Chapter 210: I’m not strong, Rhydor

Azura’s POV

Every single warrior, servant, and guest had already gone to bed, leaving the world still.

Everyone was asleep except for me.

I could not close my eyes. My restless mind was spinning in frantic circles, without a single specific thing to focus on.

And sitting alone in the room was suffocating me, making the air feel too thick to breathe.

So, I decided to walk.

My bare feet moved quietly across the cold wooden floor, leading me out of my bedroom and down the silent hallways.

I pushed open the heavy back door, slipping out into the cool, still night air.

The grass felt damp against my skin as I wandered down the path, needing the chilly breeze to calm the fire burning under my skin.

That was when I saw him.

Rhydor was out there in the empty training yard. He was practicing alone in the dark, his large axes moving through the shadows in smooth, deadly arcs.

The bright moonlight caught the polished metal of his blades, throwing it back into the darkness in blinding silver flashes.

Every single movement he made was perfectly focused, intense, and deliberate.

He was so locked into his training routine that he did not even hear my quiet footsteps approaching the edge of the clearing.

I didn’t call out to him. I walked straight toward him with a strange, sudden weight pressing down on my chest.

When I was finally close enough to feel the wind from his swings, I flung both of my hands outward.

I crossed my wrists tightly in front of my face like a sharp X, and then I violently flung them apart.

The silver bangle resting against my skin instantly responded to my inner thought, transforming in a split second.

My glowing ring blade appeared in my grip, its razor-sharp edges flickering with wild blue flames that cut right through the night.

I rushed toward him with everything I had. There was no warning cry, no sound, and no hesitation.

Rhydor turned around at the very last second, his quick instincts saving him as his heavy axe came up to block.

My flaming ring blade crashed violently against his metal weapon, creating a loud clash that echoed through the silent night.

Sparks flew between our faces, lighting up the raw shock in his dark eyes.

I did not stop to give him time to breathe.

I struck at him again, and then again, and again, pouring every ounce of my frustration into the steel.

Rhydor moved quickly to defend himself, blocking and parrying every single wild swing I threw at him.

He did not try to strike back at me. He refused to attack, using his massive weapons solely to shield his body from my relentless blows.

But my mind was on fire, and I couldn’t control the rage.

Everything I had been keeping locked deep inside my soul was suddenly rushing through my veins all at once.

The deep-seated fear, the silent anger, and the crushing helplessness poured right out of my muscles with every single swing of my weapon.

I wanted to cut through the problems I couldn’t solve.

I kept going, pushing him backward across the grass.

I physically could not force myself to stop.

"Azura," Rhydor said. His voice was calm and steady despite the flames flashing inches from his nose.

I did not listen to him. I ignored his voice entirely.

I swung the ring blade even harder, aiming for his shoulder.

"Azura!" he called out much louder this time, his tone shifting into something urgent.

I swung at him one more time, my teeth bared in frustration.

He moved faster than my eyes could track. With a swift twist of his body, he dropped his heavy axes directly into the grass and lunged.

Instead of stepping in front of me, he stepped right up against my back, wrapping his powerful arms tightly around my torso from behind.

He pinned my arms securely to my sides, trapping my back flush against his broad chest and holding my body still so I couldn’t swing again.

I fought fiercely against his grip from behind, twisting my hips and trying to break free from his iron lock.

The blue flames died down instantly, and the weapon in my hand transformed back into a simple silver bangle.

But I kept fighting him anyway, refusing to give up. I tried to push my elbows back into his ribs, attempting to hit his chest or break his hold with my shoulders.

I was shaking from head to toe, my breath coming out in ragged, uneven gasps while my back heaved heavily against his solid frame.

"It is okay," he murmured right against the back of my neck, his grip remaining tight and unyielding.

"Calm down, Pumpkin."

Suddenly, all the strength drained from my muscles, and I slumped.

My weak knees hit the cold, hard ground with a dull thud. I knelt there in the damp dirt, trembling like a leaf in a winter storm.

