Novel Full 53 Florida Man Distributes Drugs to Underage Girls, Parent is Happy
Chapter 53 – Florida Man Distributes Drugs to Underage Girls. Parent is Happy.
After the hectic, Xu Nuan asked Qi Niu to bring Yao Qiqi back to the ship. The girl obeyed the order and escorted the little girl back. As for the others, they followed Leo into the store and browsed his items.
Because of Leo’s deeds, the girls stopped being on guard around Leo. They treated him as a respectable senior and took off their veils and headwear. They were all gorgeous and beautiful.
The group looked around the store and inspected the vegetables. Some of them gawked at the yang flame pills while others fixated on grain pills.
“Senior. How much is this?”
“Is this expensive?”
“What can this pill do?”
Leo patiently answered them one by one.
“The grain pills are 20 years of lifespan each. Oh, be careful with that glass jar. Those are Prosthetic Eyeballs of Fenrir, and I sell one for 500 years of lifespan. And about that yang flame dans, it boosts your physical strength for a few days and permanently increases your fire essence, yang Qi, and lifespan. The medium-grade one is 40 years each. The high grade is 70 years.”
The girls gulped as they were oblivious of the pill’s true value. Most of them returned the item to the shelves as they didn’t think it was worth losing their lifespan for rare pills. However, everybody couldn’t look away from the Bloodmelon, which gave off a bloody scent.
One of them pointed at the melon, “Senior, how much for this?”
Leo deeply sighed as these girls were hard customers. Since he figured that the girls valued their lifespan highly, he cut down the price tag and gave them a bargain.
“10 years of lifespan each.”
“Eh?” Some of the girls were surprised. They surrounded the Bloodmelon basket and started picking them up. One of them carried five in her arms.
Young girls could be terrifying when they saw discounted items in a store. In less than 10 seconds, the baskets of bloodmelons were empty.
Leo frowned and gazed at the disciples, who hoarded several melons in their arms. He asked them.
“Do you even realize what they can do?”
The girls widely grinned. One of them nodded, “I’m a simple girl. I sense water Qi, I buy!”
“…”
.
Bloodmelon
Can only be found in Blood Swamps of demon-infested mystic realms. The melons grow from absorbing blood from the swamps, and their juice is filled with demonic Qi and Yin Energy. It is one of many fruits that Vampires and plant monsters are very fond of. Can be used as a water element catalyst.
Traits
Increase water element Qi and demonic Qi by 10 years’ worth of cultivation (If consumed)
Increase water-based pill’s success chance by 30%. (If used in alchemy)
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Leo was aware of this item’s description. Since he couldn’t eat all of them to get lifespan, he might as well sell them for some changes.
The 19 disciples each took five melons. Leo absorbed their lifespan, and everybody stored the items in their spatial rings in glee. Then, everybody saluted Leo, thanking him for selling them for cheap.
However, one of them hesitated. She turned around and gazed at the refrigerator chest, which contained rejuvenate tea.
Leo noticed her gaze. He laughed.
“Fine. Nobody is going to buy that expensive tea anyway. I’ll give everybody one bottle each. Oh, I forgot to mention. The medium-grade rejuvenate tea can decrease your physical age by five years. What I fed that little girl was a high-graded one. I didn’t give her a lot, so she will just look one or two years younger.”
“!!!”
All girls stopped their feet in their tracks. Their round eyes glinted in red light as if they transformed into predators.
Leo broke a sweat. Their dark expressions were the same as Yandere girls in anime. Still, Leo quietly passed 19 bottles of medium-grade tea to the disciples.
After everybody got their tea of youth, they quickly stored them in their spatial ring and kowtowed to Leo.
“Senior! I’ll definitely return here to buy more one day!”
“Senior Florida Man, please save more of that tea. I’ll get stronger and come back!”
“Please tell us when you have another promotion! I won’t miss it!”
“…”
Leo blankly waved his hand and dully stared at the girls. He wondered if he should start selling cosmetic items, dresses, or women’s shoes in the future. He might as well purchase stylish evening dresses from the online shopping system and resell them to these girls.
Putting his idea into action, Leo secretly opened his online store system and searched for woman’s dresses. He randomly picked one of them, which looked like something that a Hollywood star would wear at a movie premiere.
DING
It cost Leo only one year of lifespan.
The box of dress appeared in front of Leo. He opened it and pulled the dress out.
As soon as the dress came out, the girls stared at it with round eyes. One of them clattered their jaws in astonishment while the others drooled.
The girl that had asked for rejuvenate tea asked first. She dropped the formality and got to the point.
“How much?”
Leo gazed at them with a poker face. He coughed as he felt bad for doing this.
“10 yea-“
“BUY! MINE!”
The girl leaped at the dress and snatched it from Leo’s hands, leaving the latter stunned. Then, she triggered something unbelievable. The 18 girls that had already exited the store rushed back in and surrounded him.
“SENIOR, I WANT ONE, TOO!”
“SELL IT TO ME, TOO!”
“I WANT THREE OF THOSE! CAN I HAVE RED, WHITE, AND BLACK PLEASE?!”
“…”
Once again, Leo witnessed women’s terrifying purchase power and their weird logic. They treated useful pills and immortal grass as expensive items, but they didn’t hesitate to buy anything that could improve their appearance and look.
For the girls, their looks, dresses, and cosmetic items were their social statuses. They might look calm and disciplined, but they were competitive when they compared their beauty with their peers.
“Relax. Give me a moment. Let me check the stock first.”
