Imperfect Desires

*Flashback Continued*

Destiny didn't know where she was brought, she only knew that she had to escape. And she did try with all her might! However, it was all useless and she had only drained her own energy. Nothing else. In the end, she was still the one at a disadvantage.

She felt cold fingers touching her face and tried to turn her head but the person pinched her chin with those cold fingers and sneered, "Do you think this struggle is gonna get you anywhere?"

The tape on her lips was removed and Destiny laughed out, "You finally decided to come out of your hole? It was you! You had been playing this game with me all this time."

There was pin-drop silence around her and then she heard, "Open her blindfold."

Destiny couldn't instantly open her eyes but when she did, her eyes widened. "You? How could it be you?" The person before her was the last person she'd be doubting. Then how come this least expected person was right now before her? Her eyes sharpened, "Were you behind all of this? Ms. Xin Suyin?"

Xin Suyin didn't seem to have the same domineering aura around her as she did yesterday facing Chen Xiu. Currently, she was rather drained. She seemed really numb right now. She had just faced the worst defeat of her life. How could she still hold on to the same arrogance when every single cell in her body was in shambles?

She didn't even get angry at Destiny as she said, "This is not how you should be talking to your savior."

"Savior?" repeated Destiny. She snorted, "And how did you save me?"

Xin Suyin turned to look at her face and said, "I warned you. I warned you repeatedly not to dig your grave again." She shook her head, "The mastermind behind all of this had already considered you dead on the night you were born. Why did you have to turn up alive after 16 years? When people already accepted your death, why did you have to seek death all over again?"

"What are you trying to say?" Destiny's attention was now on solely Xin Suyin.

"If you hadn't reached out to Zemin, you'd have easily lived a simple life. But you chose, not to." Xin Suyin sighed out, "Your impulsiveness gave a reason to that mastermind to use you. You vanished into thin air and that intrigued us all. Clearly, you're very young and yet you managed to destroy all the tracks of Destiny Novell's existence. But you underestimated your opponent. Because just as eager you were to find the culprit behind Carina Novell's death, just as eager that person was to trap you."

Destiny's eyes darkened. She gave away her own tracks.

"If you had not called Zemin last night, we wouldn't have found you," said Xin Suyin. "But you little girl are very eager for death."

"You want to kill me? Will that solve everything? If yes, please kill me already. I don't have any attachment to this life."

Xin Suyin's brows arched slightly, "If I wanted you dead, you'd be dead by now."

Destiny scoffed, "Then what? You want to make my life a living hell like the typical villain?" She gave a self-abasing laugh as she added, "You've already done that though. I've to live with the guilt of trying to kill my mother every day for the rest of my life now!"

"Trying? You've already killed her. I heard her condition isn't very optimistic."

Destiny's heart sank even more, along with it dropped her desire for anything else. 

"Then do me a favor and please end this life of mine."

Xin Suyin looked at Destiny and stayed quiet for a long moment before she opened her mouth to say, "Do you know for the longest time I actually thought you're Zemin's illegitimate child?" Destiny's eyes widened. "The idea of Zemin cheating on Zhao Huan sounded so natural that I never questioned it. Or I just didn't want to. Do you know why?"

Obviously, she wasn't getting an answer from Destiny.

"I've never believed in love. Even the strongest of love breaks in the tides of life. I always believed in possession, if you can't get it, snatch it. If it can't be yours, end it. Maybe this is why I felt really happy knowing that Zemin cheated on his wife. It made my belief stronger that no relationship can be perfect." She closed her eyes and sat down at the windowsill. "But only recently I got to know that he never cheated on his wife. He really had been a loyal person. It really made me angry. I couldn't help it. I couldn't stop my jealousy from burning into anger. You're just taking the burnt of it now."

Destiny's eyes were complicated before it turned frosty, "Your point is?"

Xin Suyin looked at Destiny's face. The girl before her had piercings, tattoos, disheveled hair that hid half of her face. It had always been like this. She really couldn't see the image of either Xin Zemin or Zhao Huan in her. All she saw was a rebellious brat trying to claw anything or everything.

She exhaled a long breath and said, "You won't get it. You're really young." Then she stood up and turned to leave before instructing her people, "Drop her off wherever she wants to go."

Destiny was taken aback, "You're not gonna kill me?"

"I can't kill someone who is already dead," started Xin Suyin. "You died the moment you realized what you did to your own mother. I don't think there is another worse way to die."

"Do you think if you let me go today, I won't come back to take my revenge?"

"You can try that little girl but I'd advise you against it. Your fight had never been with me. This time if you showed up, even I won't be able to save you."

Destiny watched her leave with a very calm face. After tossing and turning she had come to one realization, she had already done an unpardonable crime. Whether she stayed alive or died, it didn't matter. Nothing could wash the blood off of her hands in this life. She'd be just a sinner.

*End of Flashback*