Heart of Darkness

188 Finding a way out



Both Lord Quintus and Lord Rayven arrived at the garden as if they had been right behind the hedges watching the king. They helped her carry him back to the room where they lay him in his bed.

The news had already reached king Isaac who came to them immediately. He had still not exposed her disguise and he didn’t even look her way. He went straight to the king and loomed over him.

“What happened?” He asked.

Lord Quintus nodded toward Roxana and king Isaac turned to her. This was bad. Would she be a suspect now?

“I don’t know, Your Majesty. He just collapsed.” She said.

King Isaac returned to look at the Lords. “I am a physician. May I examine him?”

“Of course.”

They removed his wet clothes and King Isaac did a few examinations. She remembered him being skilled with what he did and he not only taught her medicine but physics as well.

King Isaac stopped and then covered his bare body with the blanket. “Let’s bring a few more blankets.” He told the maid by his side. She gave a nod and left.

“He is very cold. His temperature is not right for a human body and I don’t think he got this cold from the rain.” He became thoughtful.

“He is usually cold.” Lord Quintus said. “Like myself.”

King Isaac looked between them as if to find similarities. Roxana did the same. She had noticed that both the lords had some similarities with the king. She would first point out the pale skin that looked like it had never seen the sun. It should look unhealthy but for some odd reason, it didn’t.

King Isaac gave up and decided to do a few more examinations. They all watched him in silence.

“He is in a state of imbalance. He seems to have been this way for a long time.” King Isaac finally spoke.

He had taught her a few things about the importance of balance to stay healthy. The balance between rest and work, what to eat, how long to sleep and how much to work. At the time that kind of knowledge was something only a few had but with time more physicians had learned its importance. King Isaac had also taught her something that according to him only a few knew. The health of the mind was just as important if not more. A balanced mind was needed to have a healthy body as well.

Everyone had negative thoughts, insecurities, dark thoughts, fears, and doubts. It was part of the balance. But too much of it could be hurtful and that was where people needed to learn how to navigate those feelings. He had taught her in steps how to live with those feelings without letting them control her. It was in a time when she was in a lot of turmoil and he helped her overcome them. But even when she healed she still had scars that would open sometimes.

She looked at King Isaac feeling gratitude for all that he taught her. For being her mentor in dark times. He would surely not expose her.

“What causes his imbalance?” Roxana asked.

King Isaac tilted his head to one side. He looked thoughtful. It was as if he couldn’t quite figure out what was wrong with him. “I am not sure but given that he is a king… overextension? Lack of sleep? Distress?.”

The maid came back with more blankets and covered him. “Let’s put some fire in the hearth.” He then ordered her.

“We will make sure he rests well.” Lord Quintus said.

“He needs that. If his condition gets worse, inform me. I will leave you alone with him.” He gave a slight nod and then left.

Gary arrived right after the king left. He bowed, “I heard what happened.” He said panting.

“We will stay with His Majesty. You two can go rest.” Lord Rayven told them

Gary gave a nod and got ready to leave expecting her to follow him.

Roxana looked at Alexander who lay defenseless on the bed. If anyone wanted to harm him this would be the perfect opportunity. They could easily blame it on him being sick. Then she looked at Lord Quintus and Lord Rayven. For now, they were suspects on her list and Sir Fulker told her not to leave the King and to watch him at all times.

“Rox.” Gary hushed when he realized she hadn’t followed him to the door. Ignoring him she kept her eyes on Lords.

“My Lords. I can not leave His Majesty’s side. It is my duty to guard him.” She told them.

Lord Quintus looked like he was forcing back a smile but Lord Rayven’s black eyes widened with intimidation. “I am giving you permission to leave.”

She wanted to scoff but remained composed. She didn’t want to anger a Lord but in this case, she would if she had to.

“With all due respect my Lord, but as his Majesty’s personal guard, I take orders from him and only him.”

“Rox,” Gary came to her side and gave her a discreet slap on the back before trying to drag her away but she pulled her arm away from his grasp her gaze still holding Lord Rayven’s.

Gary chuckled nervously. “My apologies, My lo…”

“Unless His Majesty wakes up and orders us to leave, we will stay by his side,” Roxana said cutting him off without looking away from Lord Rayven.

