A Regressor’s Tale of Cultivation

Discord:dsc.gg/wetried

Dududududu!

A sound of something crawling roughly echoes.

“Run!!!”

“Doctor! Nurse! What are you doing!? Protect us!!!”

If something like genre exists in reality.

In this moment, the genre of the Wonmi-dong Psychiatric Hospital has flipped 180 degrees.

The anomalous phenomenon S-102, which ordinarily kidnaps people, turns them into mental patients, makes them forget the real world, and locks them away forever, the Wonmi-dong Psychiatric Hospital, at this moment…

…has turned into a guardian that protects the patients while facing countless oddities.

“Nurse!!! Raise the barricade!!! Bring the shotgun!!!”

“Spray the patient-subduing gas!!!”

“The barricade, we have to make the barricade thicker!!! Ah, no!!! The line is collapsing!!!”

If reality also has genres,

In this moment, the genre of ‘Wonmi-dong Psychiatric Hospital’ has changed from a ‘horror story’ to a ‘war story’.

“W-We can’t stop them. T-Those people…”

The oddities that imprison the patients, force drugs into them, and gradually make them forget their memories of reality, the hospital’s nurses.

They tremble and sink to the floor as they look at the ‘navy’ crawling in from beyond the barricade made of chairs, bookshelves, operating tables, and the like.

“I say! We are the honorable British Empire navy! The country is calling you, so answer conscription at once!”

“Even though you have the skill to build such an excellent barricade, do you not know that not volunteering to enlist in the navy is the same as desertion!”

“I say! To be able to build such a spirited barricade, you will make an excellent sailor. Join the honorable navy at once!”

Jjeok, jjeojeojeojeok!

Beyond the barricade, navy men in 19th and 20th century British Empire naval uniforms, with gleaming eyes, gradually smash the barricade as they close in on the nurses.

And finally,

“The, the barricade broooooke!!!”

Kwagwagwang!

“Britain, Britain, chachachacha!!”

“We are the honorable British Empire navy. Answer conscription!”

“Ye who receives the King’s shilling. Serve in the navy!”

“Britain, Britain, chachachacha!!”

As the navy’s cheerful song spreads, the men in British Empire naval uniforms kidnap people without discriminating between patients, nurses, and doctors, beating them at random with clubs and fists, then in an instant change them into British Empire naval uniforms, drop a shilling into a beer mug, and force beer into their mouths to turn them into yet another navy man.

Once again, the British Empire navy begins to multiply.

The multiplying navy begins to run rampant inside the psychiatric hospital like an epidemic.

Not only the patients but even the nurses become terrified by the fear of conscription that the Press Gangs bring, and they shout at the doctors.

“We have to get outside!!!”

“Open the hospital doors right now!”

“At this rate, we will all die!”

The doctors too, as if it is their first time experiencing this, look visibly flustered and stutter as they speak.

“Everyone, calm down! This is only a temporary riot by the patients. Once the subduing gas is sprayed, we can subdue them!”

At the same time, a pale pink gas sprays down onto the navy from the hospital ceiling with a hiss.

Hwiiiiii—

A wind blows in.

The doctors, visibly flustered, look around, and realize that the gas is leaking out into dozens of ‘portraits’ hanging in the corridor.

“What kind of portraits are these…no, wait, they aren’t portraits…?”

Anomalous Phenomenon, [Portrait of an Abandoned House].

People who spend one night in an abandoned house see multiple portraits throughout the night inside the abandoned house, but when they wake up the next day, they realize there are no portraits in the abandoned house and only windows.

What is in the abandoned house is not portraits, but someone who watches the visitors from beyond the windows.

This anomalous phenomenon was suppressed by Kang Min-hee and underwent a slight modification.

The anomalous phenomenon, which originally was only to the extent of someone’s face reflecting in a window, at some point evolved into an anomalous phenomenon that increases the number of windows as much as one wants.

Hwiiiiii—

And, because of the anomalous phenomena that now stare blankly into the corridor while flinging open the glass windows from beyond the increased windows, the subduing gas the doctors release gets blown away in an instant.

And in the very next moment,

The doctor who said, “Once the subduing gas is sprayed, we can subdue them,” gets caught in the hands of the Press Gang that drinks beer and charges again like rabid beasts, is beaten directly, gets changed into a naval uniform, and then gets forced to drink beer.

After a while, the doctor instantly becomes a sturdy navy man and starts singing a cheerful sea shanty.

“What will we do with a drunken sailor?”

“What will we do with a drunken sailor?”

“What will we do with a drunken sailor?”

The other doctors who see that sight become completely terrified and start running away together with the patients.

“I, I’ll open the hospital door, so everyone run!”

“Where, which door are you saying you’ll open?”

“F-First, the back door—”

“Not the back door! The back door is blocked by the [Slit-Mouthed Woman] holding scissors!”

