Extra: OVERTIME AFFECTION

"God. I'm so tired. So fucking tired of this." Mordecai covered his eyes in despair for a few instants.

[SYSTEM NOTIFICATION: Do it. You must do it for the plot.] 

"And that's the entire fucking problem. Living in peace was too much, right? I'm totally uninspired right now. I don't feel like it. Stop harassing me. I'm tired, and I need to send Larry to clean new dungeons." He slammed his hands on his newly fresh AI-Updated Mahogany Corporate Desk™.

[SYSTEM REPLY: Do it or the admin is going to summon an annoying fairy guide.]

"Of course he's going to. That asshole has nothing better to do." Mordecai leaned on his ergonomic leather chair, stretching his arms. "Working a fourteen-hour shift wasn't this stressful, I swear. At least I had coffee breaks."

The problem with being forced to roleplay and to perform necromancy on a specific schedule was that inspiration didn't come with a punch clock.

Our beloved fake necromancer stood in his office because the Higher Realms wanted to see him perform another act of his(in)famous 'Fake Necromancy' to summon new waifus (nightmares).

And yet, the System screen flickered once again.

[QUEST: SUMMON NEW NARRATIVE ASSETS. (WAIFU-CLASS ENTITY).]

[OBJECTIVE: EXPAND THE HAREM ROSTER TO IMPROVE QUARTERLY READER ENGAGEMENT.]

[CURRENT PROGRESS: 0%.]

[NOTE: WHY ARE YOU STILL STANDING THERE DOING NOTHING? MOVE!]

"I'm thinking. I know that you're used to protagonists without a functioning brain, but sadly for you, I'm an overthinker." He muttered at the notification.

[SYSTEM REPLY: THE READERS DON'T PAY FOR THINKING. THEY PAY FOR CONTENT.]

Mordecai pinched the bridge of his nose as he heard the same thing for the 30th time.

The reason why Mordecai wasn't doing anything was very simple: he wasn't feeling it today. He was bored.

Every time he tried to channel the correct amount of edgy energy to extract the soul of a fallen waifu from a [SSS Ordinary Heroic Lace Panties], his heart wasn't in it.

He was using the newer junk items brought by his beloved Larry, who gave him a double thumbs-up👍, because this time he felt prouder and happier than usual.

"System, do you know that forcing a necromancy act right now would only cause trouble and narrative stress? Can't I do it tomorrow?" He asked.

[SYSTEM REPLY: No. Do it. Try to say something cool this time.]

After that ragebait reply, Mordecai sighed, and then, with the exact same energy as an office worker at three in the afternoon on a Monday morning he tried to say a 'cool' line.

"Awaken, soul of the abyss... whatever." He even yawned.

A purple light came out from the [SSS Ordinary Heroic Lace Panties], but it wasn't enough.

The ritual circle sputtered and died with a sad little pffft.

[SYSTEM NOTIFICATION: SUMMONING FAILED. OF COURSE]

[REASON:INSUFFICIENT MOTIVATION. (You feel nothing. The void feels nothing back)]

"Good. That's mutual." He said flatly. "I feel the same emotions I felt when I summoned Wukong. You're lying." Mordecai said.

[REPLY FROM THE HIGHER REALMS]

[Lord Dibbs57]: Oh no. Take a rest, please.

[Lord Lukas_the_Great]: Dude, where tf are the waifus? Where's my goth French maid with pitch black eyes and big boobs? AH? Don't make me leave a bad rating, come on!

[Gacha_Addict_69]: "BRO WHERE ARE THE WAIFUS? I PAID FOR PREMIUM CONTENT. I WANT A GOTH MOMMY WITH A COLLAR AND A WHIP. GET TO WORK."

Without reading the other comments, Mordecai had officially decided that he was about to argue with the System once again and to take a rest.

But suddenly, a soft knock echoed against the cool wooden door of his office.

