Chapter 292: Peak filial piety! Richie sold his own biological father as merchandise?

Chapter 292: Chapter 292: Peak filial piety! Richie sold his own biological father as merchandise?

—?Omniscient Viewer’s Chat Lodge?—

Stelle: "This abstract music and animation- isn’t this the one I saw in my dream?"

March 7th: "Yes, it still sounds just as magically brainwashing."

Furina de Fontaine: "For a marketing class, why are they explaining these lyrics and animation?"

Furina de Fontaine: "Shouldn’t they be teaching how actually to sell things?"

Li Sushang: "I don’t get it. What on earth is this Fortune BananAdvisor trying to pull?"

....

『 [ Uh... because the little monkey’s life is very enviable. ]

Stelle, who was chosen to answer the question, was stunned at first, then spoke off the cuff.

[ Correct! ]

[ A happy life, that is the pain point of Penacony’s users! ]

[ Be they poor or rich, most people come to Penacony for a more meaningful life. ]

[ But once you stay in the dream for a while, you will find that this is an absolute empty promise. Dreamchasers will soon collapse from the constant toil, and tourists will also grow weary after one carnival after another. ]

[ The legendary wealthy merchants and superstar magnates we chase, their brilliant lives are so distant, as if belonging to another world... ]

[ But the Slumbering Banana Monkey showcases a brand new attitude towards life! ]

[ They sleep and eat bananas every day, thinking of nothing else and doing nothing else, experiencing the purest bliss of bananas! ]

[ To give you students a better experience, the Fortune BananAdvisor has prepared a special Slumbering Banana Monkey plushie for everyone. Students of the Fortune Academy can enjoy a discount on top of discounts when purchasing... ] 』

『 ....』

—?Omniscient Viewer’s Chat Lodge?—

Silver Wolf: "Holy cow, is it actually doing a live sales pitch on the spot?"

Stelle: "Three, two, one, bring up the link!"

Stelle: "I’m buying them all!"

Qingque: "The Slumbering Banana Monkey thinks of nothing?"

Qingque: "I don’t believe it."

Qingque: "Even for a little monkey, it must consider which bananas taste good and which ones don’t, right?"

Yunli: "If you put it that way, they also have to consider where it’s more comfortable to sleep."

Yanqing: "But even so, it really is much simpler than a human’s life."

Silver Wolf: "Might as well rename it the Slacking Banana Monkey."

March 7th: "Only students of the Fortune Academy can enjoy the discount on top of discounts?"

March 7th: "Oh no, none of us are students of the Fortune Academy."

Stelle: "?"

Stelle: "You actually want to buy them?"

Stelle: "If we get a couple more of those runaway monkeys, we really won’t be able to catch up!"

....

『 [ Profnana, the last batch of goods is already sold out. ]

Hearing the Fortune BananAdvisor mention stocking up, Richie hurriedly reminded him that the goods were long gone.

[ Excellent! ]

[ The popularity of the Slumbering Banana Monkey is far beyond our imagination. ]

[ Student Richie, come with the BananAdvisor to fetch the goods. ]

Fortune BananAdvisor nodded with a look of pleasant surprise, then led Richie away to fetch the new stock.

[ So promoting these plushies is a task of the Fortune Academy, but why make the students do this kind of thing? ]

Dan Heng looked in the direction they departed, lost in thought.

[ Bana, bana, bana... ]

The old slumbering banana monkey let out another decadent banana sound.

[ It’s a shame we don’t understand its Banagibberish... ]

[ ...I have an idea. Stelle, can you use Clockwork on it? ]

Dan Heng suddenly had an idea and wanted Stelle to try! 』

『 ....』

—?Omniscient Viewer’s Chat Lodge?—

Stelle: "Dan Heng, you genius!"

Stelle: "How did I not think of trying Clockwork on the Slumbering Banana Monkey?"

March 7th: "Eh?"

