Heart of Darkness

234 All or nothing



Roxana left Alexander’s chambers feeling some kind of rush she couldn’t explain. She felt somehow powerful, in control, and satisfied that she could also make him feel frustrated. It was almost the same feeling as when she discovered something new and exciting and with this, the excitement was even more because it felt forbidden. That slowly made the excitement fade and her face burn hot.

No. He touched her too so why would she be embarrassed about touching him? It was time to use her skills to torture. She knew after all how to seduce. Well, usually to buy something or get herself out of difficult situations but clearly, she could use it to torture a certain person as well.

Also, she couldn’t deny she enjoyed it meanwhile. To have him beneath her and feel the way his heartbeat increased against her chest, the way his breathing changed and those low growls leaving his lips made her body tingle. And then the thick length of him in her hand… She froze.

How?

Disguising as a man, she had seen men. It was not that size. She knew it grew bigger when aroused but… still? Would it grow to that size? Was it possible? Was it a demon thing?

Huh! Maybe it was a demon thing and she was doomed. That would surely be painful.

As she panicked she remembered Angelica with her child looking happy and used that image to calm down. It was possible. She wouldn’t die. Just faint perhaps.

Wait! Was she worried about that now, when this man told her he wanted to bite her? What kind of species was she mating with? And then she would sip blood?

Roxana had eaten rotten food when hungry so a sip of blood would be nothing as long as it wasn’t some strange demonic ritual. She took a deep breath and told herself to calm down. Then she went to find Gary and Peter.

As she arrived at their room in the barracks she stopped outside the door when she heard her name.

“We will have to be careful around her now. We don’t know what her relationship with the king is. She could become queen.” Peter said.

She heard Gary sigh. “You are right. We should keep our distance.”

Roxana stepped back carefully, her heart struck with sadness. They were not wrong to think that way. She couldn’t blame them. Turning around she left and went to sit alone in the garden. When she became queen things would be so different. She would not be able to do as she pleased, dress any way she liked, or behave as she wished.

It struck her now that perhaps she didn’t want wealth as much as she thought. Her dreams of gold and jewels could become true but she didn’t care for those things anymore.

She shook her head. She was being ungrateful when she finally got it all. A good man, wealth, and safety and she could stay in the kingdom she liked and still be with the people she liked even if they treated her differently. There were so many positive things about what was happening. She just had to remember how heartbroken she was when she thought she had to leave.

No! She did not want to leave. She loved this place and the people in it and maybe because of that she might even enjoy being a queen. And of course, she loved Alexander. But even if she did, she could still be angry with him.

For the rest of the morning, Roxana avoided him. This mind-reading she could not accept yet. Just how? She grew even angrier when she thought of the other lords reading her thoughts as well. The shady lord and the other one who allowed her into the castle and laughed behind her back.

She clenched her hand into a fist. She would pay them back. All of them. But for now, since they could read her mind, she would have to avoid them as well until… she did the mating thing.

Now she wanted to do it fast. If Alexander’s blood could protect her mind then she was ready to suck him dry. Anything but anyone reading her mind. For God’s sake. Having her mind exposed was worse than walking naked in public.

Perhaps…

When it was time for Lunch, Roxana decided she was not going to skip her lunch. She went to the lunch room and again some guards were talking about her. They sat around a round table and didn’t notice her standing at the door.

“She was a boy and now she is a girl.”

“Yes, and His Majesty kept her despite everything.”

“As his guard.” Another one said mockingly.

“You know he is not keeping her as his guard. Her duty is something else.” Another one pointed and they laughed.

Roxana waited for them to notice her standing there and when they finally did they rose quickly from their seat, their eyes widening with fear. What was it with the dramatic…

She paused and realized they were looking behind her. “Your Majesty!” They bowed deeply and kept their heads low.

Alexander came to stand beside her before she could look behind. He waited for the guards to lift their heads again and when they did they flinched at the fact that he smiled at them.

