Joy of Life

No more, no less, just one tear. Fan Xian watched this and couldn’t resist shaking his head, but he couldn’t say anything. He felt around beside him for a while and found a ribbon from among the clothes. Moving to the little Emperor’s side, he gently dabbed at it.

The little Emperor recovered her calm at an astonishing speed. Her naked shoulders slid easily into the plain white robes. Her black hair laid against her shoulders. Her expression was calm. There was no more charm. Matched with her indifferent eyes, she gave off a sense of age unique to Shangjing.

She looked calmly at Fan Xian until he felt uncomfortable. She then warmly said, “Help me brush my hair.”

After saying these words, she turned and presented her smooth neck, thin back, and black hair to Fan Xian’s eyes. Finding a Cang Mountain wooden comb from somewhere, she handed it to Fan Xian.

In this world, on the second day of marriage, there was a complicated hair brushing ceremony. In wealthy households, there would be a nanny or servant of some status organizing it. If it was a poor family, it would be the mother-in-law who personally did it for the daughter-in-law.

For the Northern Qi Emperor, it was unlikely she would ever be married. As a woman, it must be said that this was a kind of sorrow. In this deep night, she wanted Fan Xian to brush her hair for her.

Fan Xian accepted the comb and slowly began to move his arm, allowing the perfectly spaced wooden teeth to slip through the black hair. The little Emperor’s hair gradually became tamed and neat. Their hearts were also gradually combed clear.

Fan Xian could embroider and could do hair. He was a good man in the boudoir. In a moment, he had helped the little Emperor fix her hair into a style that was clearly not one a virgin would wear but also not one for a mature wife. Using the faint moonlight streaming in through the window, the little Emperor looked at it for a moment in the mirror. She seemed satisfied with Fan Xian’s handiwork.

During the process of fixing her hair, neither of them spoke. Each was lost in their own thoughts. It seemed that neither knew how they should deal with the situation between them. After a moment, Fan Xian’s broke the silence and asked, “Why me?”

This question wasn’t directed at the current situation, state affairs, or the little Emperor’s last words, which were said in an intoxicated-like state. It was directed at a summer many years ago, at the little temple. Other than a few princesses, this generation of the Northern Qi Zhan royal family only had this one cross-dressing little Emperor. The population was at zero. If she wanted to continue on the bloodline of the Northern Qi royal family, the little Emperor needed her own child.

Even if she had to take a big risk, she still had to have her own child. That was why, in that summer night a few years ago, Haitang Duoduo had stopped at nothing to lure Fan Xian to that temple.

Fan Xian only wanted to confirm why Zhan Doudou had chosen to borrow his seed. Perhaps for many people, being a stud seemed rather humiliating. Fan Xian didn’t feel like that. It seemed that his mother in this life had done something similar in the past. Furthermore, in order to be a stud, the bloodline needed to very good and powerful. It could be considered a different way of being recognized.

The little Emperor sat silently in front of him and didn’t reply for a long time. Suddenly, she said, “Your hair is also messy. I’ll help you fix it.”

Fan Xian didn’t refuse. Handing over the comb, he sat quietly at the side of the bed. The little Emperor half-kneeled on the bed and moved, with difficulty, to Fan Xian’s side on her knees. She then began to brush his hair.

Her posture kneeling like behind Fan Xian and leaning slightly against him seemed quite cute. She was truly like a little wife.

However, her hands were not very clever. A person who became an Emperor when they were born was indeed suited to the evaluation of being someone who never moved their four limbs. She had never done any work, much less something like fixing hair.

The wooden comb slid with difficulty through Fan Xian’s black hair. Occasionally, it tangled. The pulling caused Fan Xian to furrow his brows, but he didn’t say anything. He had helped the little Emperor brush her hair to sort out her slightly panicked state of mind after their first time showing love and consoling her desire to marry. Her brushing was her trying to behave more like a normal wife.

The little Emperor knelt beside him, brushing his hair without skill but with great focus. Her eyes dropped slightly and landed on the edge of the bed by Fan Xian’s hand. There were a number of slender needles lined up in order, shining with a different light. Some were poisonous and others were not.

During their intimate rubbing earlier, she had noticed Fan Xian carefully removing these items from his hair.

She couldn’t see Fan Xian’s face, only his back. Her expression relaxed. To not have Fan Xian see her expression was something that made her feel at ease. In this instant, a faint affection and infatuation surged up in the little Emperor’s eyes. Although it immediately became calm, it still revealed the true affection she had in the depths of her heart for this young man.

