Chapter 301 - 279: A New Plan Part I

Chapter 301: Chapter 279: A New Plan Part I

The instant Li Ke heard those words, he knew someone had misunderstood. He spun around immediately and looked at the speaker.

"My apologies, I was talking about this guy. After all, no matter how you look at it, he must have been ruined by the waters of Jusenkyo."

Li Ke pointed at Ranma, whose life force hadn’t dropped in the slightest. Honestly, even if Li Ke himself were weakened to this extent and smashed into a mountain by a hammer that huge, he would be on the verge of death. Yet this Ranma only had a bit of a nosebleed and some scrapes on his face. He was ridiculously strong...

Ridiculously strong in every sense of the word.

However, upon seeing the young girl who had spoken, Li Ke’s eyes lit up.

The girl before him was dressed in traditional, simple attire, and her face was exceptionally bright and sharp. Strangely enough, despite her ability to swing an iron hammer the size of a pumpkin, her arms showed absolutely no trace of heavy muscle, which made Li Ke marvel silently at the unique martial arts principles of this world.

Feeling his gaze, the girl clicked her tongue in annoyance and pointed her hammer directly at him.

"Tch! Dare to say it but don’t dare to admit it? Men really are useless creatures!"

She was clearly irritated by his sudden appearance. To her, there was absolutely nothing strange about a panda appearing here. Even if they were a bit rare, everyone back home in Sichuan supposedly rode pandas to school! What was there to complain about?!

At that moment, Li Ke remembered who she was. This young girl had to be Shampoo.

Shampoo was the most outstanding martial artist among the new generation of the Joketsuzoku. In the original story, when Ranma and Genma were starving half to death, they broke into a martial arts tournament, ate her prize, and ended up dueling her. After Ranma won, she gave him the Kiss of Death, initiating a relentless pursuit based on her tribe’s ancient customs.

But right now, Li Ke looked at Ranma collapsed on the ground, and then at Genma, whom Misato Katsuragi was currently feeding chocolate to at some unknown point. He realized his arrival was incredibly timely. He had crossed over right before Shampoo and Ranma could ever form that ill-fated bond.

Seeing her fierce, stubborn expression, Li Ke found it somewhat amusing.

"So, you think I’m lying and plan to teach me a lesson?"

Shampoo nodded defiantly. With a righteous air, she lifted her hammer from Ranma’s side and pointed it straight at Li Ke.

"That’s right! You guy who looks down on women! If you have the guts, duel me!"

She was thoroughly displeased. In the Joketsuzoku, women held the supreme position of strength, and the strongest man of her generation was just an idiot who relied on hidden weapons, someone she could take down in two or three moves. She wasn’t about to let an outsider slide.

"Ah, let’s get things straight first," Li Ke replied, raising his hands slightly. "I really didn’t mean it that way, and I’ve already apologized. If you insist on being relentless..."

Li Ke’s expression turned serious.

"If you’re defeated by me, you’ll end up pregnant! And you’ll only be one of the mothers of my children! That’s right! I’m building a harem!"

He was completely serious!

If Shampoo really intended to lecture him over a careless remark, then just like with Sailor Moon, he would make sure she truly understood the meaning of regret!

"Harem man..."

The look Shampoo gave Li Ke grew even more disgusted.

Even in ancient times, the Joketsuzoku never shared a husband with other girls. In this day and age, someone actually dared to talk about building a harem, and right in front of the Joketsuzoku at that!

If this wasn’t an outright provocation, what was?!

"To say such things in front of the Joketsuzoku, are you ready to die?!"

Without the slightest hesitation, she swung her hammer, smashing it fiercely toward Li Ke’s head.

With a slight tilt of his body, he easily dodged her massive, heavy strike.

The massive hammer slammed violently into the ground, blasting open a large crater. Li Ke couldn’t help but click his tongue in amazement. Creating a crater like that would be rather troublesome for him using pure brute strength without his flames, yet she had done it so effortlessly!

"As expected of a gag manga..."

He muttered under his breath while dodging. Whether it was Ranma’s absurd life force and defense, or Shampoo’s excessive offensive power, it all proved that these people were far from weak.

"Are you calling me a joke?!"