Lord Rayven narrowed his eyes and remained quiet for a while before turning to Lord Quintus. They gave each other a certain look and then decided to leave them. “Take well care of his Majesty,” Lord Quintus smiled at her as they walked by and Lord Rayven looked displeased. Once they left, Gary breathed in relief.

“Do you want us killed?” He asked her. “What were you thinking?”

Before she could reply there was a knock on the door and shortly after Peter entered the room. Gary began to complain to him immediately but Peter was unfazed. “You did that?” He asked almost fascinated.

“Anyway,” She sighed becoming serious. “Our priority is His Majesty. We serve him and we shall not forget that it is our duty and if any harm comes to him we will be held responsible. That is what we should fear.” She told them.

How could she leave him with these guards who didn’t have their priorities straight? But she couldn’t blame them either. They were just trying to survive.

“We should also fear death at the hands of vengeful lords.” Gary folded his arms over his chest.

“When you become guard you already knew the whole purpose of being one. You knew that you might one day die protecting His Majesty.”

He paused, his eyes moving to the side as if recalling a memory. “I did.” He then admitted. “I would die for His Majesty.”

He said with such sincerity it threw her off guard. She wanted to be surprised, perhaps because she never imagined willingness to sacrifice herself for some wealthy man or royal, but now she could see why someone would want to protect the king.

No. Not any king. This king. She wanted to protect him too. For the kingdom and its people. They needed someone like him. But even with that thought, she would not sacrifice herself. She had some things left to do before dying.

“You are right. We serve His Majesty and only him.” Gary said and Peter nodded.

Roxana smiled. At least he had two loyal guards.

“Is he just ill or did someone do something to him?” Peter asked.

“We don’t know yet. He might just be unwell and exhausted.” She remembered the frightened look in his eyes, the way he had curved into a ball while covering his ears. What made him react that way?

“Rox, you should go change before you get sick. Make sure to have something to eat as well so we can replace each other.,” Peter told her.

“Alright. Don’t leave his side, no matter what.” She reminded.

Gary shook his head with a smile. “Don’t worry.”

Roxana glanced at the king one more time before leaving.

As she walked the halls she came across king Isaac. It was as if he had been waiting for her.

“Rox.” He said using her new name. She knew him at a time when she was only Roxana. She was fifteen. A girl alone at that age, it couldn’t get more dangerous.

Everywhere was unsafe. In the streets, she could get raped. She worked at inn where the owner also tried to have his way with her. She became a maid and the Lord tried to molest her, only for his wife to accuse her of seducing him. Feeling hopeless she would steal food, but even then she was punished. Once spanked in public and the other time almost kicked to death if not Lord Isaac had come to her rescue.

He had carried her bruised body home and even then she had feared him, afraid that he would have an ulterior motive. But he didn’t. He healed her, fed her, and surprised her with his kindness. He gave her hope, only for it to get crushed later when she faced cruelty again.

She lived in a world, where meeting kind people was like finding jewels in the desert.

“Your Majesty.” She looked at him remembering the few days of her teenage years when she felt safe.

He walked over with a smile. “I never thought I would see you again. How are you doing?”

“I am in good health, Your Majesty. How about you?”

“Getting old.”

She smiled. “You are a king?”

“And you aRox. A guard.”

She looked down not knowing what to say.

“Does the king know or are you…?”

She shook her head. “He doesn’t.”

King Isaac looked at her with worry. “You are playing with fire.” He told her.

“I know.”

“Do you?”

He stepped closer. “You should leave before it is too late. I can make it possible if you want.”

He would help her escape and this would probably be a good opportunity but in the back of her mind, she kept thinking about the king who was vulnerable at this moment. She felt torn but she would have to leave at some point and if she kept delaying it, it could be too late. It was not her duty to protect him. He had been doing fine without her before she came.

King Isaac was surprised that she hesitated. “You are not thinking of doing something stupid? No one sent you to do anything right?”

Her eyes widened. “No Your Majesty. I would never hurt the king.” She felt the bitter taste of a lie on her lips. She might not hurt him physically but she was deceiving him.

“Then I will arrange for you to leave tonight.” He said with finality.

“There is someone back home…”

“I will help you send a word about your whereabouts.”

Well then, this was her chance. She just hoped the king would wake up until then so she could leave free of guilt.


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