FFF-Class Trashero

[13th Round] Iceeee~?!

The members of the First Hero’s squad decided to enter the village where the Snow Woman lived.

I saw many familiar faces.

Lanuvel, who was always pretending to be cute, Sword King Alex, Mermaid Princess Aqua, Sword Princess, Sage, Princess of Darkness, Paladin Tomato, Ice Princess, Knight of Darkness…

His companions could be found on the Central, Western, and Northern continents of Fantasy. That meant they hadn’t been to the East and South yet.

A support group was also with them.

I took a closer look at them, not because they were beautiful but because most of them were future members of the teaching staff who kidnapped me into this wild world and then bullied me, not allowing me to graduate normally.

In order to properly dislocate their spines later, I had to thoroughly embed their faces in my mind.

“So you’re an angel.”

My senior mistook me for an angel, having checked my stats.

“Angel?”

“This man is an angel?!”

“He looks like a demon…”

“He’s nothing like the angels I know…”

The others expressed their opinions regarding my predecessor’s statement.

They dared compare the Righteous Hero to those hens, but I was in such a troublesome situation right now that I had to endure such humiliations.

If only I could, I would’ve already lined them all in a row and played around with their spines one by one.

“… Anyway, as a fair angel, I want to share my wisdom with those who believe in my kind’s righteousness. The more women gather around you due to your popularity with them, the unhappier you’ll become. If you want to be happy, you have to marry this girl pretending to be nice.”

I pointed to Lanuvel.

I fought fire with fire.

If the First Hero and Lanuvel married each other, they would balance each other out. As a result, this world would definitely become calmer. It was just science.

“It’s too early for me to get married!”

“Ha-ha… Marriage isn’t in my mind yet either, Master Angel.”

They both refused my matchmaking.

I tried, but this universe seemed destined to be deprived of peace for a long time.

“You have an incredible spirit for a friend.” My senior said, changing the topic of conversation.

His gaze was fixed on the First Spirit, who was sitting on my head.

After listening to his praise, she immediately replied. “I’m never going to join you and your party anyway, so you should give up, fool.”

“What?”

“Just remember my words. The day will come when you’ll finally understand the noblest spirit’s words.”

“Oh, good.”

While the First Spirit dealt with the First Hero, I memorized the teachers’ faces from the support group and looked at the companions.

There was bound to be dissatisfaction in any team.

When I told my senior and Lanuvel to get married, some of the expressions of the companions and support group immediately changed.

If I talked to them, I would be able to get the information I needed.

But among them was Sage…

“Oh… Why is that spirit naked… Kh?!”

His nose started bleeding immediately.

If he could overcome that curse, then realization would come to him, and he would be reincarnated with the ‘Enlightened’ job. However, he was still far from achieving that.

“Hey. You’ve seen me naked several times, so why are you ashamed?”

“That’s because I don’t think pervertedly about you, Aqua.”

“Does that mean I’m unattractive as a woman?”

“No. It’s the opposite.”

“Hmph! I’m over it. If you’re not attracted to me, just say so.”

“You misunderstand my sincerity… Kh?”

Aqua, the Mermaid Princess, twisted napkins and inserted them into Sage’s nostrils to stop the blood from streaming down.

With his lean physique shaking due to unnecessary blood loss, Sage wasn’t able to resist Aqua’s radical measures of assistance. Although even if he could, he probably wouldn’t.

He now had an extremely stupid expression on his face, so I crossed him off the list.

My choice fell on ‘Saintess C’.

The top three beauties of the Northern Continent were the Sword Princess, the Ice Princess, and Saintess C. However, if I had to choose between them, then Saintcess C was definitely the best choice, not because she fit my personal preference but because the Sword Princess was too rude, and the Ice Princess avoided people.

For those reasons, Saintess C was my best option.

At the moment, the rare beauty didn’t look that delighted.

“I warned you.”

I moved over to let their party pass. There was no need to rush, after all.

It would take their party leader some time to get to know the Snow Woman and chase after her, so I was certain he wouldn’t be leaving this village anytime soon.

My priority right now was the dragon.

***

Snow King Eshinoff.

The Ice Dragon, renowned for its cruelty.

His lair was in the center of a dense frozen forest surrounded by the harpies’ dwellings.

As I walked into his territory, my soul remained calm.

“Save me!”

“Someone help!”

“Harpies… Aaaahhh!”

“Free me!”

My eyes would sometimes meet the gaze of those begging for help, but I ignored them all and focused on reaching my destination.

As the Righteous Hero, of course, I wanted to save those caught by the harpies, but I couldn’t change the course of history. I moved forward with tears in my eyes!

Thanks to their sacrifice, I was able to save time!

“Iceeeee?”

The dragon’s lair had a natural fortification made of frozen trees. Behind them was a white dragon, which lazily opened his eyes as soon as he sensed my presence.

He looked at me. And I looked back at him.

▷ Race: Ice Dragon

▷ Level: 999+

▷ Job: Snow King (Snowy Land → Invincibility ↑)

▷ Skills: Freeze Z, Snowfall Z, Dragon Scale Z, Flying Z, Penetration Z…

▷ Status: Withering, Interest

Basically, his stats were similar to the Snow Queen Elsh. The only difference is that he had the Dragon Scale skill.

His body was huge, probably about three times the size of the sturdy Green Cake.

Compared to the Supreme Dragon of Oblivion, Noebius, though… He was probably about the size of his paw.

“How about a serious conversation?”

“Iceeeee.”

The dragon slowly rose from the ground.

But I didn’t calmly observe this. I intended to attack from the beginning but failed because of his keen instinct.