“Then go to the front door!”

The doctors, nurses, and patients run from the British Empire navy men who multiply more and more and chase them like mad.

And just when they finally reach the hospital’s front gate.

“Uh, uhh…uhhhhhh!!!”

One of the patients points at the front gate and cries out.

“Hey! What is that long thing waiting in front of the front gate!?”

Popopopo…

A long woman who seems like she is several meters tall waits for them outside the front gate, making a popopopo sound.

Behind them, the British Empire navy blocks them, and in front of them, the Eight-Chi Ghost blocks them.

The doctors who used to kidnap ordinary people and lock them in the psychiatric hospital now end up like chickens in a coop, trapped in the psychiatric hospital together with the patients.

“Doctors, you sons of bitchessss!!! You said there are no ghosts!!! In your eyes, is that a person!!??”

In the end,

In that extreme situation, the minds of the patients, who are hazy from taking the ‘medicine’ the psychiatric hospital provided, all begin to wake up at once between the Eight-Chi Ghost and the navy men.

The doctors, who push the nurses forward in the situation where they can neither advance nor retreat and try somehow to deal with the Eight-Chi Ghost, suddenly see one patient clutching the [Monkey Paw] and praying desperately.

“M-Monkey’s Paw, please let us escape from this hellish situation…!”

Along with the patient’s wish, the Monkey’s Paw wriggles and creates an ‘other’ exit besides the entrance blocked by the Eight-Chi Ghost.

The doctors and nurses who see that sight go wild-eyed, snatch the Monkey’s Paw away from the patient, run toward the newly formed exit, and make a wish.

“Monkey’s Paw! Make it so we can’t see that horrible navy right in front of our eyes!”

At the doctors’ wish, the Monkey’s Paw wriggles and writes letters in midair.

They are the letters, ‘It is fulfilled’.

At the same time, the navy who chase them instantly become impossible to see right in front of their eyes, and just as the doctors breathe a sigh of relief.

Smack, smack, smack!

From the transparent empty air, someone beats the patients.

Right after, the patient turns transparent as if something is being put onto them, and then a song rings out cheerfully from the empty air.

“Way hay and up she rises~”

“Way hay and up she rises~”

The Monkey’s Paw, hearing the wish, ‘Make it so we can’t see them right in front of our eyes,’ turned the navy into a ‘transparent navy’.

At last, every patient in the psychiatric hospital gets caught by the transparent navy, and all that remains is only the ‘doctor-shaped anomalies’ and the ‘nurse-shaped anomalies’ that used to bring ordinary people into the psychiatric hospital.

And in the end, even after they come out of the psychiatric hospital, they keep running away.

Even as they run, they keep making wishes, pinning their hope on the Monkey’s Paw, but the Monkey’s Paw gradually twists their wishes into distorted wishes and brings dreadful misfortune, reducing the number of doctors and nurses.

And in the end,

All that remains is the anomalous phenomenon that takes the role of the director of Wonmi-dong Psychiatric Hospital.

The anomaly holds the Monkey’s Paw and runs from the transparent navy, and then runs endlessly again.

But the place the anomaly reaches again, after going out through the hospital’s front gate and running endlessly, is…

The hospital’s back gate.

“Ah, ahh…ahhhhh…”

The director anomaly trembles with fear, legs shaking, and then the back gate of the Wonmi-dong Psychiatric Hospital opens, and sturdy sailors with their tops off pour out.

“I say! Welcome to voluntary enlistment. From today, this building will become a ‘naval fortress’ for the British Empire navy. Come this way and undergo the initiation ceremony to enter the navy!”

“U, uaa…aaaaaa…”

And, in the end,

The terrible anomaly that dragged innocent ordinary people into the psychiatric hospital while pretending to be rational and, with drugs and psychological and physical means, made them ‘patients’ inside the hospital.

The terrible anomaly that made them forget the original world.

The last remaining doctor of ‘Wonmi-dong Psychiatric Hospital’.

The director completely lets go of reason and makes a wish to the Monkey’s Paw.

“Please, please save me! O God! Anyone, please!”

And then,

The Monkey Paw’s finger twitches and writes letters in empty air.

‘It is fulfilled.’

Kururung…

The alternate space where the ‘Wonmi-dong Psychiatric Hospital’ exists.

The sky of that space splits, and an existence from a faraway otherworld begins to send [wisdom].

It is the great king of great ghosts.

One of the Underworld’s Judges who sheds blue tears.

A direct disciple of the God of the Underworld.

It is the [wisdom] of a dark, cold, black ghost king.

Piiiii…

The moment that existence’s [wisdom] descends upon this land,

All sound dies.

All matter and beings that have sustained the anomalous phenomenon called the psychiatric hospital cannot endure and collapse.

