I Don't Want To Be Loved

Chapter 67: Pleasure of Desire

Igor’s brows tightened and he scoffed. He wished his mother would reveal her true intentions. Maybe he’ll not despise her this much. He despised it so, despised the false image she gave – a mother who refused evil and gave up her throne so her son could live. This was her image. But it was false. It was her ambition. The world was her theatre and she the main lead in the play.

Igor and the woman he’s to marry would become prey in the palm of her hands.

“Are you satisfied, mother? You’ve managed to keep my limbs, my hands, and feet all tied down. Are you musing in your own enjoyment?”

“What do you mean? Rihannan is a good girl. She’s the best match for you, Igor. I don’t know why you keep distorting my words.”

“That’s exactly what I thought my mother would say.”

Igor scoffed and clicked his tongue, swiveling his feet and walking toward the door. And then he saw her… he saw Rihannan standing at the front door, her face a pale white. He surmised that she had heard their conversation and he was ashamed, but… this was something she would know soon, and now that she was living here, she’ll need to realize this world was no fairytale with a happy ending.

“It’s something you should know anyway. It’s good. Now there’s nothing to hide. You will have to choose soon. Will you trust me, or will you remain by her side and under her protection?”

Her face was ashen and bleached with white. He had pushed her too far ahead of the marriage… this revelation was too sudden for her, this Igor knew, but it was better for her. As time passes, she’ll understand why he said this and why she should never trust the Queen.

***

The wedding ceremony ended and night came. The newly wedded king and queen would consummate in marriage during their first time. Igor thought this custom unpleasant. Such old and traditional customs that had all but disappeared remained in Arundell. Their neighboring kingdom, Crichton, chose to eradicate the customs too. Nobles were not to interfere with the royal’s fornication, but in Arundell, this was not the case.

Igor gnashed his teeth. “When I have strength, I’ll remove this age-old custom.”

He was furious that nothing could be done on his end.

Knowing the truth of his mother’s true colors, he saw those nobles as nothing but beasts that enjoyed watching intimate acts of pleasure and love. And so he intended to hold their first consummation of marriage and quickly kick them out. Though that did not mean he did not have his own sexual thoughts.

He knew a woman’s first time was painful and Basil, in particular, advised him that he give his bride maximum consideration on their first night.

And he would do that.

But each time he closed his eyes in the dark, he dreamed of her. He was lost, his pent-up desire gradually simmering as he stripped off his robes. He looked at her, stroked her soft skin slowly and caressed her cheek. She was beautiful and much softer than he imagined. The feel of her smooth skin clinging onto him enchanted him. He’s sure he’d become a prisoner to her beauty. She took his breath away. Her naked form was sirenic and enthralling. He leaned forward and pressed his lips deeply against her soft skin. Her scent was sweet. It was not perfume but her natural scent.

‘Is this how women smell?’

His mind grew dizzy and he felt hot.

The moment he kissed her mountainous peaks was when he fell to the pleasure of desire.

But it was only a dream and this dream could never amount to reality.