March 7th: "Using Clockwork on a plushie, does that really work?"

Dan Heng: "What if it isn’t actually a plushie?"

Lumine: "Mr. Dan Heng means... if Clockwork works, it would prove that this Slumbering Banana Monkey is highly likely a living creature!"

Dan Heng: "Although it cannot be confirmed one hundred percent, there is an extremely high probability."

Furina de Fontaine: "To actually see Clockwork being performed on a Slumbering Banana Monkey."

Furina de Fontaine: "That’s quite novel."

Paimon: "Come to think of it, the Slumbering Banana Monkeys we saw before, weren’t they all happy-go-lucky?"

Paimon: "Why is this one so depressed?"

Mualani: "Oh, right!"

Mualani: "Who says Slumbering Banana Monkeys don’t have sad thoughts?"

Mualani: "Isn’t this one very melancholy?"

Mualani: "That Fortune BananAdvisor is just talking absolute nonsense!"

Xilonen: "The problem is, isn’t this one currently defined as a plushie?"

Xilonen: "If it’s a real plushie, then it’s just designed that way."

....

『 [ I’ll give it a try, but will it have any effect? ]

Stelle looked at Dan Heng, a look of doubt on her face.

[ I don’t know, but through this, we can verify some hypotheses. ]

Dan Heng explained.

[ Clockwork Ninjutsu! ]

[ His Highness the Silvergun Shura once described its grand and profound mysteries to me. Please, I must witness it. ]

Upon hearing that Stelle was going to use Clockwork, Rappa immediately showed a very interested expression.

Stelle nodded, then walked up to the depressed monkey and began to use Clockwork on it, adjusting its mood to Calm.

[ Bana, bana-bana. ]

The effect of the Clockwork was instantaneous. The face of this depressed, old, slumbering banana monkey quickly returned to a peaceful state.

Then, it looked firmly in one direction and ran off at high speed! 』

『 ....』

—?Omniscient Viewer’s Chat Lodge?—

Xiangling: "Ah?!"

Xiangling: "It actually worked!"

Xiangling: "Doesn’t that mean this Slumbering Banana Monkey is highly likely not a plushie at all?"

Stelle: "I can’t understand how an inanimate object could be affected by Clockwork."

Stelle: "Combined with all the behaviors of this monkey, I conclude that it is alive!"

Furina de Fontaine: "Since it’s a living Slumbering Banana Monkey, why does the Fortune BananAdvisor insist on calling it a plushie?"

Furina de Fontaine: "Wouldn’t it be better to sell it as a pet?"

Furina de Fontaine: "They could even sell it for much more than a plushie!"

Qingque: "This is truly fishy in every aspect."

Qingque: "One thing is for sure, these BananAdvisor all have unspeakable secrets."

March 7th: "The monkey’s emotions have calmed down, so why is it still running away?"

Dan Heng: "No, this time it might not be running away, but trying to lead us somewhere."

Hu Tao: "I get it! It probably wants to take you to expose some shocking conspiracy!"

Hu Tao: "Now the truth is about to come to light!"

....

『 [ It worked. ]

[ It seems to be leading us somewhere. Let’s follow. ]

Dan Heng reminded the two beside him, then chased after the monkey.

[ Why does it feel like we’ve been chasing monkeys all day today... ]

Stelle shook her head and followed helplessly.

A moment later, they followed the monkey to a certain spot.

[ It’s the merchant ninja-disciple and the insectoid evil— ]

Rappa had already spotted Richie and the Fortune BananAdvisor in the distance.

[ Wait, let’s hear what they’re saying first. ]

Dan Heng stopped Rappa, who wanted to charge straight ahead, found a slightly hidden spot, and began to listen to the conversation between the two not far away.

[ Fortune BananAdvisor, didn’t you ask me to fetch the goods? ]

[ But there’s nothing here. ]

Richie looked at the empty surroundings and scratched his head, lost.

