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Chapter 881 - Buddhist monks don’t tell lies! Aaaaah~



Chapter 881:

Buddhist monks don’t tell lies! Aaaaah~

Translator: GodBrandy  Editor: Kurisu

“…” Fairy Dongfang Six.

“…” Guoguo and Shi in the rear.

The petite figure in Song Shuhang’s embrace was none other than Loli Zhu. At this time, she was holding her throat and squeezing out a cutesy yet very unnatural voice that gave one goosebumps.

But this tactic of acting cute while admitting her mistakes—which she believed would defeat Shuhang—didn’t work as intended. On the contrary, it backfired.

Because at this moment, Song Shuhang only wanted to pick the little girl lying in his embrace up and spank her without mercy.

Loli Zhu curiously raised her head and looked at Song Shuhang, saying, “Eh? Senior Brother Shuhang, why didn’t you react at all?”

From what she remembered, as Fairy Nectarine was admitting her mistakes, she likewise dove into Daoist Priest Pineapple’s embrace just like a swallow returning to its nest.

Afterward, she cutely said ‘Damn you~ I know I’ve made a mistake~ but can you forgive me, pretty please?’ and Daoist Priest Pineapple immediately capitulated, forgiving Fairy Nectarine.

But when she raised her head and looked up, Loli Zhu discovered that Shuhang had a cold expression on his face. His previously kind and gentle expression had become somewhat scary.

“Ah?” Loli Zhu blinked her eyes in puzzlement.

How can this be?

Is it possible that there was something wrong with my tone? Or was the level of my cuteness not high enough?

Thereupon, Loli Zhu took a deep breath and recalled that scene where Fairy Nectarine was acting cute. Then, in her cute yet unnatural voice, she continued, “Damn you~ I don’t agree with this~ I— ah!”

Song Shuhang resolutely picked her up and placed her on his knee.

Then, his big hand struck without mercy.

“Spank, spank, spank~”

And thus, Loli Zhu’s cute yet unnatural voice was interrupted midway.

“Aaaaah! Senior Brother Shuhang, I was wrong, I was wrong! It’s very painful!” Loli Zhu screamed in pain.

Song Shuhang said, “Do you know the mistakes you have made?”

“Sob, sob, sob~ We shouldn’t have secretly run away while you were unconscious!” Loli Zhu said with tears streaming down her face. Senior Brother Shuhang was truly heartless; not even beauty was able to move him.

Next time, she would look for Martial Aunt Fairy Nectarine and bring her over. She really wanted to see if Senior Brother Shuhang could resist Fairy Nectarine’s attack of cuteness as well.

Song Shuhang clenched his teeth, and said, “Is that all?”

“Other than this… other than this… I don’t know!” Loli Zhu raised her head, her expression one of puzzlement.

Which other mistake had the three of them committed aside from running away?

“…” Song Shuhang.

Afterward, he gazed at the distant Guoguo and Loli Shi.

The small monk and Shi slowly arrived in front of Song Shuhang with a pained look on their faces.

“You two know your mistakes?” Song Shuhang said with a serious expression on his face.

The small monk said obediently, “Senior Brother Shuhang, we know our mistakes.”

Song Shuhang gazed at the obedient-looking children, and the anger in his heart decreased a little.

Next, he said in a grave tone, “In that case, if something comes up the next time and I’m not home, will you try to run away again?”

A conflicted expression appeared on the face of the small monk.

After a while…

The small monk joined his palms together and gritted his teeth, saying, “Buddhist monks don’t tell lies! If Senior Brother Shuhang falls unconscious again… there is a chance that I might run away again!”

Their wish to vanquish demons and monsters hadn’t been fulfilled yet. Actually, they hadn’t met a single ghost up until now. Therefore, the small monk was very unwilling to give up!

“…” Song Shuhang got angry. “Disobedient child, get ready to accept your punishment!”

Two delicate hands drilled out of Shuhang’s back and brought the small monk over there, placing him on his other knee.

Afterward, the delicate hands struck without mercy.

“Spank, spank, spank~”

“Aaaaah! Painful, painful, painful! Senior Brother Shuhang, I was wrong, I was wrong!” the small monk called out in pain. Those delicate hands belonged to Ye Si, and their strength while spanking was even higher than Song Shuhang’s hands.

The small monk felt that his butt would definitely become swollen at this pace.

“Will you still try to run away from home the next time?” Song Shuhang asked with a serious expression on his face.

The small monk had tears streaming down his face. After pondering for a moment, he clenched his teeth, and said, “Buddhist… buddhist monks… don’t tell lies. Senior Brother Shuhang, I might still run away.”

The nearby Fairy Dongfang Six was speechless. The small monk was foolish yet adorable.

“Bastard, get ready for the second round of punishment!” The two delicate hands mercilessly struck Guoguo’s butt again.

“Spank, spank, spank~”

Guoguo’s butt had become numb. This time, he felt that his butt might really break.

On his left knee, Loli Zhu gazed at the small monk with a moved expression on her face—force was unable to crush Senior Brother Guoguo’s will! Even while facing Senior Brother Shuhang’s tyranny, he didn’t give in! He was the model she had to follow!

“Senior Brother Guoguo’s will is incredible! Right, we can’t submit to force!” Loli Zhu couldn’t help but cheer for Little Guoguo.

“…” Song Shuhang.

The nearby Shi felt that her junior sister was truly an idiot. “Zhu, you are an idiot!”

“In that case, you’ll also get punished!” Song Shuhang flew into a rage and used the hands of his main body to spank Loli Zhu without mercy!

“Spank, spank, spank!”