This was precisely what Fan Xian did not understand. Why choose him? Did the little Emperor actually like him?

“Your bloodline is very good.” The little Emperor lowered her head. Her scattered bangs swung gently in front of her forehead. “Since I’ll eventually have a child, of course, I hope to find a good father for the child.”

“What is good about my bloodline?” Fan Xian felt the comb stop on his head. Slowly, he said, “The bloodline of the Qing royal family flows through my body. Are you willing to have such a child become the future ruler of Northern Qi?”

The little Emperor began to move the comb again somewhat shakily. Quietly, she said, “At that time, Haitang, Lili, and I did not know you were the Qing Emperor’s illegitimate child.”

“Then, what exactly did you see in me?” Fan Xian smiled tartly. Slowly lowering his head, he used the bright and astute moonlight to look at the little Emperor’s smooth leg by his waist extending out from under her white clothing. His back was warm and soft. It felt very good.

The little Emperor sighed and said as she combed, “I can’t hide this from your forever. If I said that I took fancy to your Tianmai bloodline, it also doesn’t make sense.”

“Not at that time,” Fan Xian replied calmly. “At that time, no one knew my mother was surnamed Ye.”

The little Emperor was silent for a long time. Suddenly, she said, “It’s been many years since you’ve written ‘Story of the Stone.'”

“Yes.” Fan Xian was suddenly distracted, like he was thinking of the two years they had been in close contact. Each time he finished writing a chapter in Jingdou, he would use the Overwatch Council’s express post to send it to Northern Qi’s Shangjing, into this little Emperor’s hands.

The first people in the world to notice that he was the person writing the “Story of the Stone” were Haitang Duoduo and this little Emperor. The call of “Master Gong” that night in the Palace had scared Fan Xian half to death. At that time, he had always thought that this little Emperor’s inclinations were rather shocking. He would never have guessed that the body under the dragon robe would be that of such a charming woman.

“I once told you that I like ‘Banxianzhai Poetry Anthology,'” The little Emperor said calmly with a slight smile.

Fan Xian made another sound of agreement.

“And, your appearance was not bad.”

“Your temper was also straightforward, not like a rotten scholar.”

The little Emperor lightly said a few things, but it made Fan Xian sink into silence. He knew that she was using these three sentences to express some kind of meaning. After a long time, he said, “You like me.”

The little Emperor thought for a long time and then nodded. She didn’t take notice of whether or not the back of Fan Xian’s head could see the movement.

Fan Xian suddenly laughed bitterly and said, “Should I feel honored?”

“I’ll allow you to feel pleased for a moment.” The little Emperor’s expression darkened. Looking at her appearance, it seemed as if she wished she could bite him again.

“I remember clearly the words you said in the Royal Palace,” the little Emperor quietly said after a moment of silence. It was as if she wanted to give Fan Xian an explanation for why she had tried to defeat him at all costs. “The first concern is the affairs of the world. Enjoying pleasure comes later. However, I could never believe if your so-called ‘world’ was the actual world or just the world of the Qing Kingdom.”

Fan Xian accepted this explanation because he had already thought about it for a long time. He could not trust in the Northern Qi court. No one would believe that the illegitimate son of the Qing Emperor was actually an internationalist, particularly such an intelligent and powerful figure as the little Emperor.

He suddenly turned around and looked calmly at her. The two of them were very close. They could feel each other’s heartbeat and the hot air of each other’s breaths. He looked at the youth between her brows. Suddenly, his heart twisted. He remembered that she was actually just a young girl, nothing more.

“You are an idiot,” Fan Xian said directly. “Since you decided to invest in me many years ago, then you have to keep investing. As I already said in the afternoon, if Ku He knew what you were doing, he would certainly die again of anger.”

The little Emperor’s expression changed, becoming more solemn. She was slightly angry.

Fan Xian did not care about. Coldly, he said, “You are my woman. From now on, abandon your unrealistic dreams. Don’t try to control me, and don’t try to use killing me to stir up trouble. What you need to do is cooperate with me.”

The little Emperor’s eyes lit up with anger. From birth until now, she had never met anyone who spoke to her in such a tone and with such naturalness.

“You are a remarkable woman. But, in the end, you are still a woman.” For some reason, Fan Xian suddenly thought of the Eldest Princess. Speaking a slightly more gentle tone, he said, “You and the empress dowager have put on a long show. You’ve successfully fooled the Eldest Princess, me, and even the Emperor. I thought there were problems within the Northern Qi Court, which made me think that there was a bigger meaning to our conversation by the Chang Pavilion and old road.”