Three knocks, evenly spaced, and professionally timed. He perfectly knew who it was.

"Come in, Cassandra." He said, internally screaming with joy because he finally had an excuse to dump that mission.

Then, the door slid open with a low administrative hum, and the Iron Banshee stepped inside.

She was immaculate as always. Her spectral uniform fit her within an inch of her afterlife, her glasses sat in perfect alignment on the bridge of her nose, and every movement carried the efficiency of someone who had filed hundreds of years' worth of paperwork without a single missed deadline.

But when she was in front of Mordecai, her pale eyes lingered on him for a moment longer than usual.

She saw how tired he looked, and that was obvious. A CEO in another world is always tired, it's not like Earth. But there was also something else. He was calm. Different. Like a peaceful sea.

"W-With permission, my Liege," She said, inclining her head.

"Oh, hello, Cassandra. How is it going?" Mordecai gestured vaguely toward one of the chairs the System had insisted on installing for "employee comfort compliance." He smiled. "Have a seat, please. What brings you here? Tell me everything, please. Take as much time as you want."

Cassandra sat almost immediately. She then crossed her ankles and placed her hands in her lap before adjusting her glasses, which did not need adjusting. After that, she cleared her throat with the precision of a businesswoman who was about to open a difficult negotiation.

"Ahem..." Her eyes darted from side to side. "I would... have a request. A f-formal one."

The stammer was so small that it could have been a rounding error, but our beloved fake necromancer caught it, and his stomach immediately turned.

'Oh no.'

The nervous throat cleaning... the averted gaze... the pulsing neon blue glow beginning to dust her cheeks... every piece was in its place.

[STATUS EFFECT APPLIED: CLICHÉ NAUSEA.]

[SOURCE: BLUSHING SECRETARY FORMAL REQUEST EVENT. BRACE YOURSELF.]

Mordecai swallowed the wave of narrative queasiness and ignored his stomach ache, keeping his face neutral.

"W-What is it, Cassandra?" His right eyebrow twitched.

The Banshee's composure held for just one more second before a crack ran through it.

Her fingers tightened in her lap, and her cooling system emitted a high, thin whir, suspiciously like a nervous breath.

"Well... It's... it has been some time now that I've been buried under work," she said, each word placed carefully, like she was repeating a script. "And I... I only wanted..." Her voice dropped to almost a whisper. "...to spend some time with you, my Liege."

For a moment, Mordecai just looked at her.

And then, something clicked, making the [Cliché Nausea] fade away, replaced by something very close to a small sense of... guilt?

"You're right," he said slowly, rubbing his chin. "Now that I think about it, you weren't at the celebration when we 'won', were you? You were still in Oakhaven with Brenda, handling the paperwork."

Cassandra nodded. That movement was very small.

She then started trembling, and surely not from cold, since she was already dead and immune to it, but from something closer to fear. A request to spend some private time with the CEO? Come on. That was hard even for Lucy.

Mordecai stared at her for a few instants, and then smiled.

"Alright, then."

After his words, Cassandra's whir hitched.

"Go put on something less formal, Cassandra. We'll go for a walk around Oakhaven." He then stood up, stretching the stiffness out of his edgy shoulders. "But first, I want to check on how Yssrath's doing. So go get ready and wait for me outside the guild. Remember to call me 'Kaitoyama'. I still have to be in disguise."

A normal girl would've screamed after such a bomb.

But Cassandra was a true professional. She rose from her chair with impeccable posture, inclined her head with textbook deference, and walked toward the door at a measured pace that betrayed absolutely nothing.

Inside her head, however, hundreds of years of rigidity-filed logic dissolved into a single line of text:

'My first date... in thousands of years... I need to prepare a plan. An itinerary. And informed consent forms in triplicate.'

The neon-blue glow on her cheeks had spread all the way to the tips of her ears by the time the iron door hummed shut behind her.

