FFF-Class Trashero

[33rd Round] Qualities of a Hero

“If you really have the talent of a Hero, you’ll be able to defeat that horse with ease.”

“How can you call that a horse?! Even you’re no match against him! Just look at his level!” My junior immediately protested after checking Red Dragon King Lolicoste’s stats, her face filled with contempt.

Why?

▷ Race: Red Dragonian

▷Level: 15308

▷Job: Tyrant (Violence = Domination↑)

▷Skill: Magic ZZZ, Violence ZZ, Mana ZZ, Demonic ZZ, Domination Z…

▷Status: Transformation, Sickness, Fracture, Fear

“Isn’t he dangerous enough for me to get killed if I so much as touched him?”

He looked fine on the outside, but due to his herniated lumbar and cervical discs, his combat power dropped by 99.999%.

I wasn’t blindly throwing her to certain death!

I hoped she wouldn’t misunderstand me.

“Please save me, Cute Emperor!”

“Hey! Why are you treating me like a murderer? I haven’t even hurt you yet!”

“But aren’t you going to kill me soon?!”

He was so confident when it came to kidnapping pretty girls.

Yet right now, he was looking pretty weak.

Arrogant against the weak and spineless against the strong.

It was common in any world.

I didn’t mean to criticize him. There was no honor in being killed, even if it was by a powerful being.

He was like my colleagues during my first round.

“Let’s not worry about trivial matters, shall we?”

“Ugh…”

“Why do I even need to do this…”

The Righteous Former Hero created the desired picture by gently coercing the disgruntled dragon king and human.

Red Dragon King vs. Hero

True Heroes always had a history of killing at least one or two evil lizards.

“Please give me a swift death, pretty lady…”

“Please save me…”

Despite lacking the motivation to fight, my junior rushed in with a branch.

She displayed extremely poor movement.

Forget dragons. She’d have trouble defeating goblins.

Flash.

Noticing her weakness, Lolicoste immediately revealed his true nature.

Though he was just trembling, his eyes changed in an instant as he cast his favorite propriety magic.

“Mollan?”

“Mollan?!”

“Mollan!”

Mollan slimes poured out of his pockets.

He used to summon a large number of slimes using spatial transference magic in the past, but since my Providence cut off the powers of time and space, he had been using a shortcut.

Compression.

One could argue that it was still magic that manipulated space, but if I interfered even in such trivial factors, there would no longer be any magic allowed in Fantasy.

“Huh? Oh god!”

Confused by the sudden emergence of numerous slimes, my junior stopped momentarily, only to realize her worries were all for naught.

“Mollan mollan~”

“Mollan~”

The slimes, which were the same ones used for slime toilets, stripped her thoroughly.

They left not even a single thread on her.

“Their training went well.”

Their kind normally melted even their target’s body, but the ones he released were quite clever.

They even seemed capable of differentiating the different types of hair while giving her hair removal treatment.

“Haha! Any woman caught by the slimes I raised myself would immediately feel weirded out and uncomfortable, no matter how arrogant they are.”

“Ahhh!”

“Emperor! I don’t have any particular interest or resentment in this average-looking lady, but I have no choice but to make her feel strange and demoralize her!”

“This little boy—”

“My name is not Little Boy. I am the Red Dragon King Lacoste. All stories about beautiful princesses being kidnapped have my name on them. That’s why I am the most famous of all dragons.”

The victor seemed to have been decided.

If my junior had succeeded in approaching him, she could’ve won, but she was now buried in mollan slimes.

At that moment…

“What’s wrong with how I look, you perverted little boy?!”

Enraged by his remarks, she grabbed a stone that had fallen near her and threw it with all her might.

Tok!

It successfully reached its target, partly because he didn’t feel the need to avoid it. Still, her accuracy was quite amazing, considering she was in the midst of a frenzy and was stuck under multiple slimes.

“What made you think such a feeble attack will work against me? Pathetic!”

“Ugh!”

“Hahaha! Haha— Cough?!”

Laughing so hard that his back arched and tilted, he collapsed and seemingly suffered from seizures.

With his spine in an extremely precarious condition, he essentially brought about his own demise by cackling too much.

