Chapter 361: The truth he did not want to hear (3)
‘She was haunted by you. At every moment of every day of her life without you, a ghost of you lingers. And each time she remembered you and wishing you were with her, it broke her apart. You didn’t see it because you were busy shooting a romantic epic with Katarina in the mountain of ice’
And there is a mocking tone in there but Azief did not notice it. Because as he heard the story, he could feel his heart hurting when he imagines how Sofia was feeling at that time.
Sina keep telling him about what happens back then
‘But I was there. I was there from the beginning and I saw it all. It was so bad that I had to told her to forget you. And you know how I have always been rooting for you and her. But I had to told her that’
She sighed and a tear escaped from her eyes as it falls down onto her thighs.
‘Because I’ve seen her back then and that is not how a person that is living acts. She walks fine, she eats fine and she looks fine. But she was dead inside. She was always on the verge of breaking down. Do you know hard it is for me to see that? I didn’t talk about this with you not even after you were back. We never had the chance. And I never like arguing with you’
She sighed and then she put down her finger and shakes her head and close her eyes to calms herself down.
Then calmly she said
‘But this…this got to stop…whatever this is. You have to let go. At least make it clear. I know what you are trying to do after this. It is the same old routine. You intimidate the world because you’re about to go somewhere else. Far away I guess. You’re going to leave them again without giving an answer’
‘All the more reason why you should make it clear. If anything happens to you, at least I want Sofia could live her life without being haunted of what could be. And if you love her and want to be with her, then be with her. Hold her hand, kiss her on her lips and sing her fucking love song. But if you don’t, then don’t give her false hope
Sina said, as she berated Azief.
Azief was stunned but Sina was not finished, not by a long shot. Since she was determined to say it, she is going to say it all, without regretting a single word.
‘You said I don’t understand?’ she asked, her eyebrows raised up at Azief like she was challenging and calling Azief bullshit
She almost shouted the next word
‘Yes, I don’t fucking understand you Azief! I don’t know what you experienced before the Fall but I know this. After the Fall, let me ask you this question Azief, and answer it honestly in your heart. I ask you, have you ever been lacking?’
Azief look at Sina and it was like he was seeing Sina in a different light than before.
He always knew that Sina and Sofia were close but looking at this they were not just close. Sina thought of herself as Sofia older sister and unconsciously Azief smile.
Because at least he didn’t have to worry about Sofia anymore.
Sina added
‘You have loyal friends that will follow you to the ends of the earth, loyal subordinates that would die for you and people who loved you. Is it…so fucking hard to open your fucking heart to other people? Is your heart a nuclear bunker?’ she shouted
‘I’m done and tired of seeing my best friend, a person I thought of as my own sister crying her heart out because of you. It is always because of you. You could call her weak, you could call her emotional, but don’t YOU.DARE to ever question her love for you’
She said with her voice tone high and full of emotion.
But, hell, she isn’t done.
‘So what if she wasn’t beside you when you almost died? I saw her die countless of times when she thought you were dead. I saw her die every day missing you like a crazy person’
Then she ended her tirade.
But there is still the last word.
She looks at Azief and said with a disdain in her tone of voice.
‘Azief. You always said love is your weakness. I don’t think that is really true. I think it is a weapon you use to hurt the people who loves you’
Azief was shook internally as he looks stunned and speechless after hearing what Sina have to say. Every word seems to still ring inside his ears.
And then Sina got up from her floating seat and landed on the ground. She then waved her hand and said
‘I said everything I have to say to you. In the end it is always up to you’ Then she walked down from her chair and went to look at the other patients.
New acolyte that didn’t know the exchange between Sina and Azief is slowly coming to the infirmary to stand guard and watch the patient.
Azief stand there, looking like something is stuck on his mouth. He couldn’t say anything as he could only saw Sina ignoring him and is checking the patients.
Azief was stunned. Because some of what she was saying is the truth. From three years ago, he keeps standing still. He stands still while the rest of the world moves away from him.
He realizes how everyone is moving on with their lives. Wang Jian is now with Somi loving each other happily. Sina is with Loki though she denies it.
The Immortal Couple, even without powers and influence seems to live blissfully happy
Even Budiman have some people he is courting. Everyone seems to be moving on, and living their life. Loving and living
He remembers that question he asked himself. He used to ask himself. Is he abandoning the people that he cares about, or are those people abandoning him?
He used to think that maybe he is walking too fast and they stopped following because they could not follow, or maybe is it because he walked too fast and those people, no longer wanted to follow
But…. could it be…it is not that they don’t want to follow. It is not because he walked to fast. And maybe it is not because they could not follow.
Maybe the simple truth was because he pushed them away with his self-doubts.
There is too many monster in his head and in his heart that maybe he was too blind of it and pushed everyone he cares about away.
It wasn’t because they don’t want to follow. It is not because he walked too fast. it is not because they could not follow.
It is because he did not want them to follow.
He was so used to misery and sadness, that he forgotten that there is nothing to be gain from being in sadness and letting misery controls you.
He sighed at this revelation and then he walks out of the room and fly away to his residence.
Sina raises up her head and sigh as she looks at the silhouette of Azief disappears from her sight.
She walks and approached the bed where Katarina and Sofia is lying on. She looks at both of them and a smile formed on her face.
Then she sighed and said
‘Its fine now. You both don’t have to pretend. I know both of you are awake and heard it’
Sofia and Katarina slowly opens their eyes. They look at the ceiling of the infirmary and then closes their eyes and opens it back as they digest what they just heard.
And then they both look at their sides and saw each other. There is a complicated gaze when they look at each other.
Sina look at them and shakes her head and said
‘I told him the words you are not brave enough to say, Sofia’ she said to Sofia. Sina then turn to Katarina and said
‘And I express your desire for him to choose between her or Sofia for you Katarina. So, don’t you dare blame what happens next to me. Girls got to stay together. You have no great enmity or hatred between you. It would be so sad to see both of you battling it out for a man. He is a man. He should act like one. What is this wishy washy way of doing thing?’
Katarina only chuckles and Sofia smiles.
They look at each other and while their gaze when looking at each other is still complicated it is not one of resentment.
This event in the infirmary of Pandemonium would probably one day become a side note in history of how two of the most powerful woman in the world that has always been seen as rivals both in position or love laughed sincerely with each other.
Sian look at both of them and wonder in her heart
‘How did that idiot make this two woman fall head over heels over him?’ Then thinking about it again Sina smiles
Love after all….has no logic.
***
End of this chapter. Next chapter would be about the matter that happened in Pandemonium