She was so excited that she even forgot to say 'See you later, My Liege' to him.

Mordecai watched her go without saying a word.

He just sighed.

But internally, he was happy, because he had an excuse to avoid that fake necromancy.

He then let himself fall back into his chair, rubbing his forehead, before calling out for his System.

"Alright, System, put that fake necromance in stand-by. I have a date." He said, satisfied.

[SYSTEM REPLY: QUEST 'FAKE NECROMANCY' PAUSED.]

[ADMIN NOTE: THE HIGHER REALMS ARE REALLY DISAPPOINTED, BUT ALSO CURIOUS. YOU MAY PROCEED.]

He mentally rolled his eyes.

"Curious? Perfect. At least they won't bother me. Thank God." He said.

He then stretched his arms above his head once again, but before he could fully relax before that date, a very important thought crossed his mind.

'Wait... Where's Larry? I haven't heard his scrik-scrik since this morning briefing. I'm pretty worried.'

Usually, Larry would have appeared just three times by that time of the day, either to show a newly polished spoon or to give an encouraging thumbs-up from a random corner of the room.

So cute. He was worried for his little skeleton.

After a few instants, Mordecai started channeling his Discord-Call powers, activating the telepathic link with the Skeletal Archivist.

'Ugo.'

The reply was immediate, professional as always.

'Yes, My Leader? How can I assist you today?'

'I need to know where Larry is. I haven't seen him in a while, and I am pretty worried.' Mordecai said, with his eyes closed.

There was a small pause. Then, Ugo's voice returned, carrying a hint of something that sounded like... amusement? What?

'Ah, My Leader. Larry is pretty busy right now, along with Carry and Wukong.' Ugo said, sounding like he was holding out a laugh.

Mordecai blinked with his eyes closed. 'Busy? What?' He asked.

'Well.' A small pause. 'They are building sandcastles, My Leader.'

Silence. Total silence.

'... Sandcastles.' Mordecai repeated, thinking he had heard it wrong.

'Yes, My Leader. Larry and Carry had built a rather impressive fortress, complete with moats and battlements, using a combination of fine gravel and premium-grade silica that was recently found in one of the new dungeons he cleared.'

Mordecai pinched the bridge of his nose after hearing that.

'And... Wukong? What is she doing?'

'She is... supervising. She has been polishing spoons at an aggressive rate while simultaneously criticizing the integrity of Larry's battlements.'

'Of course she is. She wants to be my favorite.' Mordecai said.

'However, My Leader, there is a secondary development that may be of your interest.' Ugo said.

Mordecai's eye twitched. 'I'm afraid to ask, but I need to know.'

'Wukong has discovered the [Jade Emperor Chipped Chalice] among the items that Larry has recently recovered.'

Mordecai's blood ran cold because he remembered that item perfectly. The one that Larry had recovered from the Putrified Ruined King, and one of the items he was using for the Fake Necromancy.

That item clearly belonged to the Jade Emperor, the ruler of the Heavenly Court. The being who had once asked for help from the real Buddha to stop Wukong. In the end, the poor monkey was imprisoned beneath a mountain for 500 years.

'Just imagine the chaos if those two would meet.' Mordecai thought.

'Well... and what did Wukong do when she discovered it? She never said anything to me.'

'She became pretty... agitated, My Leader. She didn't want you to notice.' A pause. Ugo probably checked if she was there. 'She began to sniff the air with considerable intensity, and she kept repeating, 'If that useless God gets close to my Buddha, I'll rip her into pieces. She made fun of me by making me take care of horses...''

Mordecai took a deep breath.

'She said that, right? Are these the exact words?' Mordecai asked.

'Word for word, My Leader. I must also confess that I did not fully comprehend what she meant.' Ugo said, his voice uncertain.

Mordecai let out another long, slow breath.

Of course he knew what she was referring to.