[ Geez, Dreamwaver BananAdvisor said he’d get a new batch ready. Looks like we can’t rely on him, bana tsk! ]

Fortune BananAdvisor sighed, quietly cursing the Dreamweaving BananAdvisor for being unreliable.

[ Speaking of which, BananAdvisor... ]

[ Are these people who turned into monkeys really doing so voluntarily...? ] 』

『 ....』

—?Omniscient Viewer’s Chat Lodge?—

Stelle: "Holy crap!"

Stelle: "What is this guy saying!?"

March 7th: "Are the people who turned into monkeys voluntary?!"

March 7th: "Oh my god, don’t tell me these Slumbering Banana Monkeys are all transformed from living human beings!"

Boothill: "Son of a nice lady, I knew it!"

Boothill: "This is not out of my expectations at all."

Furina de Fontaine: "Mr. Boothill already guessed it?"

Boothill: "In places where Dr. Primitive has been, if there weren’t humans turned into monkeys, that would be the real strange thing!"

Amber: "How detestable! This Richie really knows how to act. We actually thought he was in the dark!"

Lumine: "Selling monkeys that they clearly know are transformed humans as plushies..."

Lumine: "Unscrupulous merchants really only care about profit, without a shred of conscience."

Welt Yang: "A heinous act."

Himeko: "Do you remember what was written in the fanwork Mr. Boothill found earlier?"

Himeko: "It seems the people who went missing there were secretly turned into Slumbering Banana Monkeys."

Himeko: "Some have even been turned for months."

Hu Tao: "Terrifying. I can’t even imagine what it feels like to be turned into a monkey."

Paimon: "This Richie actually asked the BananAdvisor if these people were voluntary!"

Paimon: "Does he even need to ask?"

Paimon: "What normal person would want to be turned into a little monkey?"

Dr. Veritas Ratio: "Do not assume the thoughts of others."

Dr. Veritas Ratio: "It cannot be ruled out that some fools simply wish to return to the primitive state."

Aventurine: "That makes sense. After all, when the forest is big, there are all kinds of birds."

Aventurine: "This saying fits anywhere."

....

『 [ Of course, Richie. Can you not understand the happiness of being a monkey? ]

Fortune BananAdvisor asked back in a matter-of-fact tone.

[ I... indeed don’t quite understand. ]

Richie hesitated for a moment and shook his head.

[ It seems you haven’t been paying attention at all, or did those auditing students give you unrealistic illusions again? ]

[ But do you know the background of those Nameless? ]

[ You, a poor student who came all the way from an IPC-supported border planet to study here, want to compare yourself to them? ]

Fortune BananAdvisor mocked Richie for overestimating himself.

[ I know I can’t compare to those big shots... ]

[ But I also have things I want to do... ] 』

『 ....』

—?Omniscient Viewer’s Chat Lodge?—

Rappa: "Indeed, the merchant ninja-disciple was actually misled by the insectoid evil!"

Rappa: "I have seen this situation more than once!"

March 7th: "It’s quite similar to how that Dreamweaving BananAdvisor put down Chaletka."

March 7th: "Wait, speaking of that Dreamweaving BananAdvisor, did this Fortune BananAdvisor just mention him?"

Yunli: "This Fortune BananAdvisor is still waiting for the Dreamweaving BananAdvisor to secure the new batch of goods."

Yunli: "Without a doubt, the ’new goods’ in his mouth actually refer to you guys."

Furina de Fontaine: "It seems this Fortune BananAdvisor has absolutely no idea that the Dreamweaving BananAdvisor is already gone!"

Lumine: "But he knows Miss Stelle and the others’ identities."

Stelle: "What is our background as Nameless?"

Stelle: "I mean, we don’t really have any grand background behind us?"

Stelle: "We are very down-to-earth, okay!"

March 7th: "Um, does Pam count as our background?"

