Day One Thousand One Hundred And Ninety-Four

Dear Diary,

Yeah, one of those things that people don't get is that if somebody pulls a con, you get got, but you get their business card, you don't chase after them right away.

I mean, you don't leave it go for more than twenty four hours, because if they know you know, they're gonna get gone, but when you pull a con you're on edge for a bit. Thing is, you can't keep that up forever. I mean, I used to think I could, and a lot of people say they do, but let's be real. I am an incarnate Goddess, with people Worshipping me into wakefulness on the regular, and I still can't pull that shit. I mean, I can try, but the more I've tried it, the more it has become obvious that some amount of time, I get... Sloppy.

Okay, that's not quite true. It's not not true, but it's not as accurate or specific as I could be. What happens, in a more specific and accurate sense, is that I wind up thinking less, relying on my instincts more, and holy fuckin' shit that's when II start embodying my Domains and doing shit like what happened with my Revel. It's scary to think about, especially with shit like 'Vengeance' and 'Justified Homicide' lurking, not to mention fuckin' Bloodlust, but the longer I lean on my Divinity to keep me upright and functioning, the more influence it has over me.

At least that's my working theory. Might run it past Saffron once I've got more data points. Then again, it's possible she's done all this research already back when she was worried I'd get upset by my own Domain as Mimic. Which means that I might save myself a lot of time by just asking her, but... Y'know, I think I'm not gonna ask her, and it's not even my O.D.D. or shit like that cropping up. Not only is it sometimes useful to have two different people looking at something, it's kind of like my Global Spell. Which I'm still working on. It's something I want to do on my own, that I don't want to run to Saffron to do it for me.

Also, it's not a response to a clear and present danger, so I don't feel pressured to get her to do it. Unlike the, y'know, Fae mind control.

Shit, I wonder if going days on end without sleep would make me more or less susceptible to Fae bullshit.

Actually, no, I've got a theory on that, one that popped into my head the moment I pondered it. Based on what Tallulah said about my ADHD making me particularly susceptible to Mister May-I-Have-Your-Attention, I think when I've hit that point, I'd completely no-sell anything that went against my Domains, against my Values even. I was gonna say I might not even realize they'd tossed shit at me, but then I think I'd miss it if they tossed something in line with my Divine woo, too. I'd just do whatever it was, even if it wasn't the thing I wanted to do. Even if it was maybe the wrong thing to do, both pragmatically and morally.

Because I do have Bloodlust and Justified Homicide as Domains, after all. Not to mention Vengeance. I'm pretty sure if somebody threw an illusion of somebody doing unto one of my kids, then tossed a whammy to make me turn that person into modern art, the location would resemble a blood based Jackson Pollock painting.

At any rate, I do need Saffron to work on that new anti-Fae-bullshit Shape, and based on what she's said, she needs someone specializing in that kind of Fae magic as a resource. Well, 'need' might be a little strong, but still.

The moment I dropped mister prankster into the oubliette, they froze. When I dropped the line about Saffron needing an expert in fascination magic, their reaction was none of the ones I expected.

They had a bit of a meltdown. Then exploded.

Kinda literally in both cases.

Instead of moving, they melted. Okay, 'melted' isn't quite right. It wasn't like ice slowly dripping away, or even an ice cream sculpture getting softer until it flopped down onto the ground. It looked like one of those videos of a water balloon getting popped, where for a split second the water is still in the shape of a balloon, then the whole thing drops to the ground, losing its shape as it falls.

Before the remains hit the floor, they blasted outward, splattering across the floor, walls, and even ceiling of the oubliette.

I flinched a little, mildly surprised that the fluid hadn't splashed me through the grating of the trap door. "Fuck. Uh... What the fuck?" 

Saffron blinked, mouth open, staring, as she shook her head. "I... I have no idea, love." Tallulah?

While Saffron summoned Tallulah for a quick conference, I said, "Karen?"

"Yes, Goddess?"

"Keep this shut, please?"