“Why don’t you smile again for me, you perverted kid?”

“Come on, wait—!”

What? I can’t hear you properly.”

The mollan slimes attached to her skin moved along with her, almost as if they had become her new clothes.

She then placed her right foot on her opponent’s back, who was trying to crawl away from her.

“I was kidding! You’re extremely pretty. There’s no one more beautiful than you are. Please forgive me… Aaaaagghhhh?!”

“Shut up.”

She stomped on him with her heel.

In an instant, their situations had been reversed.

The stupid lizard injuring himself by laughing was beyond my expectations, but my junior won regardless.

“Wow…”

There was no way their positions could be overturned again. After all, though he had the nasty hobby of kidnapping beautiful ladies, the Red Dragon King had a self-enforced iron rule to never hurt women.

Even if it meant death.

If it weren’t for that, he could have burned or frozen my junior in no time at all with his ZZ-rank Magic.

“…”

“Huh? You’re kidding, right? You didn’t die just because I stepped on your back, did you?”

“…”

“Nonsense…” She muttered in disbelief as she stared at the heinous dragon she just subdued.

Since she was still new to this world, evidenced by her level still being 1, this was probably her first ‘murder’ experience.

It was probably quite shocking for her.

I was like that at first, too.

“Great job.”

Approaching her, I praised her with sincerity.

“What are you talking about?”

“You could’ve restrained him more easily if you targeted the space between his 4th and 5th lumbar vertebrae, but attacking him between his 3rd and 4th isn’t that bad either.”

“Lumbar?”

“The spine in the lower back. Didn’t you learn about it in school?”

“That’s not what I meant… I just didn’t expect to hear that word here. No, more importantly, is this kid really dead?”

“Look at your level.”

“… Oh!”

▷ Race: Elite Human

▷ Level: 3071

▷ Job: Hero (200% Experience)

▷Skills: Sadism S, Physics S, Interpretation A, Charm B, Stamina C…

▷Status: Shocked, Mollan

If my junior’s job offered a 500% increase in experience gain, her level would’ve jumped higher, but one shouldn’t be greedy from the first sip.

Still, based on the first grade’s standards, her level was already quite high.

“Hmm. I didn’t expect this either.”

If she didn’t step on his back, he wouldn’t have died in vain.

Should I consider this a draw?

I didn’t think Lolicoste would self-destruct by laughing, but I still had to acknowledge my junior’s tenacity for enduring through it all.

『A certain righteous divine being highly appreciates someone.』

『A certain god agrees.』

『A certain obscene angel shows interest.』

『A certain god demands an encore.』

“… You did a good job.”

A couple of deities serving as passionate teachers in the Fantasy Institution began to show interest in my junior.

I didn’t know whether to consider this good or bad luck.

“Is he faking it?”

“Put on some clothes first.”

“Oh?!”

Finally realizing she was still naked, she hastily took and wore the outfit Lolicoste left behind when his corpse turned into dust and scattered back into nature since we had no spare clothes.

It was tight around her chest and hips since it was tailored according to his physique, but she still wore it without hesitation, deciding it was better than being naked.

It also came with a bonus anyway.

“Mollan~”

“Mollan mollan~”

The mollan slimes the Red Dragon King raised as a hobby quietly bounced back into the pockets of his clothes which my junior now owned.

They were strong enough not to be ignored.

▷ Race: Genius Slime

▷ Level: 1540

▷ Job: Assassin (Night → Burrow↑)

▷ Skills: Massage SS, Undressing S, Latent A, Compression A, Corrosion A…

▷Status: Compressed, Latent

Based on the 1st grade’s standards, they were apex predators.

They were a much more powerful weapon than the Holy Swords, given to those who could pass any of the Saintesses’ trials.

Moreover, they were capable of giving massages.

I was well aware of how important that was in relieving fatigue, considering I used to receive it from Hippolia every day when I was still active.

“My body’s so light I feel like I can fly, senior.”

“That’s because your level has risen.”

She went from level 1 to level 3000 in an instant.

It was only natural for her to feel tremendous changes in her physique.

“This is making me feel like I’m involved in something outrageous.”

“That’s just you. Anyway, always remember that the Hero Support Center will replace your mollanphone if you lose or break it for a price.”

