Chapter 641 - Start Again (3)
Aiden wrapped his arms around Sarah and blocked her movements with his body. He whispered over her whimpers: "It's OK… I'm here… I love you… You are my only one…"
Sarah's body stopped trashing in his embrace, and she leaned her head on his shoulder. Tears streaming down her face didn't wake her up while he continued telling her that he loves her.
When Sarah's whimpers stopped and she completely calmed down, Aiden gently whipped her tears. He hoped that somehow his words reached her in her dream and made her relax.
Sarah inhaled and mumbled: "I love you… don't leave…" She shivered briefly before her breathing returned to slow and even.
Aiden looked at her and saw that she is still sleeping. His heart ached. He kissed her forehead and spoke softly, unable to prevent his voice from breaking: "I love you more… I'm not going anywhere."
Sarah woke up in good spirits. She always loved waking up next to Aiden. Having his arms around her was an extra treat that can fuel her day with positive energy.
Aiden was relieved that she does not remember having any dreams, and she described her sleep as pleasant. He hoped that her nightmare from previous night is not going to repeat again.
They spent the morning in the mall, the same one where they did Christmas shopping in December last year. Sarah bought some clothes for both of them and few absolutely unnecessary things such as a ceramic statue of a red cat and a curved tear-shaped orange glass vase. Aiden never saw her buying such things earlier, and he found it interesting.
...
After lunch they went to the arcade.
"This is the place where we held hands for the first time.", Sarah remembered.
"Correction: I held your hand. You let go of me as soon as you could." Aiden pouted, trying to tease her, but soon he retracted his pout and switched topic when he noticed that she is uncomfortable.
"This is the first place where you whooped me in that racing game." He pointed at the machine. "I improved since then. Do you want to try beating me again?"
Sarah laughed. "Your enthusiasm will not give you an edge."
...
After dinner they watched the same movie as previous night.
"Why do I have a feeling that this is how you are putting me to sleep?", Sarah protested that she had to wear her pajamas in order for movie to start.
"I want us to finish watching the movie. Is there anything wrong with that? And sleepwear in advance is only in case you sleep off before movie is over.", his reasoning was flawless.
She slept off before movie ended, and just like previous night, he carried her to bed.
Again, Sarah trashed and whimpered in her sleep and Aiden held her and spoke softly how much he loves her until she calmed down and resumed her sleep.
Next morning, while Sarah was in the shower, Aiden called JoAnna. He told her that Sarah is fine during the day (maybe too fine) and he told her how last two days went. Also, he told JoAnna that Sarah has nightmares in her sleep.
JoAnna thought for some time before responding. "I'm not a psychologist… But there are cases where people forget unpleasant things. Like selective amnesia. And it seems that it's coming back in her sleep, because subconsciously, she didn't forget."
"Will she remember it while she is awake?" Aiden was not sure if he wants Sarah to remember missing pieces or to keep them buried forever.
"It's highly possible that something will trigger her memories and they will come back."
Aiden frowned at the thought that this will happen without any warning. "Is there anything I can do?"
"Based on her behavior I can determine that, to Sarah, what happened is very stressful. And right now, her mind is rejecting it. But eventually she will need to face it. It will be up to her if she will come out of it stronger or defeated, and unfortunately, those outcomes will impact your relationship. It's a good thing that you are with her. Every good memory you create now will be her strength when she remembers… Think of it like she is free-falling, and every time something good happens you are creating a layer of padding that will cushion her fall."
"I see." Aiden sighed. "Any tips?"
JoAnna was surprised that Aiden asked for an advice from her. He never did anything like that, and it only shows how important this is to him. "Just treat her well. You don't need to go over the top. And don't treat her like a disabled person. She is a perfectly normal Sarah whose mind decided to push aside few events which she finds painful to face… other than that, even if her personality changed a bit, she is still your fiancée who loves you very much. Also, she might remember things today or in a week or in few years. This is not something we can predict, and we should not force it. The later it happens, easier it will be for her to brush it off like something that belongs in the past… and… Aiden, delete those photos."
"That is already done." He responded without missing a beat.
JoAnna was pleased to hear that. "Thank you for treating her well."
"I'm not doing this for her. I'm doing it for myself, because my happiness is tied to hers."
"Tell yourself that, if it makes you feel better. It does not change the fact that you are treating her well." JoAnna responded.
"I said that because it's the truth. Without Sarah I have no reason to exist. If she is not happy, my heart breaks. But just her being happy is not enough. I also need her by my side so that I can survive, because she is my light." His voice was full of determination and JoAnna can tell that he already has a something on his mind.
…
During breakfast, Sarah asked Aiden if he made any plans for the day.
He checked time. "In one hour, we are leaving."
His tone was casual, but Sarah could tell that it's not a simple outing. "Where?"
"I can tell you or surprise you. Which one you want?" Aiden smiled mysteriously.
Sarah shook her head excitedly while deciding. "How about something in the middle? Give me a hint."
"You will need your passport."
…
"This is a surprise!", Sarah exclaimed from the balcony with a great view of Eiffel tower. It is after midnight in Paris, and the nightlights are amazing. She closed her eyes and enjoyed a pleasant warm breeze which caressed her cheeks.
Aiden smiled happily seeing how excited Sarah is.
"I will order room service and we can rest for the night. You get to pick few places you want us to visit tomorrow during the day." Aiden embraced her from behind and spoke softly next to her ear: "In the evening, we will go for a walk there…", he pointed at the river Seine. "…before dinner there." His hand moved to point toward the top of Eiffel tower.
Sarah's eyes lit up from anticipation. "How long are we staying here?"
"As long as you wish."
Seeing that Sarah is almost glowing, Aiden is more than happy that he managed to get this suite on a short notice. When JoAnna told him that he needs to treat Sarah well, immediately few ideas popped into his mind.. As for not going over the top, that is relative.