Chapter 75: Bewildered? Yan Luoxi: Scumbag, It’s You or Me Today!

Chapter 75: Chapter 75: Bewildered? Yan Luoxi: Scumbag, It’s You or Me Today!

"Xiaomeng, what nonsense are you talking about!"

Su Qianqian couldn’t help but roll her eyes at her roommate and best friend.

"Nonsense?"

"Look at what you’ve done to my poor Peppa!"

Guo Xiaomeng rolled her eyes back at her and said irritably, "So, spill. What did our dear Handsome Gu do to you this time?"

"Uh..."

Hearing her best friend’s words, Su Qianqian suddenly didn’t know how to begin.

"Did you two get into a fight?"

"No, wait a minute."

"Speaking of which, didn’t you just go to Gu Yizhou’s place a little while ago?"

Guo Xiaomeng said, seeing that her friend wasn’t speaking.

"We didn’t."

Su Qianqian gently shook her head.

She thought for a moment, then said, "Xiaomeng, I have this friend... uh... it really is a friend of mine!"

"So, my friend and a guy she likes had this really embarrassing thing happen. The guy wanted to apologize, but my friend blocked him. After that, he never contacted her again, and he didn’t try to apologize to her in person. Do you think he’s angry? Or does it mean he doesn’t actually like her and just couldn’t care less?"

"Uh-huh?"

Guo Xiaomeng’s eyes lit up.

"A classic case of ’asking for a friend’!"

"Now *this* is a topic that has my full attention!"

"Let me tell you, that guy is a total scumbag!"

"He’s playing hard to get!"

...

"ACHOO!"

In the Binjiang No.1 Mansion District, Gu Yizhou was sitting on his living room sofa, petting his little white cat, Xiaobai.

The sneeze came without warning, spraying saliva all over Xiaobai’s face!

Yan Luoxi, who had been blissfully enjoying Gu Yizhou’s pets, snapped her eyes open.

Her large, sapphire-blue eyes were now filled with shock!

The man and the cat stared at each other, eyes wide.

"Uh..."

Gu Yizhou said awkwardly, "Sorry, Xiaobai, I didn’t mean to. Hang on, I’ll go get a tissue to wipe you off."

He was about to get up as he spoke.

"MREOW~!!!"

Yan Luoxi snapped back to reality. She looked down at the saliva on her fur. As a notorious germaphobe, she was on the verge of a complete meltdown!

’AHHH!!!’

’You damn Gu Yizhou! You bastard! You’re so dead!!!’

She let out a piercing shriek, leaped up from the sofa, pounced onto Gu Yizhou, and went to bite his butt!

"Hsss..."

As Xiaobai’s claws snagged the seat of his pants, Gu Yizhou’s sphincter clenched. He whipped his head around just in time to see the little white cat opening its small, pink mouth to take a bite out of his behind!

"Hey, Xiaobai, what do you think you’re doing?!"

Gu Yizhou yelped in alarm.

But Yan Luoxi was already beside herself with rage. She paid him no mind and lunged straight for his butt!

’I’m going to bite this bastard to death!’

"MREOW~!!!"

Seeing that his butt was about to be bitten, Gu Yizhou’s sphincter clenched again, and he quickly jerked his hips forward.

"Holy shit!"

"Xiaobai, have you lost your mind?!"

He shouted at the little white cat in terror.

Yan Luoxi’s bite met only air.

Her claws were still hooked tightly into Gu Yizhou’s pants. Missing her bite only made her even more furious!

’That’s right!’

’I’ve lost my mind!’

’Damn right I’ve lost my mind!!!’

’You bastard, I’m going to end you today!’

’Only one of us is leaving this room alive!!!’

She recklessly lunged at Gu Yizhou’s butt again.

But this time, Gu Yizhou knew what she was after. He quickly reached out, grabbed Xiaobai by the scruff of her neck, and lifted her into the air.

Grabbed by the scruff of her neck—the great equalizer of all felines—Yan Luoxi’s movements froze for an instant!

The next second, she began to struggle wildly!

"MEOW~!"

"HISS~!"

"Whimper..."

’Let me go!’

’You damn animal, you bastard, this world isn’t big enough for the both of us!!’

"You piece of #$%^&*..."

She cursed at Gu Yizhou, struggling wildly all the while.

Driven mad with rage, she instinctively resorted to the language of her fellow felines, letting loose a torrent of curses.

Gu Yizhou couldn’t understand a word, but from her savage expression and frantic thrashing, he could tell she was cursing him out something awful.

"Uh..."

"Xiaobai, calm down!"

Knowing he was in the wrong, an embarrassed Gu Yizhou quickly tried to explain, "Look... I really didn’t do it on purpose!"

"GROWL~!"

’Like I care whether it was on purpose or not!’

Yan Luoxi snarled at him, baring her teeth.

"Hey, you silly little cat, I already told you it wasn’t on purpose!"

Seeing Xiaobai acting as if this was a fight to the death, Gu Yizhou said helplessly, "It was just a bit of saliva on your face. It’s not like it was snot. I can just wipe it clean for you, is there any need to get so worked up?"

That was the worst possible thing he could have said. Hearing it only made Yan Luoxi even more furious!

"MROW~!"

’You damn animal!’

’How dare you... ptui! How dare you spray me in the face! I’m not finished with you!!!’

Yan Luoxi whipped her head around and bit Gu Yizhou.

"Ow~!"

Gu Yizhou cried out in pain. Caught off guard, his grip loosened, and Yan Luoxi took the chance to wrestle free from his grasp.

Once free from his demonic clutches, Yan Luoxi had barely touched the floor before she lunged at Gu Yizhou again.

Gu Yizhou was busy inspecting the bite mark. Thankfully, it was only red and hadn’t broken the skin!

"Holy shit!"

"Xiaobai, you’re actually trying to hurt me?!"

He yelled upon seeing her charge.

He dodged to the side, narrowly avoiding Yan Luoxi’s attack!

This only enraged Yan Luoxi further. She changed direction and charged at Gu Yizhou again.

Gu Yizhou knew he couldn’t just stand there and take it. He started running, weaving between the living room sofa and the dining table to evade her.

’What choice did I have?!’

’The silly little cat had gone completely nuts!!!’

’If he didn’t run and she caught him, that silly little cat would tear him to shreds!’

And so, the man and the cat raced around the living room—one chasing, one fleeing, one pouncing, one dodging—in a scene that looked exactly like a game of cat and mouse!

...

「An hour later.」

At the dining table, Gu Yizhou stood at one end, and Yan Luoxi was at the other.

Man and cat were locked in a standoff across the table.

Both were glaring at the other, eyes wide.

It couldn’t be helped!

They had been chasing each other for a solid hour. Even Gu Yizhou, whose constitution had been modified by the System after drinking a small blue vial of genetic fluid, was now panting slightly!

As for Yan Luoxi, she was so exhausted she was on the verge of collapse. If it weren’t for the single-minded desire to bite Gu Yizhou to death that was keeping her going, she would have already surrendered!

’Damn it!’

’I’m so tired I’m about to collapse with my tongue hanging out, but this bastard Gu Yizhou looks like he’s barely broken a sweat!’

’Is he some kind of monster?!’

’Then again!’

’I guess I wasn’t wrong to call him a bastard. He really does have the stamina of an animal!’

Yan Luoxi cursed frantically in her mind.

...