The director who sustained the psychiatric hospital collapses, and the doctors and nurses collapse with it.

And at the end of everything, the doctor who made the worst wish to the Monkey’s Paw finally accepts its end, driven utterly mad.

Kugugugung!

In the next moment,

At last, the world of anomaly S-102 collapses.

It is the moment ‘Wonmi-dong Psychiatric Hospital’ is dismantled.

“Huuu…”

Kang Min-hee opens her eyes lazily and flicks her fingers, retrieving her pipe.

She is back in reality.

Kang Min-hee sits in the director’s office chair of the abandoned hospital, and in front of her lies something like a small journal filled with writing.

It looks like a log recording the patients’ conditions, and it is a log that reeks of immense obsession.

“Is this your main body, S-102?”

Around S-102, a ‘monkey’s hand’, ‘navy hat’, ‘red mask’, ‘high-heeled shoes’, and a ‘small key’ lie scattered.

Each of them is the main body of an anomaly such as the Monkey’s Paw, Press Man, Slit-Mouthed Woman, Eight-Chi Ghost, and ‘Portrait of an Abandoned House’.

Kang Min-hee puts the key, the shoes and the mask into her sleeve, then stares at the ‘navy hat’ and the ‘monkey’s hand’ for a moment, and carefully tucks those into her chest as well.

Portrait of an Abandoned House, Eight-Chi Ghost, and Slit-Mouthed Woman are usable, but they are not that strong as anomalous phenomena, so she can handle them comfortably,

But both Press Man and Monkey’s Paw are anomalies that received an alphabet grade somewhere between SS and J.

On top of that, they are powerful while lacking any particular reasoning capability, purely acting on instinct, so if Kang Min-hee did not suppress them herself, they could have destroyed Earth several times over, or replaced everything on Earth with the British Empire navy. Oddities that can end the world.

That is the Monkey’s Paw and the Press Man.

“How did even these hideous things end up falling to Earth…?”

She especially stares hard at Monkey’s Paw.

The Monkey’s Paw is an object that makes the one who makes a wish meet ‘the worst ending’.

However, when it is beside a divinity like Kang Min-hee, the Monkey’s Paw regards her as ‘the most ominous thing,’ and it guides any being who makes a wish toward ‘the worst ending’ they could possibly face, leading them to learn something about Kang Min-hee’s main body.

It is convenient for Kang Min-hee to use, but at the same time, if the user is not an existence like Kang Min-hee, it is a dreadful monstrosity that can destroy not only Earth but even the solar system.

“For an object that is usable even by Mount Sumeru standards, at the level of an Immortal Treasure, to fall to Earth… Just what kind of world is your original world?”

Kang Min-hee asks the Monkey’s Paw, but the Monkey’s Paw does not particularly answer.

Kang Min-hee shrugs, and after tightly isolating the Monkey’s Paw as well, she puts it into her bosom.

“Now then…it’s time to decide how to deal with you.”

She fidgets with the notebook that is the true body of the Wonmi-dong Psychiatric Hospital, a notebook with records of the patients’ actions, and thinks.

“You’re pretty heavy, so at the level of my split body I can’t send you back to your original world. I have to draw on the power of my main body, but because of a promise with friends I can’t carelessly draw on my main body’s power. The afterimage of my main body you just saw doesn’t violate the restriction because the Monkey’s Paw dragged it in, so that’s fine, but… Anyway, for that reason, it’s hard to send you back to your world right away. And if I just lock you up in a containment facility, you’ll definitely be unable to stand that anomaly instinct of yours and you’ll make a mess again. Right?”

The note gives no answer.

Kang Min-hee brings the flame of her pipe down to the lower part of the note, and only then does the note flinch and begin to tremble as if it is alive.

“Is it better if I just erase you here, or is it better if you work in the ward of our Anomalous Phenomenon Management Bureau, let off some strength appropriately, live while helping us, and support each other in mutual give-and-take?”

At Kang Min-hee’s question, the notebook struggles with all its might to avoid the pipe smoke and opens.

Pararak—

On the page where the note opens, a single sentence is written.

[I will help.]

“Good. I like it. When you recover your strength, let’s stay at the Anomalous Phenomenon Management Bureau and live while carrying out proper treatment work.”

Pallak—

[Yes, thank you for sparing me.]

“Good. Then there are still missing people inside your inner alternate space, right? Since it’s absorbed my wisdom, that alternate space and the missing people won’t be in any kind of normal condition…You just have to return the missing people to the Bureau coordinates I tell you. Now, first…”

Like that, Kang Min-hee resolves this anomalous phenomenon by obtaining a new anomaly and rescuing all the missing people.

“Brr, it’s cold. Tonight, with french fries…I should drink beer.”

Kang Min-hee tucks the notebook into her bosom and leaves the abandoned hospital.