Chapter 179 - Changing Perception
Kei was scared to make that step forwards, towards the unknown. He was unsure of what might happen if he did continue onwards with this group of people. Will he be able to change? More than that will he be able to survive? Though this world's main trade was war, Kei had no experience in fighting.
He was unsure if he could defend himself, if a problem comes. Based on what he has seen, and the other information he has gathered. All the members of the Mercenary Club except for him, has the ability to defend themselves.
Still if he passes this chance to join this new world, he might regret it later. He knew like everyone else that a war was happening outside the borders, but being a normal citizen Kei never expected to find people related to that world so near him.
He was scared to make a decision, but if he doesn't decide now he might hesitate later and lose the chance to go forward. 'What should I do?'
...
While Kei was having his dilemma, Lyner was also having a little dilemma of his own. He waited for the kids to leave the clubroom, before he sat on his bed.
Lyner sighed as for the first time in a long time, he was having difficulty sleeping. "What the hell did I just do? Why did I tell them that?"
Lyner was caught up in the moment awhile ago, which is why he just said a national secret to some students. Worse case scenario if the information is told to anyone else, and the government finds out that they leaked his identity. Worse case scenario, the kids would be terminated, or in the best case scenario they'll only be placed under surveillance.
Well he wasn't worried too much about that, since all of them were tight lipped, and he was sure they understood the significance of this information.
This event got him thinking. It has been years since he last went to the battlefield, and he was already nearing forty. It doesn't seem like he would be able to find that battle he was craving for.
'Is this the end of my adventurers? Lazing around in school and always sleeping? Those kids are moving forward, while I stayed the same for the past few years. Even though I did take that one kid as my apprentice, but...'
Lyner was now contemplating what he should do next. He wasn't allowed by the country to leave. He wasn't even allowed to go to the battlefield because of his country. Seeing as he was the last line of defense against foreign invaders, he was a deterrent to the other powers.
It was at this point Lyner felt even more constricted.
'Heh... How funny, I used to be the most free of them all. Now I'm the one with the most restrictions... I guess I should have taken Anita's offer and became her husband, at least that would have less restrictions...'
Lyner the strongest merc of Berdonia sat on his bed feeling sorry for himself. He who was feared all throughout the battlefield was now sitting down on a bed, in a school, as some kids club adviser.
'What the hell happened to me?! When did I care about what the government thinks?! Screw the government, if they get in my way then I just annihilate them. I'll do what I want! When I want to!'
Lyner was feeling fired up as he thought about this, but then that fire burnt out.
'Now that I think about it, what is it that I want to do? I can't fight the other SS rank mercs, since that could start another all out war. Even I'm not that stupid to do that... I could finish off old man Tang, but that could prove to be boring... Oh, this time I could propose to Anita, since last time she was the one who proposed marriage it could be fun to see her reaction if I did it... I guess I'll just put that in the back, since that could make most of the Southern Union men hate me... What else could I do...'
Lyner sat there on his bed continuing to think, what other things he could do to amuse himself.
...
While Lyner was thinking about what to do next, Alex was having his own internal problems as well. Sayaka and Lyner had told the others what they truly were. This made Alex feel a bit guilty.
Even though he had no obligation to tell the others he was a merc, also they didn't even asked about it, so why should he go out of his way to tell it. Still it somehow felt like he wronged them.
'Why am I even thinking about this? What merit is there to telling them the truth?... There is none, so then why should I do it?'
Alex couldn't concentrate in class at the moment, which the teacher noticed, but didn't bother to point out. Since based on past experiences pointing it out would only lead to him shaming himself as a teacher.
...
Oliver was also having some thoughts about what happened recently. Not only was he dealing with the idea of his memories being false, but now he finds out that Sayaka was an assassin, and their club adviser Lyner was a SS rank merc.
He had accepted their situation, but it was still hard for him to fully take in the situation.
...
Emily had accepted the situation regarding Lyner quite easily, since Alex had already briefed her about it before. The only thing that surprised her awhile ago was the news that Sayaka was an assassin.
'Still the two of them decided to say who they truly were in front of the others. I wonder if Alex is thinking of doing the same thing?... Hmmm, if he decides to tell, then I guess I'll tell as well. I wonder if he tells, will he also tell about Lilitth? I hope he doesn't, I would hate to see the others treat Lilitth differently after hearing she's an artificial human... Still they did accept Sayaka, so why not Lilitth?... No matter, I'll just wait and see what Alex decides and just follow his lead.'
...
Rachel too had many thoughts about the news she recently heard, which made her question if the others were hiding something as well. Alex and Emily obviously felt like they were hiding something. Kei even though he acts like that, he could also be hiding something. If he could hide something, how about Oliver?
When Rachel got to that point in her thoughts, she stopped. If she keeps on thinking everybody is hiding something, she might actually suffer from paranoia.
'What does it matter? Everyone has secrets that they don't tell, I just need to be patient and maybe just like what Sir Lyner did they might feel like opening up.'