Imperfect Desires

Yan Ying turned her head to see who knocked at the window before her eyes slightly narrowed down. Unlocking the door, she alighted and came to stand before the person whose eyes were trained on him all this while.

"Hey, Jini! What a pleasant surprise!"

The person before her scowled at the nickname before his hand lifted to smack her hand but she skillfully dodged it while laughing, "Aiyo, our Jini still has a temper." Seeing how the tips of his eyebrows twitched she stopped herself from teasing him further. "But on a serious note, Zhou Jinhai, what are you doing here?"

Zhou Jinhai's brows quirked up slightly as he questioned, "Ms. Know-it-all doesn't know that I live here?" Ying shook her head. "That's a little hard to believe."

"Now, you can't say that. I know a lot of things but I really didn't know you had been living here, right beside Dylan."

Zhou Jinhai smiled at her knowingly, "But I didn't even mention that I live beside Dylan. How did you come to that conclusion?"

Ying coughed since she was caught now. She smiled sheepishly at him, "Ok, I might have heard a thing or two." She leaned against the side of her car and he also came to stand beside her as he offered a cup to her. "I'm not in the mood for coffee."

"It's milk tea," he replied and Ying didn't even take a second before grabbing it. He shook his head at her eagerness before he voiced out, "Xiaoli is getting married."

Ying's hand paused slightly before she went back to sipping on her favorite milk tea. "You're talking as if I don't know that."

"I know that you also are aware of it. My purpose for bringing it up is to ask whether you're okay with it or not?"

"Will anything changes if I'm not okay with it?" retorted Ying as her eyes glanced at him.

"No, I guess nothing will change," he mumbled softly. He was silent for a minute before he spoke again, "Are you gonna attend the wedding?"

"How can I not?" 

He glared at her, "Have you lost your mind? Why do you want to hurt yourself like this?"

"Ha!" Ying rolled her eyes at him as she went on, "The pot is calling the kettle black?" Zhou Jinhai's expressions shifted as she added, "Are you forgetting that once upon a time, you also hurt someone like that on purpose? You also called a girl to your wedding when you knew she was madly in love with you. Didn't you also do it to hurt her?"

His hands clenched as he closed his eyes and breathed out, "I did. I hurt her so that she could move on. I pushed her as far as I could possibly do at that time. But that's the reason why I don't want you to suffer as she did. Because it took me a while to realize that while I was trying to push her away, I broke her." He took a pause before adding, "I don't want you to break in this process as well."

Ying looked ahead blankly. There was nothing about Zhou Jinhai's past or present that she wasn't familiar with. In fact, she was also one of the few who knew that Zhou Jinhai and Darren had fallen for the same person. And that person had ended her life herself. She knew every aspect of that story but she always acted like she knew nothing. 

"Even if I cut-off from Xiaoli, don't forget that I can't walk away from Zizi. He is like a father. No, he is my second father. He practically raised me. I can't bring myself to walk away from him." Zhou Jinhai's gaze was complicated. "But you can relax. I'm strong. I'm not that easy to break. It's just a wedding, it won't hurt me."

"Liar!" he didn't hide his thoughts making her face twitch. 

Ying suddenly chuckled out of nowhere. "Isn't it weird that after growing up, all of us drifted apart?" Zhou Jinhai furrowed his brows as she went on, "There was a time when Dylan, Darren, and you were unwilling to even stay apart. There was also a time when I was always hovering around Xiaoli who was, in turn, hovering around Meihui. It's strange how none of us even turn to each other anymore."

"Wrong! Dylan and Darren are still stuck together, I'm the one pushed aside. Meanwhile, Meihui and Xiaoli are getting married, and you're the one who is pushed aside."

"Wow! Such a coincidence that both of us are pushed aside."

Zhou Jinhai squinted his eyes at Ying who still had the mood of joking around. He looked deep in thought. 

"Do you have something to say?" asked Ying as she noticed his expression.

"I need your help but something tells me you won't be helping me."

"I could do it considering the fact that we grew up together but I won't."

Zhou Jinhai laughed at her, "I know. You don't want to help because of Darren. It's alright."

"Actually, it has nothing to do with your younger brother," stated Ying making him puzzled. "As I said, we grew up together. I only met Darren when he was struggling mentally. By just that fact, I'm more inclined to help you than him."

"But you still don't want to?" Zhou Jinhai knew how loyal Ying was. If she fixed her heart on someone, she'd stay devoted. No matter the nature of the relationship. Love, friendship, cordiality, or respect, she never shied away from paying her devotion where it was due.

"Actually, your younger brother has a girlfriend. And I have taken a liking to her."

Zhou Jinhai almost choked on air as he hit her shoulder, "Choose your words wisely. Or you'll bring trouble to yourself."

"What are you thinking about?" Ying scowled at him. "I mean to say that she has managed to invoke those elder sisterly feelings inside of me. I didn't even know I had those feelings within me. I just want to squish her, she is so adorable."

"You're talking as if you're talking about a kid."

"Well, you're not wrong," began Ying suggestively. "Her personality is a basically a mix between a needy 5-year-old child who can't control her emotions whenever she is around the person she loves, a teenage rebel who makes poor life decisions by trying to bring happiness in everyone's life and an 80-year-old woman who's tired and needs a nap all the bloody time."

Zhou Jinhai laughed at her description as he said, "No wonder, she managed to enthrall my younger brother."