Four Of A Kind

Chapter 49: [2.22] This is How Harem Anime Starts

[Week 3: Wednesday – 8:15 AM]

Sixteen days.

I had survived sixteen days of Valentine employment, and my reward was Hurricane Harlow making landfall at my desk before first period.

Not near my desk. Not in the general vicinity of my desk. She was sitting IN my chair, her pink-ribboned twin tails bouncing as she waved at me from across the classroom like I was a soldier returning from war.

“Good morning, Assistant-kun!”

Half the classroom turned to stare. The other half was already staring.

“That’s my seat.”

“I know! I’m warming it for you!”

“That’s… not a thing.”

“It is now!” She beamed at me with the confidence of someone who had just invented a new social custom and expected the world to adapt. “I got here early specifically to make sure your chair was at optimal temperature. You’re welcome!”

Felix sat two rows over, he had a bag of chips open on his desk despite the no-food rule, and he was eating them one by one while observing our exchange like it was premium entertainment.

“Harlow. It’s September. The chairs don’t get cold.”

“They get room temperature! Room temperature is basically cold! My thighs are very warm, Isaiah. This is a service I’m providing.”

Did she just say thighs?

In front of everyone?

Loudly?

The whispers started immediately. I caught fragments.

“Did she say thighs?”

“Is that the scholarship kid?”

“Are they dating?”

“No way, he’s too poor.”

“But she’s sitting in his chair…”

I pinched the bridge of my nose. “Please vacate my seat.”

“Say please again.”

“I already said please.”

“Say it nicer.”

“Harlow.”

“That’s not please.”

“Please. Harlow. Move.”

She considered this for a moment, tapping her chin with one finger like she was evaluating a complex philosophical argument. Then she stood up, smoothed her skirt, and gestured to the chair with a flourish.

“Your throne, Assistant-kun.”

I sat down. The seat was, in fact, warm.

I hated that she was right about that.

Before I could even set my bag on the floor, Harlow had pulled a chair from the desk behind me and dragged it next to mine. The scraping sound made everyone in a three-row radius wince.

“So I have some requests for today!”

“Of course you do.”

She pulled out her phone. The case was aggressively pink, covered in stickers featuring anime characters I vaguely recognized and some I definitely didn’t. The screen displayed a list. It was color-coded. There were emojis. Many emojis.

“Okay so after school I need to go to the craft store because I’m out of fabric for my cosplay project and I found this AMAZING pattern for Madoka’s Soul Gem but the burgundy satin I have is the wrong shade, and then I need to pick up a package from the post office because I ordered custom buttons from Etsy and they finally shipped, and then I need to get new hair clips because I lost my favorite ones somewhere, I think they fell behind my dresser but I can’t move my dresser because it’s really heavy, and then—”

“Harlow. Breathe.”

She took a breath. It lasted approximately 0.3 seconds.

“—and then I need to stop by the manga store because volume 17 of my favorite series is out and I’ve been waiting FOREVER, like literally three months, which is basically forever in manga time, and the main character finally confesses but I don’t know WHO they confess to and I NEED to find out before someone spoils it online, and then—”

“I’ll drive you.”

She stopped mid-word. Her mouth hung open for a moment.

“Really?”

“We’ll make it work.”

Her entire face transformed. If her smile had been bright before, it was now approaching nuclear levels. She threw her arms around my neck in what I could only describe as a weaponized hug, pressing her body against my shoulder with zero concern for the thirty other students watching us.

“You’re the BEST, Assistant-kun!”

“Please stop calling me that.”

“Never!”

She bounced back toward her actual seat at the front of the room, practically skipping between desks. Several students had to lean out of her way or risk being bowled over by concentrated enthusiasm.

Felix leaned across the aisle before I could even process what had just happened.

“Dude. DUDE.”

“What.”

“She just gave you her whole schedule. Like you’re her boyfriend or something.”

“I’m her assistant.”

“Assistants don’t get greeted like that.” He gestured vaguely at the space Harlow had just occupied. “Assistants don’t get sat-on-seats-to-warm-them. That’s boyfriend behavior, Isaiah. That’s ’we’ve been dating for six months and I’m comfortable around you’ behavior.”

“You’re reading too much into it.”

“Am I? AM I?” He pointed at the front of the room where Harlow had settled into her seat next to Cassidy. As I watched, Harlow leaned over and whispered something to her sister. Cassidy’s head snapped toward me. Her purple eyes narrowed into slits.

She mouthed something that looked suspiciously like “I’m watching you.”

Or possibly “I hate you.”

Hard to tell from this distance.

“See?” Felix gestured triumphantly. “The sister is already getting territorial. This is how harem anime starts, Isaiah. I’ve seen enough of them to recognize the signs.”

“This isn’t an anime.”

“That’s what every protagonist says before they end up with five girlfriends and a beach episode.”

Mr. Patterson chose that moment to shuffle into the room with his usual enthusiasm for existence.

Which is to say, none at all.

Attendance was taken. Announcements were made. I spent the entire homeroom period trying not to make eye contact with Cassidy, who had apparently decided that glaring at me was her new favorite hobby.

When the bell rang, Harlow appeared at my desk again like she’d teleported.

“See you at three! Don’t forget! Craft store first!”

“I won’t forget.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

“Pinky promise?”

“I’m not doing that.”

“Please?”

“Harlow.”

She held up her pinky anyway. It had a tiny heart drawn on the nail in what looked like pink gel pen.

I hooked my pinky around hers.

Her smile could have powered a small city.

“Yay! Okay bye!”

She disappeared into the hallway crowd, twin tails bouncing.