Genshin Impact: This Priest is Cringe, But She’s Also Unbeatable
Chapter 34: The Giant Goblin
Outside the Domain, the live broadcast plaza had become a roaring sea of laughter.
On the massive light screen, the farcical encounter between the four-person squad and the two sisters—a classic case of “Listen to my explanation!” versus “I’m not listening, I’m not listening!”—was broadcast for all to see.
“Hahahaha, they were just passing by to watch the show and got pegged as vultures waiting to swoop in.
Those two sisters were framed so badly!” “That captain literally invented an entire military drama in his head!
‘They’re waiting for teammates to flank us’?
Bro, there are only two of them, how are they supposed to flank anyone?!” “The Berserker screaming ‘If you’re going to make up an excuse, at least make it believable!’ while running for his life absolutely sent me!” “The priestess’s facial expressions are the real MVP.
You can see her go from strained patience to utter despair, and finally to just giving up on healing them entirely!” “Wait, she’s raising her staff!
What is she doing?” Just then, under the stunned gazes of countless viewers, Celeste casually smashed open the teetering wooden fence with a single swing of her staff.
In the next second, Selene transformed into a silver whirlwind, charging ferociously into the goblin horde.
“Holy crap!
They actually snatched the kill?!” “They said they’d snatch it, and they did it.
These sisters are legit; when they say they’ll do something, they actually follow through!” “The four-person squad: We were just talking tough, why did you take us seriously?!” “The captain’s face has turned as green as a goblin’s!
Hahahaha!” The live broadcast perfectly captured the squad’s comically inept combat stance.
They were still attacking the goblins, but their heads were whipping around in terror, as if thousands of enemy troops were lying in ambush all around them.
“What are you looking at?” On the screen, Selene flicked the green blood from her sword, her gaze sweeping over them with icy disdain.
“Weren’t you the ones who insisted we were going to snatch your kill?” Celeste added indifferently, tucking her staff away.
“We’ve snatched it.
Are you satisfied now?” With that, the two sisters turned and walked away, their departure as casual as a stroll through the park.
Behind them, the four-person squad was still locked in their ridiculous combat formation, slowly backing away while glancing over their shoulders every few steps.
The sight of their paranoia against the backdrop of the silent, empty forest created a scene of pure absurdity.
The laughter in the live broadcast plaza was so loud it threatened to blow the roof off.
…
Continuing along the riverbank, Selene was still doubled over, laughing so hard she could barely walk straight as she replayed the farce in her head.
“Sis, did you see their faces at the end?
Their eyes were bulging out like copper bells!” Celeste smiled, but just as she was about to reply, her footsteps came to an abrupt halt.
She froze.
“Wait.” Something was wrong.
A continuous, low-frequency vibration was thrumming up from the ground, coming from somewhere in the distance.
At first, it was faint, almost imperceptible if one wasn’t paying close attention.
But the vibration never stopped, and it was slowly, steadily growing stronger.
Something huge was moving toward them.
“What is it, Sis?” Selene’s laughter died on her lips.
She followed her sister’s gaze into the depths of the dense forest, and now she too could feel the ground beneath her feet begin to tremble.
In the distant sky, massive flocks of birds erupted from the canopy, startled into a chaotic, panicked cloud of black dots.
Celeste gripped her pink staff, her expression turning grave.
These vibrations were not a good sign.
The tremors became more distinct, a dull, percussive thudding that seemed to emanate from deep within the earth.
It was like a colossal drum, each beat striking right at their hearts.
The pebbles scattered along the riverbank began to rattle and jump, dancing with an uneasy energy.
“This…
whatever it is, it’s big.” Celeste’s expression was solemn, her eyes scanning sharply in the direction of the disturbance.
From deep within the forest, the sharp crack of snapping trees and the grinding roar of something heavy being dragged across the ground were now clearly audible.
Selene gripped the Immovable Mountain, her knuckles white.
Holy light flowed across the shield’s surface, casting a solemn glow upon her face.