She was given the position of "Protector of Horses" in the Heavenly Court, and that was a deliberately insulting, low-ranking title to humiliate her. After that, she became furious and immediately rebelled, doing impossible things and almost destroying everything.

That poor monkey had never forgotten that insult. And now, thousands of years later, she had just found a fragment of the Jade Emperor's personal chalice in the fortress of her beloved Buddha.

'She thinks that the Jade Emperor is coming for me,' Mordecai realized. 'And she's ready to start a war. Not even I can stop her if she goes to attack.'

'My Leader?' Ugo's voice cut through his thoughts. 'Is there a problem?'

'Ugo,' Mordecai said slowly, 'Keep an eye on Wukong. If she starts sharpening her staff, or if she mentions anything about 'storming the heavens', inform me immediately, please.'

'Understood, My Leader. I shall add it to the priority monitoring list.'

Mordecai then rubbed his temples. 'Anything else I should know, Ugo?'

The Skeletal Archivist paused for a few instants, and when he spoke, his voice carried a note of something that might have been... pity?

'There is one more matter, My Leader...' A small pause. 'Larry has completed the sanitation of the first two newly spawned dungeons, and the results were... highly efficient...'

"Good. That's what I wanted to hear,' Mordecai looked satisfied.

'Indeed.' He replied, his voice professional. 'However, during the process, Larry also recruited some new personnel for the company. They're under Brenda's eye right now for their contracts.'

Mordecai narrowed his closed eyes. 'New... personnel?'

'Yes, My Leader. And among them, there is a young adventurer who possesses a rather... unique condition.'

Mordecai was ready for another copy-pasted character.

'What kind of condition?' He asked, scared to hear the answer.

'The worst enemy of this world is a copyright strike. I can't allow that.' He thought.

'He keeps dying, My Leader.' Ugo said.

Our beloved fake necromancer blinked, confused. '...What?'

'Well... the young man appears to possess an unusual form of resurrection. He dies, and then he reappears in a different location, completely unharmed but significantly more traumatized than before, considering that he remembers everything. Larry has found his dead body four times in four different locations in the past two days. Judging from the reports, he even died crushed by a falling chandelier in a room that didn't even have a ceiling.'

Mordecai stared blankly at the wall. He perfectly knew who this guy was.

'Ugo. Are you telling me that Larry recruited a man whose primary skill is dying in increasingly ridicolous ways? That guy will be a mess to clean up!' Mordecai exclaimed.

'I believe that Larry saw some kind of potential in his resilience, My Leader. It seems like the young man has a... remarkable capacity for not staying dead. Brenda has already issued him a temporary employee ID badge and a mop.'

Mordecai kept staring at the wall.

'...Right.' That's the only thing he said.

'We could use him as a testing dummy for dungeon traps.' Ugo suggested.

'That would be cruel, Ugo.' He said.

'At least he'd be useful.' Ugo replied.

Then, Mordecai let out another long and slow breath that carried the weight of a thousand unpaid overtime hours.

'Ugo,' He said, his voice hollow.

'Yes, My Leader?

'Thank you for the report. I'll deal... with all of this later. For now, just... keep doing what you're doing, and tell Larry and Wukong they're doing a good job.'

'Of course, My Leader. Is there something in particular you want to tell them?' Ugo asked.

'Just tell them, 'Mordecai is proud of you.' Only that.'

'Understood. I'm going now, if you'll excuse me-' And then a small ping echoed in Mordecai's mind. The Discord call had ended.

Mordecai kept sitting in his chair while staring at the ceiling, trying to process everything he had just heard.

'Guess that it's time to go see Yssrath,' He muttered, pushing himself to his feet. 'At least the baby doesn't have any mythological grudges or suicidal tendencies.' A small pause. 'Yet.'

And then, he called out to the system.

"System, generate me a teleport for Vera's room." He ordered.

And in that moment, a purple portal appeared in front of him.

'Papa is coming, little one-' He said before stepping inside...