Rhydor did not let go of me for a single second; he sank to the grass right behind me, keeping his protective arms wrapped securely around my shaking frame from the back, holding me up so I wouldn’t collapse into the mud.

A loud, broken sob finally ripped out of my throat.

Everything I had been keeping locked deep inside my soul for so many years, the painful memories, the endless pretending, the heavy burden of always acting strong, it all came pouring out of me in an unstoppable flood.

I couldn’t stop the tears even if I wanted to.

"I cannot save her," I cried out into the empty yard, my voice breaking as the image of Amanda’s blue eyes flashed in my mind.

"I cannot do a single thing to help her. And she is stuck in this horrific mess because of me."

Rhydor did not say a single word to interrupt me. He just held me tightly from behind, resting his chin heavily against my shoulder, letting his steady warmth anchor me while I wept.

"All my life, I have forced myself to act so strong," I whispered, my voice cracking under the weight of the confession as I stared blankly at the dark trees.

"I have always acted so brave in front of the pack. I did not shed a single tear when people made fun of my lack of wolf, and I didn’t even let myself feel hurt when they said cruel things to make me feel small."

I shook my head violently, the tears flying from my cheeks into the dirt.

"But deep down inside, I was completely breaking," I admitted, the truth tearing through my throat.

"I was never actually strong, Rhydor. I just desperately needed somewhere safe to stay. I just needed a single place where I felt truly protected from the world."

"And the more I force myself to act strong for everyone else, the more I break apart on the inside."

I felt his grip tighten around my waist from behind, his chest expanding against my back as he took a deep, heavy breath.

"All those times that we were not on good terms... all those awful days I kept acting like none of what you did actually hurt or mattered to me..." I said, my voice shaky and raw.

"It was literally tearing my soul into pieces, Rhydor. But I was too proud. I did not want to look weak in front of you. I did not want to see you looking satisfied with my pain."

Fresh tears streamed down my cold cheeks, blurring the dark clearing in front of me.

"Instead, I tried to kill that weakness inside my heart," I whispered, the words barely audible over the sound of the wind.

"But I wasn’t destroying it at all. By hiding it away, I was actually making it grow so much stronger."

I lowered my gaze, staring down at his large, dark forearms wrapped securely across my stomach.

"And now those monsters have her," I said quietly, the helplessness freezing my blood.

"And I do not even know how to begin to get her back from them."

My voice cracked completely, a heavy gasp escaping my lips.

"Because the truth is, I am terrified to give in," I choked out, breaking down all over again.

"I am so scared to hand myself over to the evil people who are hunting her down. I am terrified of people hurting me again. Rhydor."

I felt him lean his head closer to mine from behind, his breath warm against my ear.

"I will never let you get taken away," he promised softly, his deep voice incredibly low and steady against my skin.

He didn’t hesitate for a single second, his words coming out with absolute certainty from behind me.

"I am never going to let them get their hands on you," he continued, shifting his arms to hold me even closer against his chest.

"You do not need to be scared anymore, Azura. I am always right here to protect you from anything. No matter what kind of enemy comes for us, I will always be here by your side."

He slowly loosened his tight grip just enough to let me move.

Hearing him say those words made me break down completely, the final walls around my heart crumbling into nothing.

With the last of my energy, I turned my body around in his arms to face him, finally holding onto him like he was the only solid thing left in the entire world.

I buried my face deeply into the crook of his neck, weeping like a helpless baby in the middle of the yard.

I did not care how weak I looked at this moment. I didn’t care if an entire army was standing in the shadows watching me break.

I just held onto his broad shoulders and let the years of sorrow pour out of me.

He held me tight, his strong arms wrapping around me like a shield. He leaned down and kissed the very top of my head over and over again, the gentle touch of his lips trying to soothe the shaking out of my limbs.

But even in the warmth of his embrace, a dark, cold realization settled deep in the back of my mind.

Deep down in my soul, I already knew the rules of this war.

Something major had to be given up to the shadows. Someone had to be sacrificed.

To end this war once and for all, something precious must surely be given up.