Failing to catch his exact meaning, she swung her other hammer in a swift horizontal sweep aimed directly at his face. However, in the eyes of his highly enhanced reflexes, this level of speed was hardly anything to write home about. He extended his palm without a second thought, catching her wrist on the fly and forcing the heavy iron hammer to a dead halt right before his face.

"You’d better stop right now. This is my final warning as a harem man."

He was issuing this ultimatum in absolute seriousness. After all, Shampoo was a character he genuinely liked. If it had been that Sailor Moon doing this, she would already be bent over taking a pounding by now.

"In your dreams!"

Shampoo threw a punch with her free hand instead. Seeing that this girl refused the carrot and preferred the stick, Li Ke had no choice but to casually shove her chest.

She felt as though she had been hit by a runaway truck and was sent flying backward instantly. The iron hammers slipped from her hands and soared through the air. One landed squarely on the head of Genma, who was just about to lick the chocolate from Misato Katsuragi’s hand, while the other hit the newly conscious Ranma right on the noggin.

Genma collapsed immediately, and Ranma was once again buried in the rubble. Yet, this impact—which would have shattered the skull of any normal person—merely left large bumps on their heads, failing to even knock them unconscious.

Meanwhile, Shampoo stared in utter shock at the rapidly receding figure of Li Ke. She couldn’t help but recall the warning he had just given her.

She had already known he was powerful, which was why she had attempted a preemptive strike. But she never imagined he would be strong to such a terrifying extent!

She couldn’t track his attack at all, and she was completely powerless to resist his strength.

But just as she watched his figure, with the back of her head about to slam violently into the ground, Li Ke vanished from her sight once more. The next moment, she found herself falling into a warm embrace.

"I told you, if you fight me, you have to be prepared to get pregnant."

Li Ke cradled the back of Shampoo’s head with one hand while supporting her legs with the other. Looking down at the embroidered shoes on her feet, he couldn’t help but chuckle softly.

Shampoo stared blankly up at him, her beautiful large eyes filled with utter bewilderment. She still hadn’t fully processed his terrifyingly high level of strength.

Looking down at her, Li Ke instinctively realized one thing.

Playing hard to get.

Though he didn’t know exactly how he arrived at this conclusion, he decided to trust his instincts. Given her relatively low strength level, he didn’t intend to have her fight alongside him anyway. He stood up, released the still-dazed girl, and lightly tapped her on the head.

"I have to admit, you are very beautiful. So, have you thought about what we should name our first child? Also, listen to people next time. Since I said there was something off about them, it proves I know these two. Now go on home, little girl, and stop causing trouble."

Li Ke didn’t look back at her. Instead, he walked straight over to Ranma, who was just crawling back up, and Misato Katsuragi, who was currently drawn to the collapsed panda and hesitating over whether to pet it. He grabbed her collar and pulled her back, breaking the trance the panda had cast over her.

"That guy is a middle-aged uncle, Miss Katsuragi."

Casually summoning his flames, Li Ke ignited a patch of bushes. With a simple wave of his hand, countless water droplets floated up from the ground, passed through his flames, and splashed over the two unfortunate souls.

The next moment, the large furry panda instantly transformed into a shady-looking uncle wearing a bandana, while the red-haired girl turned into a robust, black-haired young man.

"Oh, oh, oh!! Fantastic! I’m finally back to normal!"

Feeling the sudden change in his body, Genma Saotome—having changed back from a panda—shouted instantly in wild excitement. The previously half-dead Ranma Saotome also snapped awake at this moment.

Seeing the pathetic display of these two, Li Ke’s lips twitched. He casually retrieved two loaves of bread from his backpack and tossed one to each of them.

In the very next instant...

"Mine!"

"Mine!!"

The two Saotomes immediately punched each other square in the face. They didn’t hesitate to bite down on the exact same piece of bread with their mouths while fighting over the other loaf with their hands!

They punched and kicked each other relentlessly, each trying to force the other to give up so they could enjoy both loaves of bread all to themselves. Li Ke even watched as the father and son unhesitatingly kicked each other right in the face!

The entire chaotic scene could only be described by one phrase.

Stray dogs fighting over food.

