Chapter 148-Between two extremes

Chapter 148: 148-Between two extremes

"But what would happen if I stopped taking them suddenly?"

The question lingered in the quiet garden. Maisa closed her eyes and released a slow, weary sigh. That was her biggest problem, she didn’t know.

She didn’t know what the medicine was doing to her body. She didn’t know what it had already done to her mates. She didn’t even know whether the person who had been supplying it was trying to save her or slowly destroy her.

For so long, Maisa had believed someone was watching over her. Someone had been giving her what she needed when she didn’t know where else to turn. Someone had been guiding her from the shadows, providing medicine, information, and resources that had helped her become stronger.

She had been grateful. More than that, she had trusted them and now that trust felt like a thin sheet of ice beneath her feet.

What if her benefactor was nothing more than another enemy? What if every helping hand she had accepted had only been leading her deeper into a trap, and the true intentions of the person behind it all had simply not been revealed yet?

Maisa’s fingers tightened around the blood bag in her hand until the plastic crinkled beneath her grip.

"Why am I so easy to deceive?" her voice came out small and bitter.

She walked to a nearby bench and sank onto it. The old wooden seat creaked beneath her weight as she leaned back, exhaustion settling heavily over her shoulders.

For a while, she did nothing and simply stared at the moon. Its pale light spilled through the branches overhead and painted her face in a soft, silvery glow.

The garden was beautiful tonight, peaceful enough to make someone forget that the world beyond it was filled with secrets, danger, and vampires who could hide their intentions behind a smile.

But the moon offered her no answers to her confusions. Maisa lowered her gaze. She thought about everything she had endured to reach this point.

Every time someone had knocked her down, she had forced herself back onto her feet. Every time weakness had reminded her of the title she had been given "unwanted outcast" she had trained harder.

Every time someone had looked down on her, she had silently promised herself that one day she would become someone they could never dismiss so easily ever again.

She had fought harder than everyone else, learnt everything there was to learn and endured so much and yet, somehow, she had still ended up here.

Lost, confused and questioning whether everything she had done had actually brought her forward or merely pushed her in circles.

Her throat tightened. "Every time I get back up..." she whispered. Her fingers curled against her knees. "Every time I train to become stronger and better..." her voice trembled. "Why do I keep getting shoved back to the starting point?"

The garden remained silent. It held no answers for her. For the first time in a long while, Maisa didn’t have the strength to pretend that she knew what she was doing.

She had spent countless hours buried in books at the academy and the mansion. She had read about vampire bloodlines, abilities, weaknesses, customs, history, politics, medicine, and countless other things she thought might help her understand the world she had suddenly been thrown into.

But the more she learned, the more she realized how little she actually knew. There were still too many gaps in her knowledge.

Too many secrets, many things she couldn’t explain and the thought of how much she still didn’t understand made an uncomfortable shiver crawl across her skin.

"When will I finally get the hang of being a vampire?" she murmured.

Maisa tilted her head back and closed her eyes.

If she could choose the kind of vampire she wanted to become, what would she be like?

Varitreya immediately came to mind. There was something about the way the princess carried herself that Maisa admired. She was graceful, composed, and powerful without needing to prove it every second.

But the more Maisa thought about her, the more she realized she didn’t envy her life.

Varitreya’s position came with expectations that wrapped around her like invisible chains. Every decision was scrutinized. Every action had consequences. Her freedom was constantly limited by her responsibilities. The palace watched her closely and didn’t leave her much room to breath and Maisa didn’t want that.

She had spent enough of her life having other people decide what she should be. She didn’t want to exchange one set of chains for another.

Then there was Addessa. There was no denying her power or potential. Addessa possessed the kind of strength Maisa could only dream of reaching.

But strength alone wasn’t enough. Addessa carried the weight of her family on her shoulders. So much of her life seemed dictated by blood, duty, and expectations. Even when she wanted something for herself, there were always responsibilities waiting to pull her back.

Maisa didn’t want that kind of power either. She wanted power that belonged to her. Power she could use without someone else’s permission. One that made her untouchable and not easy to bully or push around.

The last vampire who came to mind was Taratoya. Maisa’s lips pressed into a thin line.

As wicked, dangerous and unpredictable Taratoya was, she was free. Taratoya always seemed to have another card hidden somewhere beneath her sleeve. She possessed an unsettling depth of knowledge, and her power was so vast that Maisa still couldn’t comprehend its true limits.

What frightened Maisa most was how little Taratoya needed to show off. She didn’t need to raise her voice or announce her strength. She simply walked into a room, and somehow, everyone knew they needed to be careful around her.

There was something almost frighteningly effortless about her. One moment, Taratoya could appear vulnerable enough to make people lower their guard around her. The next, she could turn around and become the princess charming who came to the rescue.

She knew how to play both sides: understood when to be soft, when to be fierce and, most importantly, she seemed to know exactly what she was doing.

Maisa wanted that so badly. She didn’t want Taratoya’s cruelty or her wickedness but her freedom and her control over her own life.

Her ability to walk through a room without being completely blind to the dangers surrounding her.

She wanted to know her enemies before they struck. She wanted to understand the hidden games being played around her instead of constantly discovering the rules after she had already lost. She wanted to become someone who couldn’t be easily manipulated.

Someone who always had a card of her own but there was one problem. Maisa had no idea how Taratoya had become that way.

How had she gathered so much knowledge? And how had she learned to survive while keeping everyone around her guessing?

Maisa didn’t even know where to begin. A tired sigh escaped her. "Having too many vampire secrets will also put a target on my back," she muttered.

She looked up at the moon again. Perhaps ignorance was dangerous but knowing too much could be just as deadly.

And somewhere between those two extremes, Maisa needed to find a way to survive because her earlier method failed and following the benefactor was also not wise.

Awooo!

The howl broke Maisa’s daze, her head instantly snapped towards the forests surrounding the hacienda. Her vampire instincts kicked in fully, like a predator detecting another predator on their tuff.

She sniffed the air and caught a surprising scent in the air. Her senses sharpened as every inch in her body reacted alarmingly to that scent. Like the vampire in her was recognizing an enemy.

"Wolf? In the vampire nation?"