He smiled self-mockingly and said, “I have put too much effort into all of this, so I won’t allow you to destroy it.”

“I am not a person to be threatened.” The little Emperor’s face became cold, she thought Fan Xian was going to return to the first topic.

“I would never threaten my own woman.” Fan Xian suddenly extended his hand and gently played with her bangs on her forehead. Gently, he said, “However, my woman must listen to me.”

When the little Emperor had woken from her stupor earlier, her first words had pierced right into Fan Xian’s inner heart. “My country is your country.” if it had been anyone else in Fan Xian’s, their heads would probably explode from the pain. However, he was not the same. From a long time ago, he knew his actions would be different from the ideals of the people in this world. He was prepared for this mentally.

Since it was his country, it must be controlled by him. Even the Northern Qi Emperor had to submit to his will. Conquering the ruler of a country seemed to be an impossible task. Conquering a woman, especially a woman that he liked, no matter how strong her will was or how great her power, he would still be able to find the sliver of a chance.

Each Emperor had his own officials. This was just a process of conquering and being conquered. Fan Xian only hoped that since they had this short-lived romance, she would become a bit more feminine.

However, the development of the situation seemed to have left Fan Xian’s control. The little Emperor looked at him calmly, without a trace of tiredness or a sense of dependence after release. There was only an eager anticipation and dissatisfaction. Fan Xian looked with slight nervousness into her eyes. He was unsure what she would do next.

“You are my man. Why can’t you listen to me?” The little Emperor asked Fan Xian calmly with a slight smile in her eyes.

Without waiting for him to reply, she gently bit her lower lip and moved closer to his ear. “Otherwise, how about we have another fight. Whoever loses obeys the winner?”

Her breath was hot and alluring. The two of them were close together, without a single gap between them. Suddenly hearing these words, Fan Xian’s mind spun. He wasn’t afraid when it came to fighting alluring women.

This was the little Emperor’s first taste of the connection between men and women. Additionally, her nature was strong. She had no fear of pain, only curiosity and joy. Fan Xian was drawn to her because of her status, as well as the hidden stubbornness in her bones. Each felt that this kind of challenge was stimulating, like the meeting of dry wood and flames. Each thirsted for the other’s body.

Even doing something so absurd needed the excuse of a major state affair. It was truly shameless. The little Emperor’s eyes were filled with rare charm. Fan Xian’s hand tightened. They fell together again.

…

…

The sky brightened early on the Sword Hut by the seashore. Faint early morning light spilled into the grass hut. Below the blanket on the big bed, the two people slowly came awake. Both struggled to open their eyes in their exhaustion. The little Emperor was tired and joyful as she huddled in Fan Xian’s arms and caught up on sleep. The wildness the previous night had perfectly compensated Zhan Doudou’s many years of mental regret. It finally made her realize that being a woman was actually a joyful matter. However, she had exhausted all of the energy in her body.

Fan Xian, who had clearly won the final victory, was even more tired. He opened his eyes and looked at the eaves above his head. Suddenly, an absurd feeling rose in his heart. It turned out that when it came to something like conquering, it indeed ended up in matters of the bed. The words Yan Bingyun had mocked with him that year had become reality.

If Sir Yan junior could see this scene and knew the details of it, he would probably jump down from the top of the Overwatch Council building.

Was this the legendary carrying a stick to walk the world? Fan Xian thought self-mockingly. He lowered his head to look at the woman in his arms with flushed cheeks. The night had been crazy. The female Emperor’s hard outer shell had finally been smashed by him. She had become a true woman. As for Fan Xian’s hard work, it was not enough to be told to outsiders.

A strange light suddenly flashed through his eyes. Lifting the blankets, he randomly threw on some clothes and walked to the door.

The little Emperor woke up, confused and stunned. She was unsure what was happening.

Footsteps stopped outside the door. The sound of the little sword boy’s respectful voice came through. Fan Xian answered. After waiting for him to leave, he carefully opened the door and carried back a large basin of hot water and various pastries, as well as some items to wash with.

The little Emperor half sat up in bed as her expression became solemn. She was clear-headed now after the craziness. She finally understood what she had done last night and what this represented. Most importantly, this place was not the Northern Qi Royal Palace. It also wasn’t the legendary Taiping courtyard Fan Xian posted heavy guards around. It was a relatively unknown place.

…

…

Given Fan Xian’s realm, there was no worry that someone would eavesdrop. Thus, when the little Emperor had indulged in her life, she had not thought about this problem. However, this sword boy’s arrival, as well as this large basin of hot water, made the little Emperor remember clearly that the person living in this Sword Hut was not just anyone. It was a Great Grandmaster.

