Chapter 258: It's...So...Big...
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***
After everyone finished eating, Yomite was handed an 800k Mora bill.
He did not know whether to be happy or sad, as he normally paid well over a million Mora for a meal compare to this little sum…
And so once again, his wallet was bleeding.
‘While I still have stocked up a lot money, I need to figure out another way of earning Mora…I don’t feel like adventuring every damn day, not to mention, I’ll be training soon, so there won’t be enough time for it.’
He wanted to meet this edgy Sasuke lookalike but it seemed that he’d disappeared for good.
So Yomite stopped climbing the tree and jumped down.
“My word…are you some sort of a monkey? You’re just hanging out in the trees.” Mona commented on his odd behavior.
“There are monkeys in this world?” He asked.
Mona appeared stunned by his response, but then recalled that he was not from this world, “Not in this location anyway, the only monkey here is you.”
Yomite rolled his eyes at Mona’s comment and decided to poke some fun, “So anyway, Mona Megistus.” Yomite bowed slightly, “It is truly a pleasure to meet someone as esteemed as you. Are you perchance a royalty of some sort? No… looking at your wardrobe that cannot possibly be the case…”
“L-Lay off! Don’t bring my financial status into this! Anyway, Mona Megistus is my title, it means, The Great Astrologer Mona,” she stammered, trying to hide her embarrassment.
Yomite smiled brightly, “Very well Mona Megistus, I have a proposition for you today.”
She looked wary, “What exactly would that entail?”
“Simple enough, I have a place you can stay, I have enough money and I desire your somewhat correct prediction ability. If I am to become your unofficial disciple, then you should join my party. Don’t worry you don’t need to go adventuring with me or anything, you can just do whatever you want. I’ll just come to you once in a while for a prediction or something and that’s more than enough.”
“I decline. Astrology is a divine art not meant to practice for materialistic reasons!” Mona snapped at him.
She sounded offended by his words, which surprised him.
Most people wouldn’t refuse such an opportunity, judging by her condition, she appeared to be living on the streets…among the poorest of the poor.
“It’s indeed true my Mora is limited, but as a prophet of fate, I mustn’t use the power granted to me frivolously and for a selfish purpose!” She insisted adamantly and stood up from her chair, “I thank you for the meal, it was great. Probably the greatest I had in months. I’ll head out now, and in two weeks time, I’ll come to Mondstadt which is also the time where I’ll require your assistance.”
“Ahhh…okay fine I get it, what a shame,” he waved his hand dismissively, “But can I ask you one last thing before you leave?”
“Hmm?” Mona turned around, waiting patiently for him to continue.
“How is your butt so huge? I’ve been thinking this for a while now, yet I cannot comprehend this mysterious phenomenon.”
“…”
Yomite felt like teasing her for the last time before she left.
“Woah… Assistant that’s…”
Hu Tao was uncertain as to whether he should have asked a stranger this question.
Yomite used to tell Hu Tao that her butt was big, which she took as a compliment. However, if he were to say that to a stranger…
“Rude Tattoo! How can you just ask a girl such a rude question!”
Paimon shouted, while Lumine was nodding next to her.
“Yum-Yum that was a bit…”
Even Barbara seemed a bit disgusted.
“…”
Mona stared blankly for a few seconds until she began to explain, “My backside…is naturally large. Even though I don’t eat much and I’m skinny, it just always goes…there…and it keeps getting bigger… I don’t know the question to that myself, still, as expected from someone like you, you perverted Casanova trash.”
To his surprise, she was not embarrassed and calmly expressed her disgust.
She was embarrassed when he mentioned her title, but she was completely unashamed when he mentioned her body.
Yomite laughed at her remark and responded, “It was just a joke, please don’t take it to heart, I apologize. Still, you really are interesting to not even react to something like that, a will of steel… If you ever change your mind, you’re welcome, we will for sure accommodate you. Your abilities are truly interesting.”
“Sure. I’ll be happy to see you all later.”
Despite being a loner, Mona enjoyed everyone’s company.
And the constant exchanges with Yomite reminder her of her senile old hag of a master, so she didn’t actually mind any of his words because she used to live in such environment.
They all exchanged pleasantries with her one last time and she left, heading towards her destination.
“…Forgive Paimon…but now that Paimon looks at her carefully…Mona’s butt is big…no, its ginormous!” The tiny pixie gasped and covered her mouth with her hands.
The others also looked at Mona’s departing figure and they couldn’t help but agree.
Iris, drooling, remarked, “There’s a lot of meat on it.”
“At first, I felt like what Yum-Yum said was too much, but now that I look at it…it is very big…I kind of…want to touch it to see how it feels…” Barbara mumbled.
“It’s much bigger than mine!” Hu Tao added on, “I wonder if she would let me squeeze it…”
Lumine and Yomite both nodded. It began as a joke or teasing, but in the end, everyone agreed that Mona Megistus had the largest butt they’d ever seen.
“…I can hear you! Can you guys stop staring at it!? Yes! My butt is big! Stop ogling! Are all of you perverts or did you catch the pervert disease from the Casanova!?”
Mona shouted as she was leaving, it seemed she overheard them.
“””Sorry!”””
Right after she left, the group began discussing.
“Paimon would want to have a butt like that someday! Heh heh heh…”
“Paimon…her butt is almost bigger than your entire body…What would you even do with it…? I don’t think…it would match…” Yomite chuckled, feeling a tad bit sorry for the fairy to crush her future dreams.
“Aw…” Paimon mumbled sadly.
“Mona was very pretty, I wonder how she would look in a nun outfit. It seems like she is wearing the same clothes every day, so the next time we meet I should probably prepare something for her.” Barbara pondered.
“I would be very happy with her addition to the party! Just think about it! She could see the future of someone who will die soon, and I will be getting customers left and right! One customer, two customers, three customers! Bam!!! Business shall be booming!” Hu Tao replied enthusiastically.
Yomite sighed, “Of course you would love that…”
The group continued to converse until they left the inn and Yomite requested that Lumine teleport them both to Fischl so they could finally depart.