Chapter 148: Body Count

Lucifer flopped back onto her plush cushions, crossing her legs as she looked down at Viviana and the Disciplinary officers with an unamused, mocking scoff.

"Besides..." Lucifer sneered, her voice dropping into a tone of arrogant contempt, "...you should really be thanking me, Seth. Because these Avalon Academy bums are so unbelievably incompetent they can’t even protect their own incoming transfer students."

She pointed a manicured finger at Viviana’s pale face, letting out a sharp, mocking laugh. "A squad of heavy stealth combat jets managed to slip right past your outer spatial arrays and camp under your island’s rear belly, and your security team didn’t even notice until I blew them to pieces! You guys aren’t an elite academy defense force, you’re just a bunch of absolute frauds."

Lucifer’s blunt, mocking declaration hung over the marble landing platform like a heavy anvil.

Except for Chancellor Viviana and me, almost everyone standing on the sky-dock was rendered completely speechless. The Disciplinary officers looked like they had been slapped across the face, while Yoona and Val stood in stunned silence, trying to process the sheer audacity of the Devil Queen casually insulting Earth’s premier academy right to its Chancellor’s face.

Yerin, on the other hand, was practically vibrating. I glanced sideways at my pop-star girlfriend and saw literal stars sparkling in her dark eyes. She was looking at Lucifer not as a terrifying cosmic entity, but as the ultimate, unhinged woman who said whatever she wanted and looked stunning while doing it.

Chancellor Viviana didn’t utter a single word of defense against Lucifer’s harsh critique. She knew the Devil Queen was right. The fact that eight heavy combat vessels had bypassed the outer spatial arrays without triggering an alarm was a catastrophic security failure.

Instead of blowing up in a rage, Viviana took a long, quiet breath. When she looked up, her clear blue eyes were blazing with the terrifying intensity of a hurricane.

"You are correct, Devil Queen," Viviana acknowledged, her voice dropping into a dangerously calm register that made the surrounding officers flinch. "This breach was only possible if someone holding high-level administrative clearance inside Avalon assisted them. I will root out every traitor responsible for this, and I will make them regret the day they were ever born."

Lucifer’s golden eyes instantly lit up. She raised her hand enthusiastically from her floating velvet couch. "Ooh! Traitor hunting?! Do you need an expert assistant?! I run the torture chambers in the Nether Realm! I can peel a traitor’s soul like a grape and keep them screaming for three centuries without dying!"

Viviana gave a subtle shake of her head. "This is an internal Avalon matter, and I will deal with it personally. However..." She paused, bowing her head slightly toward the silver-haired Queen. "...I extend my genuine gratitude for your intervention. You protected my students, specifically our most valuable ones."

Lucifer casually pulled a piping-hot slice of pepperoni pizza out of a spatial pocket, taking a big bite before dismissively waving her hand.

"Don’t flatter yourself, Chancellor," Lucifer chewed happily, speaking with her mouth full. "I didn’t save your little academy. If it were anyone else floating out there, I would’ve pulled up a lawn chair and watched the enemies blast them into fish food. It would’ve been fantastic entertainment."

She swallowed, pointing her pizza crust directly at me. "I only stepped in because Seth here is my friend. Plus... he holds the potential to maintain long-term peace and dimensional balance across the realms for a very long time. And I happen to love peace. Peace means I get to sit in my silk pajamas, eat fast food, and binge my favorite shows without stupid inter-realm wars ruining my schedule."

My brow furrowed slightly as I looked up at the Devil Queen. Something about her casual mention of balance and existence made a random question pop into my head.

"Hey, Lucifer..." I asked, leaning back on my heels, "...what’s your body count?"

GASP.

Lucifer froze mid-bite. The terrifying, world-shattering ruler of the Underworld suddenly went bright crimson. Her face flared into a fiery blush that spread all the way to the tips of her silver ears. She frantically covered her face with her long kimono sleeves, stammering out in a high-pitched, panicked squeak.

"W-W-WHAT?!" Lucifer stuttered, her golden eyes wide with total panic. "H-How dare you ask a lady such a shameless, filthy question out in the open, Seth?! I-I’m a virgin, baka!!"

Dead silence. Everyone standing on the marble platform froze completely.

Yoona stared blankly, Val blinked in bewilderment, and even Chancellor Viviana looked like her brain had suffered an internal malfunction. They all looked at the Devil Queen as if she had a major screw loose in her head.

Realizing how flustered she looked, Lucifer quickly lowered her sleeves, coughing awkwardly into her fist as she tried to regain her majestic posture, though her cheeks were still burning pink.

"L-Look!" Lucifer stammered defensively, glaring at me. "I’ve harbored thoughts about sex plenty of times! I’m not a saint! But whenever I experience intense physical emotions or romantic arousal, my passive conceptual aura flares out of control! No ordinary being can stand within ten miles of me without getting pulverized into dust, let alone survive an intimate night in bed!"

She huffed, crossing her arms. "A few ancient old fogies like Zeus or Odin could probably survive my aura if they used full divine armor... but I’d much rather punch their stupid, arrogant faces in than get laid by them!"

My lips twitched as I fought back a sudden burst of laughter. I rubbed the bridge of my nose, clearing my throat.

"Lucifer..." I said slowly, "..I meant your kill count."

Lucifer blinked her golden eyes. She stared at me for three seconds before the realization hit her. The blushing, flustered girl instantly vanished, replaced once again by her bored, casual demeanor.

"Oh! Kill count!" Lucifer shrugged, taking another bite of her pizza. "I lost track a few thousand years ago, kid. I used to erase entire mortal worlds whenever I got annoyed or bored back in the ancient eras."