ashleigh’s eyes.
“It is ok. We will talk again. It is almost time for you to go home. I will make sure you remember the things you need to before you do.”
Ashleigh nodded.
“Let us start with why you are different from most wolves.”
Lian moved across the room to stand before Ashleigh. She looked up at the moonlight and then moved her hand. A haze fell over the light, changing the bright white into a soft blue instead.
“Now, you will be able to remember the things we talk about.”
“What about everything else? I don’t know how, but I know I have been here longer than I think,” Ashleigh asked.
“You have been here for two days.”
“And I won’t remember anything except this conversation?”
“That is correct,” Lian smiled.
“Why?”
“Because it is dangerous. The time you have spent here has been to allow your mind to understand and for us to see the truth of your problem. It is time now for you to understand. But the secrets of the Priestesses must remain with us.”
Ashleigh nodded. While she didn’t enjoy the idea that a part of her memory would always be lost to her. She understood that it was necessary.
“Let us begin,” Lian said as she faced Ashleigh. “You are the result of a rare condition. Do you know when the mate bond is given to each of us?”
“No,” Ashleigh replied.
“The Goddess blesses the mother of every wolf from the first full moon after conception,” Lian stated. “Even if the wolf is not brought into this world, they were already blessed by the Goddess.”
“What does that mean?” Ashleigh asked.
“Even if a baby is lost, it was already blessed by the Goddess.”
“You mean, wolves out there will never find their mate because they were never actually born?”
“Yes,” Lian replied.
“That is so sad,” Ashleigh said quietly.
“It is a part of life. The souls will have a chance to meet again in the next life.”
“Oh…” Ashleigh replied, “but, what does this have to do with me?”
“Like I said, you result from a rare condition,” Lian said. “One so rare that we have not seen or heard of another in over one hundred years.”
Ashleigh was shocked.
“Werewolves do not produce many children. Most mated pairs will produce two children at most. This is by design. The Goddess has blessed us and loves us as her own. But we are still dangerous creatures that need to be kept in check.”
Ashleigh was having a hard time understanding why any of this mattered. She was getting impatient.
“Do you know what twins are, Ashleigh?” Lian asked.
“Twins?”
Ashleigh tried to remember; it was a word she had heard before. It was on a program she had seen. Siblings of some kind.
“Isn’t it a pair of siblings?” she asked.
“It is a pair of siblings born together. Either one that became two, or two, treated as one.”
“Ok… but I don’t have a twin,” Ashleigh said. “I’ve never even heard of a wolf with a twin.”
“Yes, as I said, there have been no twins for more than one hundred years.”
“Then, I don’t understand what that has to do with me,” Ashleigh sighed.
“You do not have a twin now, but you did once.”
Ashleigh took a step back, her brows scrunched together in her confusion.
“Please have a seat. I will explain.”
Ashleigh looked back; a chair sat behind her. One she hadn’t noticed before. Nevertheless, she did as she was instructed and took a seat.
“But…no,” Ashleigh shook her head. “My mother would have told me.”
Lian took a seat in front of Ashleigh on a chair that only a moment before was not there.
“Your mother does not know.”
“How is that possible?” Ashleigh asked.
“She came to us when she became concerned. She had remained on the battlefield even after she learned of her pregnancy. After a particularly violent battle, she felt something was wrong. She was right.”
Ashleigh gasped, bringing her hand to her mouth. Then, she felt a tear hit her fingertips.
“It was not her fault; the fighting did not cause a problem. In truth, only her sensitivity to her pregnancy told her something was wrong. But there was nothing she could have done. That anyone could have done to save your sister.”
“Sister?” Ashleigh asked, her voice shaking. “What happened to my sister?”
“You and she were conceived, and for a while, you grew together. But at a certain point, your sister no longer grew, and eventually, she was absorbed into you. The humans have called this, Vanishing Twin Syndrome.”
Ashleigh took several deep breaths, having a hard time understanding and accepting the things she was hearing.
“I killed my sister?” she asked, finally finding her voice again.
“Your sister is a part of you. She was not strong enough to survive on her own. But what strength she did have, she gave to you.”
Ashleigh curled into herself, tears falling, a sense of confused guilt running wild over her entire being.
After several silent minutes, Ashleigh sat up. She wiped her tears and looked up at Lian, who sat still, patiently waiting for Ashleigh to finish her emotional breakdown.
“So, I was once two people. And now I am one,” Ashleigh summarized. “What does this mean for Caleb and Granger?”
She could guess. She knew the answer. But she wanted it all laid out in front of her by someone else.
“You are their mate. Both of them.”
Ashleigh closed her eyes and nodded her head. She knew this was the answer. It only added to her frustration.
“But…” Lian said.
Ashleigh looked up.
“Only one of them is yours,” Lian replied, giving Ashleigh a soft smile. “You carry both your own bond and that of your sister. Each man belongs to one of those bonds. But your sister is not you. Her bond is not yours.”
“So, I do have a true mate…?” Ashleigh whispered. “I don’t have a choice?”
“You always have a choice,” Lian countered, “the Goddess does not enforce her will. She offers a blessing. And what is a blessing to one, can be a curse to another. Those here who have devoted themselves to the Goddess reject her blessing. We do not seek our mates. We seek her.”
Ashleigh sniffed and wiped her tears. Finally, she sat up straight and cleared her throat.
“Do you know who my true mate is?” she asked.
Lian nodded her head.
Ashleigh licked her lips nervously before finally asking, “Who is it?”