“Sis, should we go around it?” Celeste pondered for a moment before shaking her head.
“The disturbance is too great.
The affected area will be massive.
Taking a detour might not even be safe.” “Let’s get a look at it first.
We’ll play it by ear.” The two immediately changed direction, slipping into the dense forest.
Using the thick tree trunks as cover, they began to sneak quietly toward the source of the terrifying sound.
The closer they got, the more deafening the roaring became.
‘It’s like a runaway battering ram rampaging through the woods,’ was the only thought that crossed Celeste’s mind.
Soon, a colossal shadow fell over them, cast through the gaps in the canopy, shrouding them in darkness.
Both sisters held their breath.
They finally saw it.
It was a goblin.
A monster that stood four or five meters tall, its skin a dark, mottled green, as rough and gnarled as the bark of a century-old tree.
Thick iron chains were wrapped haphazardly around its hulking body.
In one hand, it dragged a giant mace fashioned from the entire trunk of a small tree, its surface studded with wicked iron spikes.
Every time the mace dragged, it plowed a deep trench into the forest floor.
Every time it swung, it effortlessly smashed trees as thick as a man’s embrace into nothing but splinters.
Foul-smelling drool dripped from its gaping maw, and a murky, unintelligible roar rumbled from deep within its throat.
[Giant Goblin Lv.???
(Elite)] [Points: 3000] [Characteristics: Possesses terrifying physical strength and astonishing defense.
Physical attacks inflict crushing and knockback effects.
Weakness: Relatively slow movement and clumsy turning.] [Note: An extreme mutation among goblins.
Its power is enough to shake the very earth.
It is a walking nightmare that most adventurer squads pray they never encounter.] In an open space not far ahead of the Giant Goblin, several motes of white light—the telltale sign of teleportation—had just dissipated, leaving behind only a few pieces of broken equipment and shattered potion bottles.
A team had just been wiped out.
“Gods…” Selene’s throat felt dry.
“A goblin that big?
It took out an entire team just like that?” Celeste’s eyes swept over the battlefield, her mind making a swift calculation.
“We got here too late.
That’s fine, saves us the trouble.
We’ll just quietly…” Before she could even finish the words “go around,” the Giant Goblin turned its head, its movements restless as if it had lost its previous target.
Its huge, murky eyes suddenly locked directly onto the tree where the two sisters were hiding.
“Wulu?!” A puzzled roar, followed by a violent, earth-shaking charge.
Boom!
Boom!
Boom!
The ground groaned under its immense weight.
For its sheer size, its speed was terrifying.
Its massive strides devoured the distance between them in the blink of an eye.
“We’ve been spotted!
Run!” Celeste’s expression changed drastically.
She grabbed her sister’s arm and spun around, the Blessing of Wind making her as light as a swallow as she darted away.
But Selene couldn’t keep up.
The Paladin’s heavy plate armor and massive shield made it impossible for her to move through the dense jungle at high speed.
The Giant Goblin’s shadow was already looming over her.
“Sis!
I can’t outrun it!” Selene risked a glance back.
The hideous, giant face was just inches away.
She gritted her silver teeth, a flash of fierce determination igniting in her eyes.
“No more running!
We fight!” She spun around abruptly, slamming the Immovable Mountain into the ground with a thunderous boom.
Brilliant holy light erupted from beneath her feet, forming an indestructible golden ring around her.
She seemed to take root in the earth itself, facing down the world-shaking behemoth with her small, unyielding frame.
“Selene!” Celeste’s heart clenched.
She had no choice but to skid to a halt and turn back, the light of her staff flaring to life in her hand.
A trace of bloodthirsty excitement flickered in the Giant Goblin’s murky eyes.
It hadn’t expected these two tiny bugs to actually dare to stand their ground.
It let out a deafening roar as the mace, hewn from an entire tree, was raised high into the air, blocking out what little sunlight pierced the forest canopy.
With a whistle that tore through the air, the giant weapon became a destructive black shadow, plummeting down toward the top of Selene’s head.
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