His Rui

The carriage ran on the silent road.

The inside of the carriage was as silent as its outside.

There was something different about the atmosphere that even Xi Ying could not point out.

What was different?

While coming to Li Manor, he knew …he knew that it was Li Rui's wariness for him that made the atmosphere a little different but this time it was different from last time.

His eyes unconsciously went to the person sitting in the far corner of his side.

He could only see her long hair that was flowing down till her waist. She was still looking out of the window silently.

Xi Ying moved his eyes away reluctantly as he suddenly thought of whatever he said inside the study room.

Did it affect her even a little bit?

"So Lord knows that the truth of four years ago?"

Xi Ying heard the question and swiftly turned his eyes to look at Li Rui who was also looking at him at this moment.

Her clean black eyes were still calm not giving away anything what she was thinking exactly.

"Yes"

He whispered answering her question.

"Since how long?"

"Since a few months ago."

His eyes showed the sincerity he had inside his heart. This time he really was not lying to her …could she see it? 

Li Rui nodded her head softly as she turned her head a little to look out of the window again. But this time, he could see her face very clearly.

It was evening.

The breeze flowing inside from the window was making her hair fly a little here and there.

"Rui, you will get cold."

He said with a frown when he noticed that the wind was too cold for his wife's delicate body.

His frown deepened when Li Rui turned her head to look at him silently but she never closed the window.

Xi Ying sighed as he dragged himself a little closer to Li Rui.

"I know that things are not right between us but I shall not let you play with your health like this. You need to think about yourself …and now our child too."

A dazed look appeared in Xi Ying's eyes when he said his last words.

How nice it would have been if they had normal circumstances just like any other couple. Last time, he could not accompany Li Rui when she was pregnant with Xi Ling…but this time he has all time to take care of his wife …however this time she doesn't seem to like him by her side.

She doesn't feel safe with him.

Xi Ying composed himself when another wave of old breeze hit his face…making his eyes a little teary.

He blinked them and forwarded his hand to close the window.

Since the window was on the other side where Li Rui was sitting, he had to get closer to her but he didn't stay like that for more time.

As soon as the window was closed, he wanted to go back to where he was sitting but his hand was held suddenly.

The cold hands on his warm ones make him frown again.

His attention was not on the fact that Li Rui touched him by her own will but it was on the fact that her hands were too cold.

"Why are your hands always cold, Rui?"

Xi Ying murmured as he took those cold hands near his mouth and blew warm air on them. His internal heat soon transferred to the soft hands making their temperature rise a little.

Amidst all this, he heard Li Rui asking her again.

"When I came to your study that day…did you know everything?"

Xi Ying paused for a second and then nodded his head silently as he continued to warm Li Rui's hands.

A moment later, he heard Li Rui again.

"Did you hate me just because you thought that I drugged you and planned all that four years ago?"

Xi Ying's actions stilled at Li Rui's question.

When he raised his head to look at Li Rui again, his eyes were filled with desperation… desperation to make her believe his next words.

"I never hated you, Rui…maybe I felt used, but I never hated you."

However Li Rui again silently looked at him making him unable to comprehend whether she really believed him or not.

"How did you get to know the truth?"     

Again a question was thrown at Xi Ying but this time he didn't how he should answer it.

What could he perhaps say?

That he stayed by her side for almost three months in a way that she could not see him but he could see and hear everything …and that is how he got to know the truth … so many truths.

Xi Ying's head lowered and he whispered

"Rui, I don't want to lie to you but I can't tell you the truth also."

He had expected Li Rui to act distant, however, the next moment the same soft voice fell in Xi Ying's ears.   

"It's alright. I can understand if you have secrets …both of us have secrets w…"

"No…"

Li Rui was forced to stop amidst her words when Xi Ying suddenly raised his head and held her face with both of his hands.

"I don't wish to keep any secret from you, Rui"

Xi Ying whispered firmly as he leaned closer to the beautiful face.

He stared in those clean black eyes and didn't find any resistance so he leaned closer. Resting his forehead against Li Rui's forehead he sighed because of the soothing scent coming from his wife's body. It gave him peace … the peace that he could never find anywhere.

"Rui, I was injured during my return to the Imperial City a few months back."

Xi Ying started and then paused soon also. It took him a great courage to reveal the truth. Perhaps because he had not started to fear Li Rui's distrust.

It made him feel helpless but he didn't wish to lie. 

"Will you believe me if I say that I was not in my body during the period my wound healed?"

Caressing her cheek softly, he stared into her eyes as he continued

"Will you believe me if I say that I saw everything during that period of time… even the truth that you never drugged me …will you believe me?"

Xi Ying asked with a voice that was laced with desperation.

He wished to hear Li Rui's 'yes' just once.

For once, he wished to believe that she really trusted him.

However, he could never hear the answer he wanted to hear because the next moment, the carriage stopped.

A sound of something hitting the ground could be heard inside the carriage and everything inside the carriage stilled completely.