“Aaaah! I was wrong. Senior Brother Shuhang, I was wrong! That wasn’t my intention… my intention was to… persuade Senior Brother Guoguo— aaaah~ Senior Brother Shuhang, my butt is about to break!” Loli Zhu also followed in Guoguo’s footsteps.

The nearby Fairy Dongfang Six rubbed her face. She felt that little friend Shuhang really had it hard with these children around.

❄️❄️❄️

In the end, the small monk and Loli Zhu submitted to force.

Although the two children believed to have a powerful will, their flesh was weak. Senior Brother Shuhang hit their butts without mercy, and if he continued like that, they would really shiet all over the place.

At last, under the threat of violence, the small monk and Zhu signed a ‘treaty’ with Song Shuhang. The duo pledged that they would behave while staying at Song Shuhang’s place and won’t run away from home again.

After placing the two disobedient children down, Song Shuhang raised his head and looked at Shi.

“Senior Brother Shuhang, can you hit my palms instead of my butt?” Loli Shi said with tears streaming down her face. She felt that she was already a young lady, and getting spanked in front of so many people was too humiliating.

“…” Song Shuhang.

Why are you making it look as if spanking people is my hobby?

“Do you know your mistakes?” Song Shuhang said with a serious expression on his face. At the same time, he took out a disciplinary ruler from his size-reducing purse.

This was something Senior Palace Master Seven Lives Talisman had given Song Shuhang and the others while they were teaching the natives on that small island abroad.

The main function of this thing was to punish the natives that didn’t study properly.

To make use of it, one simply had to hit hard the palm of the target or hang them upside down from a big tree, beating them up without mercy.

Song Shuhang had to treat the three disobedient children impartially. Since he had already punished Guoguo and Zhu, he couldn’t let Shi off. However, since Shi requested Song Shuhang to hit her palms, he would go along with her and hit her palms.

“Yes, I know my mistakes.” Loli Shi nodded with a serious expression on her face. Then, she nervously stretched out her palms and turned her face to one side, just as though she was a child afraid of receiving a vaccination.

Song Shuhang didn’t show any mercy and hit her palms twenty times each.

After making Loli Shi pledge that she wouldn’t run away from home again and would obediently listening to her elders, Song Shuhang let the three disobedient children off.

He was truly exhausted now~

Song Shuhang felt that his mental age had quickly advanced to that of father-level character within this short period of time he had taken care of the three children.

When would Senior Brother Three Realms come back?

❄️❄️❄️

After dealing with the three disobedient children, Song Shuhang turned his head around and looked toward the tables of the Human-Morphing Feast, searching for Lady Onion.

But even after looking around for a while, he didn’t find her.

Was it possible that she had escaped after hearing his voice?

After all, Lady Onion kept going on about how she wanted to be free. Therefore, it was unlikely that she would give up her freedom now that she had managed to run away from him with much difficulty.

Actually, setting Lady Onion free wasn’t that much of a problem…

However, the enlightenment stone, something very important for Song Shuhang, was still with her, and Song Shuhang couldn’t set her free before retrieving his enlightenment stone.

“Senior Dongfang Six… does the 250th branch of the [All the Monsters of the World Should Unite and Become a Family] organization have a window or back door?” Song Shuhang asked.

“No, it doesn’t.” Fairy Dongfang Six shook her head, and said, “But there is another area beneath the branch… however, I can’t bring you there.”

In the end, Song Shuhang wasn’t a member of the [All the Monsters of the World Should Unite and Become a Family] organization.

“In that case, can Fairy Dongfang Six help me bring Lady Onion here?” Song Shuhang asked.

“I can’t,” Fairy Dongfang Six said with a smile. “Lady Onion is a member of our organization. Unless she is willing, I can’t tell her to come out and go with you. This matter is between you two, and I won’t help any side.”

One was a junior of her organization, while the other was a junior of the Nine Provinces Number One Group. Fairy Dongfang Six could only stay neutral in this kind of situation.

Song Shuhang felt stifled.

❄️❄️❄️

In the 250th branch, inside the underground pyramid.

Lady Onion and that other female monster sat in the guest room, watching the TV.

The news program airing on the TV was an old style one.

Apparently, the leaders of the country were very busy, and if they didn’t go abroad, they would go to the countryside. The people of the country were very blessed, and if they didn’t’ become rich, they still obtained a lot of benefits. Then, every other country was in a very tragic situation, and if the country didn’t get destroyed, the population rebelled.

The usual stuff.

Lady Onion felt somewhat bored, and switched the channel.

The TV program airing on this other channel was about food.

“First, you have to cut the green onion into fine pieces. Remember, the pieces have to be very fine. The finer, the better.” The chubby chief on the TV then moved his knife at high speed.

“Cut, cut, cut~” Very soon, several green onions were cut into fine pieces.

After seeing those green onion sprouts getting cut to pieces, tears streamed down Lady Onion’s face. She felt as if she was experiencing it herself!

It was simply too cruel.

Lady Onion silently switched the channel again.

The nearby female monster really wanted to laugh, but she held back for Lady Onion’s sake.

To avoid laughing, she changed the subject. “Lady Onion, what is the relationship between you and that young human called ‘Shuhang’ outside?”

“Our relationship? How can I explain it…” Lady Onion recalled her first meeting with Song Shuhang.

At that time, she was a cute green onion that had been just released from custody.

When she saw that Song Shuhang, who was just a cultivator of the First Stage, had a valuable treasure like the enlightenment stone, she immediately thought of stealing it to increase her strength. After that, she would master the ultimate technique and go look for Nine Lanterns, taking her revenge.

However, not only was she unable to steal the treasure, she even ended up suffering a loss…

“You can say that I was captured after making a mistake—” Lady Onion suddenly stopped halfway through her sentence.

She felt an evil aura.

A very familiar evil aura…


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