Karen nodded, stepped onto the trap door, then flopped down into a tailor seat right there. When I gave her a look, she smiled and said, "I can hardly open it by accident like this."

The oubliette secured, I stepped to Conrad's Workshop. "Son? Are you busy?"

I tensed a little when his mismatched hands settled on my shoulders. "Not really, Mother Dearest. What brings you today?"

I turned to him, gave him a hug, and said, "I really ought to visit to socialize more, shouldn't I?"

He dropped one shoulder in a gallic shrug. "I've never been one for idle chatter. But I appreciate the thought."

I sighed. "Yeah. I get that. Maybe movie night with those flicks I got you last Yule?"

He rocked his head side to side. "Perhaps. But you needed something?"

"Yeah. Um... The oubliette?"

"Yes?"

I tried to think of a way to put it nicely, but after a moment and a glance at his hairier hand, I realized that might be taking the protective mother thing a little too far. "I dropped somebody in there to keep them contained and they exploded."

I had to work to keep my face serious, because seeing a look that expressed 'dafuq' so eloquently on Conrad's normally serene face was hilarious. "Exploded? Are you certain?"

"That's what it looked like. Just popped like a balloon, then splattered all over everything. Floor, walls, ceiling. Splat."

He sucked on his teeth a moment, then slipped his hand into mine. "Blend us, please?"

I wrapped my Blend around us, and he stepped us to the hallway with the oubliette's trap door. Tallulah and Saffron stood there discussing something; I'm not sure what, because a few moments later we stood in the Workshop again.

"You imprisoned a Fae?"

I nodded. "Mom needed a specialist in some Fae magic for research on the Shape she's working on."

Conrad nodded. "Not scrying or obfuscation of same, since Lady Crow wasn't suitable, obviously."

"Yep. So... Why did the Fae pop like a particularly obnoxious zit?"

He smiled. "They didn't." After I stared a moment, with his smile getting wider, I waved my hand in a 'get on with it' gesture, and he chuckled. "I suspect Mom is researching something about illusion? Perhaps alteration of perception?"

It took me a second, but when I finally got it I facepalmed. "Really?"

"Indeed."

Karen? Secure the trap door; put a rug over it. Ladies, false alarm. Meet me in the Bedroom. "Thanks, son."

"De nada."

I think he even leaned into the hug I gave him before I left. When I arrived in the Bedroom, Karen, Tallulah, and Saffron were waiting for me. "I take it you've discovered what caused the prankster to react so violently to the oubliette?"

I shook my head, pushed my Blend around us, and did a quick tentacle filling of the space before saying, "they didn't." I took some comfort that it took Saffron at least as long as it took me. "Well. At least they're an appropriate resource."

At that point Karen said, "uh, explanation? If it won't ruin something?"

"Illusion. Probably with a lunge for the trap door under cover of that illusion."

Yeah, Karen's an interesting mix of Saffron's systematic smarts and my straight forwardness. Not that I'm straight, but I am forward. At any rate, she spent a solid minute cussing about Fae and illusionists before letting out a huge huff, then saying, "apologies, Goddess, Imperator, Overlord. I'm disappointed that I was taken in so thoroughly."

Saffron stepped forward and pulled Karen into a hug. "We all three were, Karen. Even our Goddess."

"So what do we do now?"

Saffron shrugged and turned to me. "We wait until our little Fae prankster decides they're hungry."

I was a little worried that they're gonna pass out from lack of water or something, but Karen assured me they keep a full pitcher down there. And a bucket. So I had one of me sitting on the throw rug she'd put over the oubliette trap door. All fuckin' night, and all fuckin' day.

Okay, I tested out whether I could sleep and stay Co-Located. Which I couldn't. Sleep, that is. Probably gonna get a couple of my High Clergy to stand watch tomorrow, because I don't want to give the slippery fucker in the cell the slightest edge in escaping, and me being strung out would definitely be an edge.

Fuck. I'm waiting again.

I hate waiting.