Chapter 551 - No Matter What
LERRIN
Lerrin woke without waking. Aware first that he was, then that he remained. That he was not dead… yet.
But as he swam back to consciousness he knew something was wrong. Very, very wrong.
As he came back to his body he could not move. Could barely breath, he was so consumed by pain. Everything hurt. Then, before he'd even opened his eyes, he tried to curl himself around the center of the pain—his middle—but even tensing his muscles to move caused a cascade of agony. He groaned.
"Lerrin? Lerrin? Open your eyes. Please!"
He tried. That voice called him and he tried. But he was so tired, and there was so much pain. Then soft, warm fingers appeared on his, squeezing his palm.
"I'm here, Lerrin. I'm so sorry it took me so long to… I'm here."
He breathed as deeply as he dared through his nose and drank in her scent. And as it hit the back of his throat he was washed in memories of her… her eyes, her smile, the careful way she carried herself. Her kiss…
"Lerrin, please," she whispered desperately. "Don't leave me. Please!"
He tried to open his eyes, but they only fluttered—and even that small movement hurt. Then a tiny, cool, drop of water landed on his cheek and rolled down into his mouth.
Her tears. He drank Suhle's tears and his chest wanted to cave in. He could hear her breath catching, her whispered words, the way she called for him to stay, to live.
He couldn't open his eyes, so he opened his mind and she was there. Loving him in a way that would have made him weep if he hadn't been in so much pain.
The rush of her emotion, of her pleading, the sheer wave of emotion she swam in was overwhelming. He was forced to narrow the connection so he wasn't washed away by it.
Suhle, he breathed in her mind.
"Lerrin! Please! Don't leave! I can help you. I can heal you. Please. Don't give up. Stay here with me!"
I am not dead, he sent. But I might… I can't shift.
He knew it was true, because he couldn't feel his beast. Was that simply because he walked the line between life and death? Or had they injured him in some way that separated him from his beast?
"What hurts the most?" she whispered through her tears.
His head pounded in a way that made him spin and feel sick. But his stomach and back…
They've broken my insides, he sent carefully. Something in my stomach, my back. Something there won't allow me to move.
"Can you feel your hands, your feet?"
He tried to flex his fingers and toes, and the pain was so intense, he groaned—which hurt so much he was reduced to panting for several breaths before he could send to her again.
I can feel them. I think I can move them. But the pain…
She gave a sob, but her hands were quick and sure on his skin, and oh, so gentle.
"I'm sorry, Lerrin, this is going to hurt, but I need to… it will help you."
What? he asked in her head, then heard himself groan as she rolled him onto his back. His entire body protested, shivering—which only made the pain worse.
But before he could beg to be moved back, she'd pried his jaw open and dropped something bitter on his tongue.
He swallowed convulsively, his head aching worse even from that small movement. Then she rolled him back to his side and, though his body lit up with pain until it seemed there was no part of him that didn't scream, he could feel that laying that way was… better.
Something painted him, something wet and cool. His brow first, then various parts of his body. He heard the ripple of water or some other liquid in a bowl, then the tinkle of it wrung from a cloth, more than once.
Slowly, slowly, the pain eased. So slowly. Whatever she had given him, it was helping. And whatever she painted on his skin seemed to be helping as well. He could feel his skin tighten under her cloth, as if it knit together even faster than his usual healing.
What was she doing to him?
Soon, despite his silence, she began to speak to him. And he fixed on every word, yearning for the next, just to hear her speak.
"You warned me. I can't believe you thought to warn me… thank you, Lerrin. I am so grateful. Know that, please. So grateful."
They may yet come for you, he warned. Be on watch.
There was a minute where she continued to bathe him in whatever she was using for his wounds, but then she went still. When she spoke, she must have leaned over him. Her breath fluttered on his face.
"Lerrin, please… open your eyes."
The effort to do as she asked was huge, but he blinked and blinked against the bright light coming from the window high in the wall behind her. Then finally was able to focus on her beautiful face.
Her hood was thrown back behind her shoulders, her hair falling forward—not in a braid today—and her eyes… her beautiful, bright eyes, like a cloudless sky on a day after rain, were fixed on his below a brow crinkled with worry.
But when he finally focused and their gazes locked, she smiled through her threatening tears.
She put one palm to his face, so gently he barely felt it, then she spoke the words that lit his soul like flames to dry grass.
"You are mine," she whispered fiercely. "No matter what happens, no matter what, Lerrin! You are my mate. My true mate. Chosen for me. I will not leave you—do you hear me? There is no one else for me. No one else I would even… would even consider. If you deny me… I will never deny you. I need you to know that. No matter what, Lerrin. No matter what."
*****
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