Although the Sword Hut was large and the courtyard was deep, there would have been noise during last night’s wildness. Although Sigu Jian was heavily injured and close to death, he was still able to easily force back Lang Tiao and Yun Zhilan. Presumably, his cultivation remained. It would not be difficult matter for him if he wanted to hear what was happening in this room.

It was fine that Fan Xian knew the Northern Qi Emperor was a woman. After all, he was the little Emperor’s first and second, and perhaps only, man in her life. If this was known by other people, the little Emperor didn’t know what awaited her after her name and reputation were destroyed.

Under such a powerful attack, her face became solemn.

Fan Xian didn’t look at her expression. He only carried the hot water to the side of the bed with a slight smile and began to wipe her down. He knew it wasn’t convenient for her to move right now.

In one night, the distance between the two of them had entered the negative numbers, both physically but mentally. In the short break, other than brushing hair, holding hands, and picking at their palms, there was nothing else for the two guests in the Sword Hut to do other than talk.

They talked about their strange lives, their childhoods that were different to everyone else’s, how to cross-dress as a woman, how to be a man with a feminine face, how to deceive the public, how to sit on the throne, how to wash up, how to write poems, and other such things.

The little Emperor and Fan Xian were equals. They discussed each other’s lives seriously to see if there was anything they had not done well and sought a possible opportunity to better it with the other’s intelligence.

One night passed. Their hair did not turn white. They were as before. Other than the rubbing between the man and woman’s bodies, there was a mental connection and consolation, as well as a particularly stimulating sense of challenge rippling through their hearts.

The little Emperor pulled up the think blanket and covered her chest. Staring at Fan Xian, she growled in a low voice, “What if Sigu Jian finds out? I… I… I said many times for you to be gentler!”

Hearing these words, Fan Xian, who had put down the hot water basin and was having a drink of tea to soothe his throat, almost spat out his water. He walked to the side of the bed and gently caught her chin. Evenly, he said, “The old man is about to die. Even if he guessed something, we will deny it to our dying breaths. What is there to be scared about?”

The little Emperor coldly slapped his hand aside and said, “If my identity is exposed, you know how much trouble that will cause.”

Fan Xian fell silent. He knew that the world would descend into chaos if the news of the Northern Qi Emperor being a female got out. The Qing Kingdom would certainly not pass up on this opportunity and would certainly use it to send out troops.

“I’ve said many times, you have to trust me and cooperate with me. In the future, let me handle everything.” He placed his hands on the little Emperor’s naked shoulders and pressed down slightly, speaking in a sincere tone that brooked no argument.

…

…

The aces outside the Sword Hut had waited an entire night. The torches gradually burned out. Lang Tiao and the Northern Qi aces stared coldly at the door of the Sword Hut. They didn’t know if the Emperor would come to any harm. If he wasn’t worried about Fan Xian or Sigu Jian going crazy, Lang Tiao would not have held back his temper and waited outside the Sword Hut. He would have charged in leading everyone.

Sigu Jian had already demonstrated his attitude. The disciples of the Sword Hut would not charge in, but they were shocked. They didn’t know what had happened in the Sword Hut during this long night.

Time passed minute by minute. The patience of the people outside wore thinner and thinner. Yun Zhilan silently watched Lang Tiao’s expression. He knew that if the Sword Hut did not give an explanation soon, Lang Tiao would charge into the Hut again. In a few more days, the Northern Qi army would probably enter Dongyi.

“Since master has demonstrated his attitude, he would not allow the Emperor to come to any harm. Even if the Emperor is with Fan Xian, master will not allow a Qing person to show a glimmer of disrespect to the Emperor under his watch.” Yun Zhilan spoke in a low voice.

Lang Tiao relaxed slightly. Given Sigu Jian’s Great Grandmaster status and Dongyi’s situation, he would not watch as his Emperor was humiliated. After all, it was Sigu Jian who had given the invitations for the opening of the Sword Hut.

Lang Tiao no longer worried about the Emperor’s safety. But, he had not thought that in one night, the Emperor would be bullied into a woman. Sigu Jian would not watch as Fan Xian killed the Northern Qi Emperor. If the Northern Qi Emperor and Fan Xian willingly fought each other and got messy, there was nothing the Great Grandmaster could do.

…

…

When Fan Xian walked into the room in the deepest part of the Sword Hut in the morning light and saw the Great Grandmaster for the first time, he clearly saw a shocked and strange smile in this Great Grandmaster’s eyes.