Misato was completely dumbfounded. She had genuinely thought it was a wholesome duo consisting of a beautiful girl training alongside a giant panda. She hadn’t taken Li Ke’s warning about Jusenkyo seriously at all. But seeing the cute panda that had just been acting adorable to beg for her chocolate suddenly turn into a sleazy uncle, her brain’s processor completely crashed!

"This... Li Ke, this..."

Her mouth hung wide open. She genuinely did not know what to say. The mere thought that she had almost petted a middle-aged uncle made her desperately wish for a time machine!

Even though she hadn’t actually touched him, the cuteness she had felt just moments ago kept morphing into the image of that sleazy uncle, dealing an unimaginable shock to her nervous system!

"I told you we were already very close to Jusenkyo, yet you still didn’t pay attention."

Li Ke really couldn’t bear to look at the father and son anymore, especially since the two were now practically barking at each other like dogs. He unhesitatingly threw out a few more loaves of bread, finally putting an end to this comedic display of domestic violence.

However, once the duo finished eating and drinking, Li Ke truly witnessed just how fast these two could change their faces.

The guys who had just behaved like a pair of vicious, starving wolves were now putting on a display of utmost etiquette. They didn’t even hesitate to throw themselves onto the ground, performing a full prostration right before them!

"Thank you both for saving our lives! If it weren’t for your rescue, we probably would have died here!"

Genma looked at Li Ke and Misato with absolute seriousness—especially Misato. If it hadn’t been for the chocolate she provided, he undoubtedly would have been beaten to a pulp by Ranma earlier!

"Thank you very much for the bread," Ranma added, getting straight to the point about their financial situation. "But we don’t have any money on us. So if there’s something you need us to do, it’s best to say it clearly. As for paying you back, we absolutely don’t have a single cent."

He made their plight perfectly clear. They weren’t wealthy travelers who simply couldn’t find a place to buy food; they were completely broke and had genuinely been on the verge of starving to death out here.

"That doesn’t really matter..."

Li Ke looked at Ranma Saotome, then at Genma, and couldn’t help but ask about his confusion.

"How did you two manage to end up like this? With your skills, it’s not like you can’t even catch a rabbit, right? Even if you worked odd jobs, you shouldn’t look like starving ghosts."

He was genuinely puzzled. With the strength these two possessed, this kind of problem shouldn’t have occurred at all. How did they fall to this point?

"Well... it’s mainly because of the language barrier, and the rabbits and things around here were already eaten clean by us. Plus, because we don’t speak the language and have no money, our relationship with the local people isn’t very good..."

Ranma spoke up, looking embarrassed.

Li Ke was completely speechless. Daring to come here without a guide despite not knowing the local language, they really weren’t afraid of death.

"Then wild vegetables..."

"Last time, we accidentally ate poisonous mushrooms, so we didn’t dare try again."

"..."

Li Ke couldn’t help but cover his face, unable to resist letting out a complaint.

"You two really are something else!"

He was merely complaining, but the father and son nodded happily.

"Benefactor, you truly have a discerning eye! The two of us are indeed rare martial arts geniuses in this world! However, we hid this news very well. How did you know, benefactor?"

"..."

He really wanted to tell them to get lost, but at the thought that he could change the storyline for these two, he couldn’t help but speak up.

"Think whatever you want. But looking at you, you must have been cursed by Jusenkyo. So, do you want to go to Jusenkyo together with us to return to normal?"

Li Ke didn’t ask anything else. He was genuinely afraid of being driven mad by these two fools, so he stated the situation directly, intending to take them to Jusenkyo.

"No, sir. Although we also want to solve our problem, Jusenkyo hasn’t had any water all year round recently. To be precise, the Spring of Drowned Man hasn’t had water all year, so even if we go, it won’t make any sense."

Genma’s eyes were full of tears. As he spoke, he couldn’t even help but wipe his eyes with his dirty sleeve.

"So even if we go over there, it’s completely pointless!"

Hearing this, Ranma beside him also couldn’t help but wipe his eyes with his sleeve, shedding the same sorrowful tears.

At this time, he was still a proper man. He hadn’t yet become shameless because of female privileges or from interacting with people as a female, nor had he habitually adapted to living as a woman.

Right now, he truly regarded this thing as a curse!

Though it indeed was a curse!

Ah, this...