Chapter 2 I Can Shop Too?

The dorms of the Flowing Wind Sect’s outer division looked less like a mystical sanctuary for immortal cultivators and more like a high density apartment complex. Rows of drab, gray brick dormitories stretched across the lower mountainside, crowded with teenage disciples desperately trying to compress worldly spiritual energy into their bellies.

Lin Feng hummed a cheerful, off key tune as he strolled down the narrow corridor of Dormitory Block C. His hands were tucked comfortably into his wide sleeves, his posture so relaxed it practically radiated disrespect to anyone passing by.

[Ding]

[Current available Rage Points: 148.]

[ Would the Host finally like to initialize the System Shop?]

Initialize it, Lin Feng thought, completely unfazed by his own mind software’s attitude. Show me the budget options.

A translucent interface expanded in front of his eyes. Unlike the grand, golden treasure vaults you read about in novels, the Master Ragebaiting System’s shop looked suspiciously like an online discount storefront.

?? SYSTEM SHOP (NOVICE TIER)

[Artifact: The Loudmouth Megaphone (Price: 50 RP)]

(Description: A spiritual artifact that amplifies the user’s voice across a three mile radius)

[ Pill: Double Salt Recovery Candy (Price: 30 RP)]

( Description: Instantly heals superficial bruises, but leaves an incredibly bitter taste in the user’s mouth that makes them look they’ve eaten shit for two hours.)

[Talisman: The Ghostly Waving Hand (Price: 100 RP)]

(Description: Deploys a spectral, glowing hand behind a defeated or frustrated opponent that waves goodbye to their dignity. Deals massive emotional damage)

Lin Feng’s eyes lingered on the Ghostly Waving Hand. It was an exact replica of the frantic, two handed farewell gesture the original owner of his body had given him before fleeing to the higher realms.

Beautiful, Lin Feng thought, his heart warming with pure joy. I’m definitely saving up for that one.

Before he could browse any further, he reached the door marked Room 404. He pushed it open, expecting a quiet place to sit down and try out his newly installed Basic Qi Circulation Technique.

Instead, he was immediately greeted by the sight of a scrawny boy frantically packing a canvas sack with low grade spirit stones, dry rations, and three pairs of identical gray undergarments.

The boy froze, and his eyes widen like bullseye with absolute terror as he stared at Lin Feng.

"L-Lin Feng!You’re alive?! I mean—why are you here?! You need to run! Right now!"

Lin Feng blinked, checking the memory files left behind by his body’s previous tenant. This jittery creature was Lu Cang, his current roommate. Lu Cang’s entire cultivation philosophy could be summarized in three words. Don’t hit me. He was a professional coward who survived in the Flowing Wind Sect by essentially blending into the background.

"Calm down, Little Lu," Lin Feng said, casually walking over to his own wooden cot and flopping onto it face first.

"Why would I run? The weather is nice, the air is clean, and the locals are extremely generous providers of spiritual energy."

"Generous?!" Lu Cang squeaked, his voice hitting an octave that only spiritual beasts could hear. "

You shoved Zhao Feng into a mud puddle! Half the outer sect saw it! Word is already spreading to the Senior Disciples of the Tiger Claw Faction! They’re saying you’ve contracted a some disease and are actively looking to commit suicide!"

[Ding]

[Roommate Lu Cang is experiencing severe vicarious anxiety He is terrified your stupidity will get him killed by association.]

[Rage Value +12.]

Lin Feng sat up, his eyes sparkling. Wow. I can even harvest points from someone just being stressed out near me. This system is incredibly versatile.

"Lu Cang, look at my eyes. Do I look like a man who wants to die?" Lin Feng said, leaning forward with a deeply serious, comforting expression.

Lu Cang squinted at him. "You look like a man who drank heavily from the forbidden mountain spring"

"Exactly. Absolute confidence," Lin Feng grinned, cracking his knuckles.

"Don’t pack your bags. Stay right here. I promise you, by tomorrow morning, Zhao Feng won’t even be looking at you. He’ll be far too busy trying to figure out how to murder me."

"That doesn’t make me feel better!" Lu Cang wailed, hugging his canvas sack like a shield.

Before Lu Cang could spiral into a complete nervous breakdown, a loud, echoing bronze gong resonated across the entire mountain range. The sound vibrated through the floorboards of the dormitory.

GONNNNGGG.

Lu Cang gasped, his face draining of what little color it had left.

"The morning lecture! Elder Iron Face is teaching the Morning Dao Theory class today! If you miss it, you get lashed! If you go, Zhao Feng and his faction will be waiting for you in the courtyard!"

Lin Feng’s eyes lit up like a kid on Christmas morning. A giant hall filled with hundreds of stuck up, easily offended teenagers and a strict, angry teacher? It was an all you can eat buffet of pure, unadulterated Aggro Points.

"A lecture? Brilliant.Lead the way, Little Lu. Let’s go get educated." Lin Feng said, jumping off his bed and smoothing out his wrinkled outer disciple robes.