“I leave him to you, Captain Fantasy!”

BOOM!

Summoned in the air, the huge baby landed with his booty right on the lizard’s back.

“Iceeee?!”

The dragon howled, opening his jaws.

Captain Fantasy lost to the Supreme Dragon of Oblivion due to the difference in weight class, but he was superior to other dragons.

Not only could they not defeat him, but he was stronger than them.

“Ooooh… Ah.”

He rejoiced, treating the Snow King like a children’s merry-go-round.

Even with his hard and cold scales, he couldn’t do anything against the baby and his soft, elastic skin.

Unable to bear Captain Fantasy’s weight, the Eshinoff soon fell and sprawled on the ground.

“Iceeee…”

The time to talk had finally come.

The evil dragon, who would soon be known as part of the Five Great Disasters, couldn’t do anything, but not because he was weak.

Captain Fantasy was just too powerful.

But if he surrendered so easily, then his glory as an evil dragon would be at risk of being forgotten. Snow King Eshinoff’s eyes narrowed.

Fshhshhh…

The dragon’s torso was soon engulfed by light and instantly shrunk.

Dragonian.

Their kind usually only assumed that combat form to fight enemies that were the size of smidges compared to their original bodies.

But the reason was quite the opposite this time around. He most likely just wanted to become smaller to at least damage Captain Fantasy a little.

But he had already experienced fighting the cowardly Ssosia. Hence, for him, this attempt was laughable.

Instantly grabbing the dragonkin, he began waving him in different directions, like a toy airplane.

He didn’t put him in his mouth or licked him, making it evident that he liked the dragonian less than Ssosia.

“Oh, you monster! L-let me go!”

“Wow!”

“W-wait! Stop… Aaaahh!”

Captain Fantasy got bored and threw him to the ground.

BAM!

The impact formed a large crater, and in its center was the dragonian, lying unconscious… No, he had a frightened expression on his face, seemingly unable to understand what just happened.

“You seem to be ready to talk now.”

“Ahem! Are you an adventurer too?”

“No. I am a hero.”

“Hero?”

The bloodied dragonian couldn’t understand anything.

I didn’t think he was lying. He didn’t know the concept of ‘Hero’ yet.

It was still non-existent in this era, after all.

Regardless…

“Starting today, you are to be known as the Snow Queen Elsh.”

“In what sense?”

If people were told to change their name immediately, nine out of ten people would be wearing the same look as the dragonian.

Dragons didn’t have a specific gender.

But depending on preferences and personality, they could choose to become a male or a female.

Some changed their genders every now and then, while some committed to one gender for the entirety of their lives. The Supreme Dragon of Oblivion was a typical example of the latter.

“In the literal sense. Moreover, from now on, you are to be the queen of the harpies.”

“Why should I do such nonsense… Kh-ah?!”

“You know… I have very skillful hands.”

I wasn’t planning on leaving everything to Captain Fantasy while I sat back and did nothing.

When I saw Lanuvel, my hands started itching.

“What have you done with my body…”

Inadvertently moving, the dragonian straightened like an arrow. His mouth opened in a silent scream, unable to describe what he was feeling.

“Today, you will be reborn as a girl, but don’t worry. I’ve already received your payment for this.”

After plastic surgery, the Snow King will become the Snow Queen.

It wasn’t as difficult as it sounded.

***

I, the Righteous Hero, finished things in two days.

That included the sex change of the evil dragon!

I didn’t give him… No, her. I didn’t give her the reasons behind my actions since it was impossible how the Snow Queen would behave towards what would happen in the future.

And I didn’t forbid her to go outside.

Due to back pain, she wouldn’t be able to be active anyway. There was no need to tell her about the Snow Woman and complicate things.

“Drug Hero, never forget that I’m on your side.”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

During those two days, the First Spirit was suspiciously quiet. Did she finally realize how lenient I was to her?

“Yes! I did! I finally noticed how kind you are to me, Drug Hero! So don’t make fun of me.”

“One finger is enough for you.”

“I think so too, kind Drug Hero!”

“Oh…”

I returned to the village and decided to check what the First Hero was doing.

But…

“Miss Snow Woman. The weather’s nice today, isn’t it?”

“Most people do not like snowfall because it blocks traffic on the roads…”

“I like white snow. It reminds me of you. If you find any difficulties or need any help, you can contact me at any time. Don’t be shy.”

“I’d be too embarrassed…”

My senior was pestering the Snow Woman.

He was definitely a womanizer.

It would be nice if he didn’t introduce himself as a hero everywhere. He was bringing disgrace to our title.

Anyway, I had better things to do today than watch them.

Having made sure that the Snow Woman hadn’t yet suffered from the First Hero’s treacherous hands, who was haunted by misfortune, I went to a hotel with a bar pointed out by the Wind Spirit King that lived in my armpit.

“So this is the place…”

Breaking through the blizzard, I arrived at my destination and boldly opened the door.

Due to the fireplace and the number of people cooped up inside, the interior was warm.

All of the men inside the bar on the first floor had their gazes focused on one girl.

Saintess C.

But she wasn’t a saintess yet in this era. The job didn’t exist yet in the first place.

She illuminated this unkempt bar with her beauty, which was why no one dared approach her. Rather, they busied themselves by holding each other back and peeking glances at her.

As if mocking them, I went up and spoke to her.

“I apologize, but I’m a suspicious man who knows that you have a purple mole on your right buttock.”

“Hahaha!”

Unlike the First Hero’s unsuccessful attempts, our conversation went pretty smoothly.