Code Zulu Alpha: Nerd in the Apocalypse!

As a select few from my group were shocked to fuck from the breaking news, the ones who weren’t in the know were confused about two consenting adults getting it on while I, on the other hand, didn’t know whether Lopez had an actual deathwish or he was having a taste of his own medicine.

Besides, I already thought he was into girls half—or even more than half his age, maybe even around the same age as his daughter, Chloe.

But yeah, this could be a step in the right direction for him but unless he was that sex deprived and fucked in the head—no offense to Sal, you don’t simply spend some “quality time” with one of the heads of a drug cartel and expect no blowback.

Granted Sal might’ve been just missing the warmth of a “man” but if their thing blossoms into something more permanent, it’s going to be a whole lot of trouble because not only Lopez had a wife and a daughter back at my alma mater, but he also had responsibilities as a donor to one of my disciples, JP.

And again, no offense to Sal, but in order for her to live a peaceful life with Lopez if ever, they had to “make” his replacements which I doubt she had the ability to do.

Furthermore, I was still torn between tearing his head off with a rusty saw or letting him turn over a new leaf, so let’s just say that I’ll cross the bridge when I get there.

Then as we were pondering about what to do next, we heard a ghastly scream from a few meters above us:

“YOUUU—! YOU DARE BURN THIS OLD, OLD HOUSE?! ARE YOU ALL OUT OF YOUR MINDS?! THIS IS THE— THIS IS— THIS IS A PIECE OF OUR ANCESTRY! IT’S A PIECE OF— GCHK!!!”

I only managed to get a brief glance at this hooded figure when I heard Sebastian’s shotgun fire two rounds at almost the exact same time.

The figure managed to avoid getting its head blown off but Sebastian’s younger blood brothers had already dashed and made their way. I never thought I’d feel such dense killing intent from those three, even more from Sebastian himself, and I might be a little out of base here but the figure they shot must be one of those bitches— I mean, witches in the woods.

lightsΝοvεl ƈοm But yeah, everything just happened too briefly and too quickly but as this “ancestral” cabin was still burning down, the three dragged down the hooded figure and presented it in front of Sebastian.

“Take her cloak off,” Sebastian coldly said as he popped off the spent casings from his gun and loaded fresh ones.

“Right away,” Keith answered as he pulled on the cloak of the figure still screeching and squirming from pain but it was safe to say that if we wanted to eat some lunch, the cloak should’ve stayed on.

Right from the get-go, the rancid smell of BO, piss, shit, and whatever the fuck was rotting and mixing inside her assaulted our noses but I’m 100% sure that maggots were feeding off her rotting arm.

I wasn’t even sure how she was alive and talking right now but I’m sure she didn’t have long because Sebastian blew most of her left shoulder off which seemingly had this very tight tourniquet wrapped around it. Unless this person was planning to cut off her arm any time soon, I doubt putting one there had any purpose to my knowledge.

“Listen… I don’t care who you are or where you came from because the only thing that matters now is if you want to die easily or if you want to die in the worst way your kind knows how to. Trust me, we have plenty of firewood in storage and I’ll even gladly burn you with a magnifying glass if I wanted to… So… are you gonna tell me what I want or do you wanna make me repeat your options?”

“Kugh! Haa… Ha… I’ll curse all of you when I die… your loved ones… your children… everything! If you don’t—”

“Don’t what?! HUH?! TELL ME, YOU FUCKING WITCH! IF I DON’T WHAT?! As all–powerful as you are, you’re pretty fragile from taking in two—no, a shotgun shell to your stinking shoulder! Newsflash, they don’t work… they never do…”

“W-Who the fuck a-are you…?”

As everyone was still trying to process what the fuck was going on, Sebastian started maniacally laughing by himself before he slowly took off the shirt he was wearing.

And let me tell you this: I was more surprised that Sebastian was living and breathing right now compared to him pulling more than 600 pounds of weight. Because as I said before, akin to a person jumping to a woodchipper, it seemed like my metaphor wasn’t as farfetched as I thought.

Not only was Sebastian’s torso riddled with countless scars, as crass or slightly funny as this might sound, but he was missing both his nipples, parts of his skin were patched up by “donated” skin from god knows where, and if I was seeing things clearly, he also had a pair of ribs missing.

Those were the only things I could see from the surface but it might be safe to assume that probably some of his organs were missing or swapped out.

Fuck the “sleeper” build I mentioned last time, Sebastian might get a good laugh out of this but the “Frankenstein” build or the “One foot in the grave” build might just explain his actual physique.

In any case, the “witch” in front of us couldn’t believe her eyes but instead of reacting like a normal person would, her face warped into this unnerving smile that almost ripped her cheeks off—but it ticked off Sebastian even more as he kicked her flat on her back before swinging his axe straight down her ravaged shoulder.

Almost immediately, another blood-curdling scream came out of this stranger and Sebastian just twisted on the handle to separate the limb from the whole body—and it just rolled once to the side before another scream followed.

Doing that would’ve definitely prevented the rot from going further but it’ll only be a matter of seconds before she completely bled out.

But as Sebastian was about to continue his interrogation, the woman gagged and regurgitated this slimy pit viper, then it sank its fangs to the first person it saw, our butler.

“SEBASTIAN!!!”

“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA~!!!”

However, just as the witch threw him a mocking smile, Sebastian just smiled the same way as he pulled the snake off his body and bit its head off and… you know, chewed. Even his three younger brothers stifled a laugh from the bitch’s last hurrah as Sebastian crouched down and looked her in the eye.

“Shame… I thought I’d at least feel something from that so I let it bit me… Shame… Just a shame, to be honest…”

“H-How are— Ha… H-How are you still— Kah! Hahck! KkCK!”

“I thought you’d have what I want but your final gift here? I’ve had way~ worse… Try harder next time…”

And as soon as Sebastian said that, he reached for her messy head of hair that had its own ecosystem before dragging her by the burning house. But to everyone’s surprise, Sebastian simply smashed both her kneecaps before partly placing her body into the fire—starting with her feet.

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH~!!! NO! NOOO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~!!!”

I could only imagine the heat they were both enduring at the same time but I’m 100% sure that burning my body, feet first, was way worse than simply chucking me into the fire. I’d probably die in the first few seconds but it’s completely different if it was done this way.

But yeah, Sebastian just maintained eye contact as the woman screamed for dear life until she was more than well done.

As unnerving as it looked, he used a long branch to slowly push her as she was getting cooked and no one present even tried to stop him from doing so.

Because again, I still have no idea what Sebastian had gone through but if this was his way to get over that, fuck it, not only does he deserve the gratification but the person receiving it fucking deserved it too.

At that point, I’m pretty sure everyone else present added a few more points to how scary Sebastian was but I’m gonna assume Megan and a few others added some points somewhere else. Because yeah, as long as they didn’t have a cabin in the woods and tortured young souls, they should probably be fine.

And as Sebastian made his way back towards us while literally smoking hot, he was smiling at first but once he saw everyone else’s reactions, his smile slowly turned sullen.

‘Dumbasses…’

But yeah, he had his younger brothers with him but I walked over and decided to disturb the waters:

“So… Ever heard of phantom limb syndrome?”

“Yes?”

I nodded as I glanced at his nonexistent nipples, “So… Umm~ Do they still get you know what when it’s cold or nah?”

Sebastian followed my line of sight for a moment before realization struck, “Pfft… HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!”