Limitless Evolution As a Snake

Chapter 254: Three Stars for Attempted Kidnapping

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The monster came out of its container mouth first, which saved it the trouble of making a friendly introduction before trying to eat Bridget. I struck the door with a solid coil, knocking it sideways long enough for her to move behind the first crate.

It landed across the service aisle on four thick legs, with a flat armoured back and a jaw wide enough to regret inviting guests. The creature was longer than my whole body and smelled like old bins left somewhere hot enough to develop political opinions.

[System: That’s a dumpjaw, mate, and it hasn’t come for networking. Keep its mouth facing away from the room unless you want the sponsors counted as finger food.]

If it eats Adrian, I’m refusing to fill out the customer feedback form, but I’ll keep the rest off the menu. I rose above its snapping teeth while she pulled the prisoner container’s release handle and Lukas dragged a serving trolley across the entrance to the main hall.

Iona emerged first, a stoat woman in a stained medical jacket with one ear bent beneath a dressing. She pulled two exhausted delivery workers after her and immediately ordered them towards the kitchen, sounding much less interested in freedom than keeping everybody alive long enough to enjoy it.

Rusk had disappeared behind her guards while Adrian shouted that all exits should remain clear. [System: Listen to the prick discover fire safety, mate; ten minutes ago he was selling the benefits of a locked fucking door.] I followed the dumpjaw instead of Adrian’s excuses.

The dumpjaw hit the trolley hard enough to bend its frame, sending plates across the floor while Lukas pulled his web free before the impact reached his ribs. He swore, stayed on the ground and helped a waiter drag the fallen barrier towards the wider kitchen doors.

I needed the beast following me instead of people who couldn’t hover above their mistakes. I took a roast from a passing tray and held it between two coils, then told the nearest guests that the premium feeding experience had been cancelled due to budget concerns.

The dumpjaw turned when the meat struck its nose, and I shot towards the now-empty stage with my fins spread. It followed through the curtain, dragging broken fabric across the lighting stands while the audience finally accepted that the entertainment required some walking.

[System: Use the bolted cage frame, champ; the bastard’s got a mouth like a pub bore and about the same ability to know when it should shut.]

I’ll get it stuck on the furniture, and you can tell me later why every date needs an accidental engineering qualification. I passed through the open cage door and circled above the heated rock, letting the dumpjaw see a meal with nowhere sensible to go.

It lunged into the doorway with its lower jaw almost scraping the floor. I fired the jets along my fins and climbed through the space above its armoured shoulders, feeling its teeth miss my tail before its open mouth struck the cage’s upright support.

The impact broke the lower part of its jaw against the fixed steel, leaving it thrashing where the doorway narrowed around its head. I stayed clear of the legs, formed a dense cutting edge along a smoke tendril and drove it into the exposed side behind the skull.

The creature jerked once, then dropped against the rock with enough weight to crack its smooth edge. I waited until it stopped moving before pulling free, annoyed that even a successful rescue had found a way to damage my holiday accommodation.

[System: Qualifying kill confirmed, nine out of ten, and that’s another thousand EXP in the account. You’re at eight thousand now, so please resist invoicing the corpse for your bloody rock.]

Its employer is still breathing somewhere, which gives me several better billing options. I found Bridget outside the service exit with Iona and the two workers, all three now beyond the guards and speaking to the officers the venue had finally called.

The gold-jacketed donor was showing her recording to anyone who tried describing the creature release as an accident. Adrian stood several steps away insisting he hadn’t approved prisoners, and Bridget told him to remain available until somebody with authority decided whether that distinction helped him.

Rusk’s vehicle had left through the freight gate while we fought the dumpjaw. One of her remaining guards tried following it until Iona identified him as the man who had locked their container, and an officer moved between him and the road.

I wanted to chase the captain immediately, but Lukas had gone pale beneath his borrowed jacket and was trying to breathe without moving his ribs. I pushed a chair towards him with a coil and told him sitting down was part of his extremely convincing employment disguise.

Bridget checked my torn scales and refused my suggestion that I’d earned a more flattering inspection, while Iona borrowed the first-aid supplies without indulging either of us. The medic found more patience for my injuries than for my complaint about the rock, although she did ask whether the rock had also been advertised as an unpaid volunteer. I decided I liked her, despite her refusal to let me claim emotional damage on behalf of the furniture.

Old Mate marked the party mission complete once the workers were safe and the false display was publicly exposed. The extra thousand EXP brought me to 9,000, and the ten IP raised my total to 145 without repairing a single sore patch.

"I’m beginning to dislike jobs where the performance bonus can’t be used as a bandage," I muttered aloud. Bridget asked whether I meant the capture payment, so I agreed before Old Mate could enjoy how close I’d come to explaining him.

Iona thanked us, then asked whether any other prisoners had reached the venue. When Bridget said the remaining container was empty equipment, the medic counted quietly on her fingers and looked towards the eastern freight road.

There had been twelve of them at the Drop Off camp before Rusk selected three for the demonstration. The other nine were still there, and the trucks carrying them beyond the protected boundary were scheduled to leave at dawn.

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