“It’s extremely durable and sturdy, though.”

“Of course. It’s made with materials that would remain unscathed even if a dragon were to step on it.”

Strictly speaking, it was ‘indestructible.’

Some used this as a substitute for a shield, but only a few could accomplish such a feat since the area it could block was fairly small.

“I’m a little… confused.”

“Why?”

“I was going to return to my home planet quickly, but I’ve grown quite interested in this world, making me decide to postpone it.”

“Do you feel anything weird in your body?”

“Definitely not!”

“You don’t have to be so shy. Even the second most beautiful devil and angel in the world are strange.”

“Are you talking about your ‘cowardly’ wife, whom you spoke of last night?”

“One is my wife, and the other is a distant relative.”

The second angel, Umamiel, was Parmael’s real daughter.

According to our genealogy, she was my relative.

“How long do you plan on following me anyway?”

“I’ll leave as soon as I’ve confirmed you really have the qualities of a Hero. Let me tell you this in advance: I am a married man with three wives. Don’t even think about trying to seduce me.”

“You’re too proud of yourself, senior.”

“I’m not praising myself. It’s not my fault I’m objectively handsome.”

“This world’s aesthetic standards are just bizarre! Any sane being would’ve mistaken you for a bandit boss like I did when we first met.”

“Sigh… Follow me.”

“Where are you going to take me this time?”

“I think you’re making a huge error. I’ll show you the real bandit boss.”

“Do I really have to see them?”

“Yes. Unless you do, you’ll be no more than a living corpse, obsessed with prejudice and obsession until the day you die. You’re still young, but you’ve already—”

“Just go already!”

The group of heroes who defeated the Red Dragon King Lolicoste moved to the Eastern Continent.

To pay a visit to the Bandit King’s den.

*****

I wanted to use the Righteous Hero’s Wings, but I decided to take a taxi to avoid doubts.

“Calling a taxi in a fantasy world…”

“Is it that strange?”

“It is! Having a cellphone here already doesn’t make sense, but now, as soon as you contacted someone, a vampire on an airship flew over and helped us cross the sea…”

“Then how should I do it to make it more fantasy-like?”

“Well…”

“Listen carefully, junior. It’s not right to think of such intricacies as heresy just because you’re not used to them.”

“Tsk. You sound like a teacher who never puts his teachings into practice.”

“I’m speaking from experience.”

“I just said that because I hate your ‘know-it-all’ attitude.”

“Haha!”

I burst out laughing.

“What’s so funny?”

“After listening to what you said, I realized I’m getting older too. Is this what senility is?”

“How old are you, exactly?”

“I don’ know. I stopped counting when I reached 100 years old. Anyway, we’re almost there, so brace yourself. Even your underwear can get stolen in that place if you stop paying attention for even just a second.”

“Isn’t that a palace?”

“Have you never heard of the saying that goes, ‘only those caught are bandits, those who aren’t are called wealthy’? Essentially, since his business is booming, he can live in a nice property like this instead of a damp and dull cave.”

“Shameless…”

We got off the taxi, which Coinosseur Shakespeare drove, right in front of our destination.

The Bandit King’s den.

The epitome of banditry and his harem lived here.

I didn’t know if he’d still recognize me, though.

“Who… What?!”

One of the minions guarding the entrance recognized me.

And seconds later, his former companion, the Bandit King, ran out barefoot.

“What did the Hero come to this shabby place for?!”

“I have a junior who’s curious about what a real bandit looks like.”

“That’s right.”

For reference, the Bandit King’s race was mixed, inheriting the advantages of both elves and humans.

My junior gave him a puzzled look.

“A prince on a white horse…?”

“That’s the bandit boss.”

“No way!”

I felt proud of myself for being able to teach her how the world of Fantasy worked.

I didn’t even expect the Bandit King would look so embarrassed in front of me.

I didn’t think we were this close.

“Father!”

“Huh?”

Green Cake?

“Wait a minute! Is that green-haired prince your son?”

“Well…”

“You two don’t have any resemblance… Hohoho! Hello! Nice to see you! I’m learning so many things from my great senior!”

“…”

Her attitude became way too suspicious.