FFF-Class Trashero

[24th Round] Demon Lord Parmamon

Once their character has reached level 999 in an RPG, players tend to ignore the traps in low-level zones since the damage would be negligible even if they activated them.

Avoiding them was a waste of time and effort, so they fought their way through them instead, even at the cost of being damaged.

But those were just games.

“This is too much…”

I had endured it for ten years, but now my psyche had cracked.

Did I really just stay calm for an entire decade for this?

“S-senior… save… kha…”

Sieg, buried from head to toe with arrows, stretched out his hand in my direction, begging for help.

No matter how I looked at it, such death was too absurd.

“Kyu-kyu…” His rainbow fox, which had already grown four tails, whimpered.

Demon Lord’s Tower: 1st Floor.

That was where Sieg died.

He wasn’t even hit by some powerful adversary.

He was just careless because he was on the 1st floor, which the guides didn’t even care to mention, and completely ignored the arrow traps.

It wasn’t that the arrows were flying too fast or that they were poisoned.

In fact, they corresponded to the level of the first floor.

That was why he decided to take all the damage.

And this was the result.

At first, they were all ordinary arrows, but somewhere around the middle of the floor, they started to “ignore stats.”

And Sieg, accustomed to the unenchanted projectiles, boldly and arrogantly walked forward.

“I have no words…”

Disco, the head of the inspection team, also seemed shocked by what had happened.

Like me, she endured ten years, waiting for this day.

But Sieg…

“Can you resurrect him?” with some hope, I asked Saintess E.

She shook her head, looking at Sieg.

“It wouldn’t work. Those arrows bear a fatal curse that stifles those who aren’t worthy to enter the tower. I didn’t even think the Hero would fall against such a thing…

“Hmm…”

▷ Was your adventure exciting, Dear Hero?

▷ The path of a true hero is indeed perilous. However, many relationships supported you through your journey, and you did not lose hope or lose track of your goal. You grew and learned of friendship and love. In the end, however, you still couldn’t defeat the Demon Lord. We truly feel sorry for you!

▷ Let’s take a look at your grades.

I was curious too.

What Sieg’s grades on his report card be?

▷ Please check your report card thoroughly!

▷ Name: Sieg

▷ Combat Power: MAX

▷ Achievements: B +

▷ Reputation: C

▷ Personality: D-

▷ Record: 1st Floor

His Combat Power being graded as MAX was only natural, considering he was powerful enough to match the secondary education’s average strength.

But the rest of his ratings weren’t impressive.

It was frustrating to see this imbalance because it looked like my early report card.

▷ You have failed the test.

▷ Reason: You died without even getting to fight the Demon Lord. Learn from your mistakes and be vigilant next time.

At that point, the “Regression started” message should have appeared, and Sieg would have returned to the starting point.

However, after Ssosiel became director, this policy changed.

▷ Would you like to drop out?

▷ Explanation: If you surrender, you will be transported back to your hometown. However, you will lose all the skills and connections that you’ve gained here. If you drop out, it will be very difficult to enroll again, so think carefully before making a decision.

The student was given a choice.

In my 1st round, if I had such a terrific opportunity, I would have dropped out without hesitation.

I wasn’t even joking.

I was taught by the Great Master Mollan anyway. I didn’t mind losing my Fantasy skills.

But Sieg wasn’t the same as I was.

He couldn’t give up.

▷ The faculty members will be praying for your success!

▷ A professional teacher has been assigned to assist you.

▷ A professional teacher has been assigned to assist you.

▷ A health teacher has been assigned to assist you.

The classroom collapsed since the Hero no longer needed it.

***

Later, after looking at other people’s personal files, I learned that many other heroes died on the 1st floor aside from Sieg.

They didn’t disclose information about the traps’ “ignore status” effect.

Dying to those arrows was far too embarrassing to let others know of it. Moreover, they clearly wanted others to experience the pain and shame they had to go through.

My mind left Hero V.

“Ten years of my effort all went down the drain…”

I was now on the 100th floor of the Demon Lord’s Tower.

I sat on my throne, but I was not alone.

“Shh! Distoria will be here soon,” said my cowardly wife, sitting on my lap and looking through a couple of papers.

Did she realize I was controlling Hero V?

Was she watching me all this time?

“…”

Ssosiel didn’t answer.

I did my best to understand, though, since she had been alone for so many years.

Flash!

Disco suddenly appeared in front of us.

With a bitter smile, she said, “If you were watching us, you probably already know it’ll be difficult to give Fantasy a good assessment based on student Sieg’s actions and progress.”

“Unfortunately, you chose the wrong student,” Ssosiel told her.

It was indeed unfortunate.

Why did it have to be Sieg of all people?

Due to society’s cruelty, however, nobody even tried to delve into my problems.

Calmly, Disco said, “I chose him at random, and I have no choice but to assess the whole situation based on what I saw.”

“I understand. What will you do next? Do you want to go straight to the next student? Or do you want to take a break?”

“Let me ask you one question before we begin once more.”

“Go ahead.”

As Disco waved her right hand, a hologram that displayed photos of Hero V appeared, ignoring the system.

Did she see through me?

“This Ancient Hero proved to be much more capable than student Sieg himself. I’m interested in his android. As you are probably well aware now, that androids are Mollansoft’s flagship product.”

“Go on.”

I decided to close my mouth and listen further, not wanting to blurt out unnecessary words that might compromise my mission.

“He doesn’t seem to realize it at all, but he’s perfect. His judgment and abilities go beyond his mechanical body. Hmm… I find it very difficult to explain it in words but consider this a woman’s intuition. If you start mass-producing androids equipped with his mind, your sales will be phenomenal.”