Pam: "Uh... as the Conductor, I would love to be a grand background for the passengers, but unfortunately, the Conductor’s fame in this galaxy is still a bit too shallow, Pam!"

Welt Yang: "Haha, actually, our greatest background as Nameless is our own capabilities."

Silver Wolf: "No lies detected. Hard power is the real background!"

....

『 [ Of course I know. You want to make money, a lot of money. ]

[ After all, the tuition of Paperfold University is an astronomical figure, far too expensive for an ordinary middle-class family-bana. ]

[ Oh, I heard your father came to Penacony with you. ]

[ He changed jobs and is working day and night at the Dawn Factory. Truly touching-bana. ]

Fortune BananAdvisor spoke words that made Richie’s face pale.

[ How, how do you know? ]

Richie was sure he had never told the Fortune BananAdvisor about this, but he actually knew.

[ Bana, bana, bana, because just a few days ago, he came here to see how you were doing. ]

[ I personally hosted your father. How pitiful, at such an age, to throw away most of his life’s savings to work in a place where he has no relatives. ]

[ I felt his exhaustion and anxiety... ]

[ So I conducted banacademics, guiding him to become a Slumbering Banana Monkey—right in the batch you just delivered, unexpected, isn’t it? ] 』

『 ....』

—?Omniscient Viewer’s Chat Lodge?—

Stelle: "OH MY!!!"

Stelle: "Don’t tell me the old slumbering banana monkey I spent money on is actually Richie’s dad?"

Stelle: "What kind of filial piety is this?!"

Silver Wolf: "This is a textbook case of filial piety."

Silver Wolf: "I see it now, this guy isn’t evil, just stupid."

March 7th: "I feel like he’s being completely manipulated by this Fortune BananAdvisor. He really is quite pitiful."

Qingque: "But a pitiful person must have something detestable about them!"

Qingque: "This can be considered reaping what he sowed!"

Li Sushang: "Setting aside how Richie is, just looking at this Fortune BananAdvisor, I think his face is even more detestable than that Dreamweaving Profnana!"

Guinaifen: "He is just pure evil..."

Rappa: "The merchant ninja-disciple was so utilized and insulted, and his family was reduced to bargaining chips!"

Rappa: "I cannot tolerate such behavior. I will surely make this detestable evil pay the price!"

....

『 [ What, what?! ]

[ How could you do this?! ]

Hearing this news, Richie felt as if struck by lightning, his mind completely dazed.

[ Bana... ]

In the distance, the old slumbering banana monkey hiding with Stelle and the others also let out a weak banana sound.

[ Could it be... the father of Ninja Initiate Merchant, Merchant Chief? ]

Rappa looked at the monkey and guessed his identity.

[ Why? ]

[ Because your father was too tired-bana. ]

[ I asked him if he ever regretted it, and he said no. ]

[ But when I tore away that layer of banana peel disguise, what I saw was that expulsion warning letter you hid. ]

[ Yes, how could I forget-bana, you are an irredeemable bad student. Rather than keeping you to waste teaching resources, it’s better to turn you into a product of the Fortune Academy. That way, you’ll still have some value, bana, bana, bana. ]

[ I promised your father that I would give you the same happiness. ]

[ Richie, it’s time to rest-bana. ]

Fortune BananAdvisor didn’t plan to waste more words. It prepared to turn Richie directly into a Slumbering Banana Monkey.

[ How, how could this be? ]

[ Dad, if even you have given up, then what am I staying here for... ]

[ ... ]

[ Dad, I can’t hold on anymore... ]

[ ...Bana. ] 』

『 ....』

—?Omniscient Viewer’s Chat Lodge?—

Dan Heng: "Not good, his mental willpower is collapsing!"

Dan Heng: "The BananAdvisor wants to turn him into a Slumbering Banana Monkey too!"

Stelle: "They’re not even pretending anymore, just doing it openly, huh?"

Stelle: "Good thing we saw it. Watch me beat the absolute crap out of this idiot!"

....