Leo politely asked them to open a way for him to return to his bedroom, to which they agreed. Upon entering his bedroom, he closed the door behind him and reopened the online store.
Due to the demand, he bought 19 sets of the same dress in three different colors. A large box appeared, and a total of 57 dresses were inside. Everything cost only 57 years of lifespan.
Leo returned to the girls and showed them the dresses.
“WOW!”
“MINE!”
“I’LL TAKE THOSE!”
Like vultures, the 19 girls quickly took three dresses each. Even the previous girl that already had a dress took three more.
CHA-CHING
58 dresses blessed Leo with 580 years of lifespan. Combined with the Bloodmelon, this transaction gave him 1,530 years of lifespan. Unfortunately, after cutting the dress cost and Xu Nuan’s share, Leo’s profit was only 1,319 years.
The girls started squealing and pressed their dresses on their bodies, checking the sizes. Their noise got so loud that Xu Nuan, who had been watching them from outside, coughed and reminded them of their manner.
“BEHAVE, GIRLS! WHAT ARE YOU, LITTLE KIDS?!”
The girls stopped talking and closed their mouths. However, they couldn’t stop smiling, looking forward to trying their new dresses.
Leo shook his head and deeply sighed. He watched them leave the building.
Xu Nuan proceeded to yell and ordered the girls to sit. She gave them a loud sermon for minutes. Afterward, she chased them back to the ship.
After sending them away, Leo approached Xu Nuan and gave her a bottle of high-grade rejuvenate tea and a medium-grade elixir grain pill. He also asked her.
“If that little girl’s condition worsens, feed her the tea, but don’t give her the pill. When she can start eating food again, give her the pill so that her inner energy can stabilize.”
Again, Xu Nuan bowed, “Thank you very much, senior. Without you, I don’t know what would happen to Qiqi.”
“Don’t mention it. Oh, be sure to check your lifespan. You got your commission from those kids.”
“Eh?”
.
Name: Xu Nuan
Age: 113
Remaining Lifespan: 1,230 Years, 9 Months, 5 Days, 4 Hours, 13 Minutes
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Upon seeing the increase in her lifespan, Xu Nuan was stunned. She remembered that it was only 1000ish when it appeared.
“S-Senior, how?”
Leo shrugged, “It’s your incentive. If you introduce me to more customers, you will get one-tenth of what they spend in my store.”
“…”
Xu Nuan bitterly laughed as she understood the purpose of this scheme. Still, she appreciated it.
“Those girls must have spent a lot. I think my lifespan increases by 150 years or so.”
“Yeah, they spent a lot on those dresses. Anyway, thank you for doing business. If you need more Bloodmelons or this tea, do come again.”
“I will. Oh, by the way.”
Xu Nuan noticed that Leo didn’t seem to be affiliated with anybody. She tried asking him.
“Would you like to accompany us to the mystic realm this season? We have an available spot open for you.”
Leo dryly laughed, ‘This again?’
The mystic realm seemed interesting, but Leo hadn’t solved the language barrier issue yet. He needed 20,000 years of lifespan for the auto-speech translation.
“I’m afraid I…”
Leo was about to refuse. But then, Xu Nuan suddenly described her previous expedition.
“Our sanctuary’s gateway brought us to the wetland last season. Our people ran into countless strong crocodiles and alligators, and we got a lot of water-based herbs and 4th-grade monster cores. We also managed to capture a few specimens. Actually, I tamed several lizardmen and a three-tailed alligator queen during the last expedition. In this season, we expect the gateway to take us back to the previous wetland since we failed to conquer it. I wonder if you are inter-“
“DID YOU SAY, ALLIGATOR QUEEN?!”
“Est, err…”
Leo accidentally grabbed Xu Nuan’s shoulders and shook her. Fortunately, he still wore rubber gloves, so she wasn’t infected.
Xu Nuan was taken aback. She didn’t expect that Leo would get excited over a monster. Still, she was delighted that Leo showed interest in their expedition and her story.
“Yes. Would you like to see it?”
Leo widely grinned and almost said yes. Fortunately, he closed his mouth before a word could slip out of his mouth. Leo then facepalmed.
“I-I’m so sorry. I’m in a bit predicament. I can’t join your expedition right now, or I might bring trouble to you and your girls.”
“Oh, I see.”
Xu Nuan nodded in understanding.
‘I see. Since Daoist Florida Man killed Ouyang Long, the Ouyang Clan might be targeting him. Therefore, if he joined the Amazonian Sanctuary, he might bring trouble to us. What a considerate senior!’
On the other hand, Leo had another thought.
‘No matter how tempting it is, I must stay here and wait for stupid cultivators to raid my store again! I need more lifespan for that juicy auto-speech translation! Without it, I can’t go on an adventure! But man, I miss my alligator.’
As Xu Nuan failed to invite Leo to visit her sanctuary, she bid farewell.
“Then, I would like to excuse myself. Again, thank you for saving Qiqi.”
“Don’t mention it.”
Xu Nuan turned around and flew back to her flying ship.
.
.
After the women were gone, Leo glanced at Cat.
The culprit behind the commotion noticed Leo’s stare and ran away. However, she ran into his granary.
Leo facepalmed for the nth time. He ignored the mischievous plant and turned his attention to the bouquet of grass flowers. They were still blooming and fresh even though they were left on the ground for a long time.
“Hah. What a day. Because of you, I almost killed a little girl.”
Leo picked the bundle of grass up and inspected the white flowers. He pursed his lips and brought them to the alchemy workshop.