“… Thanks for the compliment.”

Ssosiel, pretending to be relaxed, tensed up for the first time in a while, which I immediately noticed when her cowardly buttocks clenched with tension.

Nonchalantly, Disco continued, “It occurs to me that his current pretty face, suitable only for mass production, doesn’t suit him. That makes me curious about how he truly looks like.”

“He was very handsome.”

I gently massaged my wife’s pelvis.

‘Hey! Take it easy! If she figures us out, our situation will become extremely problematic!’

“Regardless of this inspection’s results, I would like to buy it. The price will definitely not disappoint you…”

“No!”

“…”

“I apologize for screaming out of nowhere. It’s just that he’s an extremely important educational material.”

“Of course… I understand.”

Thank God!

‘Calm down, my wife.’

“If you have no more questions, miss Disco, let’s move on to the next student.” I intervened, but her focus remained on my wife.

“I wanted to resume the inspection immediately, but I’ve changed my mind. Instead, I request to see the Ancient Hero’s real face. That much is possible at least, right, Director Ssosiel?”

“… Give me a day.”

“Alright. Can you arrange a place for me to stay?”

“I’ll leave it to you, Parker Lee.”

Supervisor Bakery immediately appeared out of thin air.

Or should he now be called Vice-principal Bakery?

He greeted me, then addressed Disco and tended to her concerns.

“Follow me, Miss Distoria. I’ll take you to a lodge with a beautiful view of the world of Fantasy.”

“I look forward to it.”

Pop! Pop!

Bakery and Disco disappeared in a flash.

One second, two seconds, three seconds.

“Uuuugh!”

Ssosiel pressed against me, exhaling.

“Are you okay?”

“No! I’m not okay! When I heard she wanted to buy my husband, my mind blacked out.”

“My charm seems to work in outer space as well.”

Even on a much grander scale, I was still attractive.

Ssosiel was lucky.

“… This is unfair. My friends have husbands who treat them like queens.”

“Really?”

She dared to say that after her MAX-Class husband spent an entire decade enduring Sieg’s existence for the sake of our family’s well-being?

‘Say something, Addicted Spirit.’

“Your behavior is unacceptable, my niece!”

“I should be allowed to complain sometimes, auntie…”

“You’re awful!”

“… I was wrong. Forgive me, hubby.”

However, Ssosiel pouted, unable to hide her dissatisfaction.

“Why did you make that promise to her?”

“You mean showing her Hero V’s true appearance?”

“Yes.”

“Let’s use your personality and appearance based on your personal file from when you were still a student.”

“Does this mean that “I” will be able to freely start romantic relationships with other girls?”

“No.”

“Why?”

“It’s hard to believe, but during the past ten years, you didn’t cheat on me with any other woman. Except when you tamed the Ice Dragon King Sleas, you didn’t even touch their spines, let alone their pelvis.”

“And?”

What was the big deal?

I knew when to control myself. I tried to act in such a way that they wouldn’t see through me.

Displaying an odd smile, Ssosiel replied, “So I’m not worried.”

“You trust me so much…”

“Let’s show her your appearance before being reborn in the world of Fantasy. His name will, of course, be Kang Han Soo.”

“Who am I, then?”

“Demon Lord Parmamon.”

“…”

My wife changed the wonderful name my parents gave me…

“Parmamon is the name of the most handsome being in the world of Fantasy.”

“Hmm! If so…”

Although I was already handsome before, Fantasy’s inhabitants declared me their sweetest and kindest emperor after being reborn.

Demon Lord Parmamon.

Well, from now on, I would be… Hmm?

“Hubby?!”

“…”

SKRR!

Cracks began to appear on my skin like fine china, slithering their way so deep within me that they even reached my soul.

In the end, this phenomenon even affected my divine powers.

[Darkness]

[Spine]

[Human]

The words Disco had said crossed my mind.

“He doesn’t seem to realize it at all, but he’s perfect.”

Really.

I was completely unaware of this.

I hid my divine power that symbolized perfection, so I didn’t understand why she said Hero V was perfect.

Disco was a deity, but she called me perfect nonetheless.

Why?

“… My name.”

Until now, my name, “Kang Han Soo,” had been very important to me.

It connected me to my home planet and served as proof that I was a human child.

But this time, it was different.

While working as Hero V, I never used the name “Kang Han Soo.”

More accurately, I had to hide it.

However, it wasn’t just my name.

Behavior, language, judgment, train of thought…

I acted like a local. It was as easy for me as breathing.

Earth: 18 years old.

Fantasy: 211 years old.

Logically speaking, it should be more awkward for me to act like an Earthling now.

But I was completely unaware of that.

This had become my real self.

I was just pretending to be an earthling all this time.

… I found it funny.

“Hahahahahaha!”

“Hubby…”

“This is funny! The ultimate MAX-ranked Hero is nonsensical!”

It was all wrong.

That was on me.

I couldn’t refuse the simplest but, at the same time, the most difficult notion in my life.

My Name!

This was different from Sieg and the other heroes’ name changes. Unlike them, I had a reputation that I had accumulated so far.

That was why it was difficult to refuse it.

But I was prepared to do so.

I would now use a laurel wreath that suited me perfectly.

My name was…

“Parmamon.”

I was a god who was an FFF-rank Hero who defeated all demons.

“… Husband?”

“What?”

“What are you muttering under your breath?”

I wanted to ask her why she was still sitting on my lap, but I refrained from doing so.

“I will give you the greatest gift to ever exist, stupid wife!”

“The greatest gift? What do you mean?”

“You’ll understand when you see it.”

She would never forget this.