“Don’t be afraid. You are right. She was a boy and now a girl and soon she will be your queen.”

Roxana froze.

The guards froze.

Their face turned pale with each passing moment. Soon, she thought they were going to faint.

“Please sit and eat. We will leave you alone.” He said taking her hand. He led her away and she followed him still a little stunned.

“Alexander, you should not say such things so easily.” She told him as he walked her through the hall.

“Why not?”

“You are king and it is a political matter. People will talk.”

He pulled her around the corner and placed her against the wall. He stared into her eyes. “I told you, Roxana, when I opened my heart to you, that it is all or nothing for me. I want you to be my wife, my queen, my mate. I want you beside me, in my home, in my bed. I want to see you every day, to wake up to your face.”

She just stared into his eyes, her chest swelling with a warm feeling.

“And I want you soon. I don’t have the patience anymore. You frustrate me so well.” He said and her face flushed. “Since the day you stepped into this castle you have been frustrating me.”

“But… I didn’t do anything.”

“You don’t have to do anything.” He said stepping closer. He grabbed her jaw a bit harshly as if he was frustrated at the moment as well. His eyes were dark. “Just having you around, talking, walking, laughing, and breathing frustrates me.”

Oh well, then what did he want her to do?

“Good.” She breathed.

He narrowed his eyes and he stepped closer, pushing her with his body into the wall. He tilted her head back. “Can you handle a starved demon later?” He asked.

Handle?

She remembered his thickness in her hand and squealed that she recalled this now when he could read her mind. Panicked, she tried to push him away but he pinned her hands to the sides of her body.

“No.” She protested but he didn’t let her go. “I don’t want to be close as long as you can read my mind. It is not fair.”

“Then I will let you know what is on my mind.”

“How do I know what you say is truly what you think.”

“If you listen first you will know.” He told her. “But do you want to listen?”

“Yes. No?… I don’t know.” She breathed flushed.

She felt like he was going to say something that would turn her completely red.

He chuckled pinning her harder against the wall and bringing his lips close to her ear. His hot breath made her shiver.

“What are you doing? People might see.” She warned.

“Let them.” He husked, running the tip of his tongue along the seam of her ear.

Oh god. She shivered.

“I like the way you think.” He whispered taking her earlobe into his mouth and laving it with his tongue. “Especially your naughty thoughts.”

Embarrassed she tried to kick him but he had her perfectly trapped. “I don’t have such.” She lied.

He chuckled. “Well, they are very innocent compared to mine.” He said kissing and licking down her neck.

Roxana closed her eyes and her lips parted as his lips reached and lingered at the pulse beating in her neck. He kissed her, sucked, and nibbled until her body shuddered. He left the spot burning and tingling strangely and her pulse was beating even harder as if the blood wanted to push itself out of her veins.

“That is where I want to bite you,” He said softly,  bringing his lips to her mouth and kissing her fervently. “I want my fangs in your neck.”

Roxana drew in a sharp breath of anticipation, her lungs working hard to catch up to her rapidly breathing heart. God, she should be afraid but instead, she wondered, maybe even wanting to feel them sink right in where he kissed her. Where the strange tingling remained.

He released her pinned hands and she clutched onto him as he continued to kiss her. They were in the hall. People could come by. What was she doing?

Alexander tore his lips from her and continued saying more forbidden words.  “That is only one way I want to be inside of you.” He told her planting his lips on her neck again while his hands slowly and deliberately traveled down her stomach and reached between her legs to show her what he meant.

“Oh…” Roxana gasped despite the light brush through her pants.

Alexander stopped and released her. If this was his way of paying her back then it was cruel.

She looked at his darkened gaze.

“It is not part of a game, Roxana. This is just me wanting you.”

She was tired of the games too. She wanted him as well.

His eyes searched hers, looking a bit surprised. Her face flushed.

“Not here,” was all she told him, her gaze shying away.


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