6 Times a Day

Not surprisingly Alan was delighted beyond belief at this lucky turn of events from his point of view. But he was determined not to let his lust get the best of him. He wanted to be gentlemanly and do the right thing.

So he tried his best to placate her. “Hey, it’s cool. I can, uh… I can help find the button?” He looked around but didn’t see it anywhere. Chances were it had fallen to the floor below the table, but it was hard to see down there, especially since the pub wasn’t that well lit.

She sighed heavily. “No, that’s okay. What good would that do?” She asked sarcastically, “Do you have a sewing kit on you and know how to sew?”

He couldn’t resist joking, “No, but I’ll tell you what. Take that dress off right now and I’ll take it home and my mom can sew a new button on. Then I can give it back to you in a few days.”

She shot him an amused yet chagrined look. She used to be annoyed by his undisguised lust for her body and her bust in particular, but now she actually enjoyed it. He had a way of making it fun, like this joke, instead of creepy. “Gee, thanks. And I suppose I should just go without any clothes for a few days until you can return this particular dress?”

He deadpanned, “Yes, that would be best. I’m not sure, uh… I can’t really think of a good reason why you can’t wear some other dress until then, but believe me, there are very good reasons!”

She laughed and shook her head. “You’re too much. But still, I really blew it.” She was still covering up, but she knew she couldn’t do that all evening.

He thought, Hold your horses! Stay calm! Keep “Bad Alan” In check! He tried to sound calm as he asked, “Why do you keep saying that?”

“The thing is, I don’t really go out much. Pretty much ever, in fact, except for our recent practice dates. And even though this isn’t really a practice date, I still wanted to wear something fun, you know? Something I wouldn’t normally wear. But all my clothes are lame! Really lame. So I borrowed this from my Aunt Kirsten, like I told you before. Only she’s not quite as… endowed as I am.”

He couldn’t resist asking, “You mean, in the chesty area?”

“Yes.” Christine’s embarrassment grew. “So I thought, ‘Close enough for horseshoes.’ After all, I wore her outfits on our last couple of practice dates and that worked out fine. But then THIS happens!”

He wanted to put her at ease, and he figured the best way to do that was with humor. He leaned forward, acting extra earnest and serious. “Don’t be upset. Thanks to this little accident of yours, I’ve had a profound spiritual moment. No, make that a life-changing religious epiphany!” 𝐞𝗼𝘃𝐞𝐥．𝗰𝐨𝗺

She narrowed her eyes. “Oh, what? And why do I get the feeling that another joke is coming on?”

“I realized not one but two things. First, there IS a god. And second, he really, really likes me!”

She laughed, despite herself. How can I stay upset? He’s just so much fun! So what if I lost a button? I was showing a lot already, and it’s not much more than what I showed at our last practice date, or the bathing suit I wore at the beach. I sure wish I’d worn a bra, though! He’s totally gonna notice that now. I’ll just have to bite the bullet.

He quickly glanced at her even greater cleavage display. Then he sang, “Aaaah, aaaah, aaaah, ahhhh…” He improvised a tune that was supposed to sound like a medieval Gregorian chant, showing religious rapture. At the same time, he held his hands up and stared at the ceiling, as if a beam of light from a choir of angels was shining down on him.

She couldn’t help but chuckle some more. “Stop it! What’s it with you and cleavage, anyway? They’re just boobs.”

He stopped his religious act, but pretended to be aghast. “JUST boobs? That’s like saying Alexander the Great was just a guy who wore a funny helmet. Or Einstein was just a guy with a bad haircut. Just boobs?! Why, haven’t you heard the saying ‘boobliness is next to godliness?'”

She laughed still more. “No, I haven’t.”

All his joking had put her at ease, even though most of it was sexual in nature.

The unmentioned elephant in the room was that both of them were incredibly aroused. They both knew how much he longed to see her breasts unbared, and here was a very real chance. Neither could fully admit the possibility, not even to themselves, but it hung in the air and made their hearts race just the same.

She realized, If it were anyone else, I’d be out of here! But with him, I actually kind of like when he stares at me. With him, he doesn’t just see me as a piece of meat. Sure, there’s lust in his eyes, big time, and that’s actually flattering when it comes to him. But still, he never stops being a friend, someone who respects me.

She sighed. “I suppose we should just move on and get started with the math. I sure hope no one else is going to see me like this though.” She looked to the side, scanning what she could see of the rest of the pub.

She held that pose for a surprisingly long time.

Finally, it dawned on Alan, Damn! Double damn! She’s doing that to let me check her out! That’s making me even MORE horny. It’s totally cleavage-o-rama!

He was amazed at just how far down her neckline plunged, even if it had not been for her button accident. But thanks to that, he figured that she couldn’t be wearing a bra, since it probably would have been visible in the gap between her huge globes.

God, I’m so fucking horny now. Christine? Not wearing a bra?! I swear, there IS a god! How will I be able to think about boring old calculus? The funny thing is, I get more aroused just looking at her tits like this than actually fucking even Mom’s or Aunt Suzy’s fully exposed tits! Well, just about. Except when they stick out their tongues and start licking the tip of my dick while they keep on sliding their… Oh man, what am I doing? I can’t think about that now! I’m way too horny already!

Meanwhile, Christine was so thrilled yet frightened that she practically felt like she would pass out from the moment. She found this strange, because her martial arts training had taught her how to control her body and her emotions. But in a sexual situation like this, it seemed all that training was utterly useless.

She knew exactly what she was showing, on purpose. She could see just out of the corner of her eye how he was gawking in awe, and that aroused her even more. She was tempted to lunge across the table to kiss him hard on the lips, and maybe even more. It took all her willpower to focus on her breathing to prevent her huge tits from heaving on her chest in a blatantly obvious manner.

He gathered his wits and said, “Christine, I must say, you look stunning! Not even counting your little button incident, you’re just absolutely stunning! And I don’t just mean your regular, everyday ‘Christine is awesomely beautiful’ kind of stunning; I mean even more stunning than that!”

She turned back and looked at him. Realizing that he was being sincere, she looked away again in embarrassment. “Alan, really. You’re just saying that!” She blushed, but at the same time she loved the compliment so much that she was practically glowing.

“No, I’m not. In fact, I’m kind of amazed this place is relatively normal.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, I would expect some kind of reverse Medusa affect, with all the guys and most of the girls just STUNNED by your beauty.” His eyes bugged out in imitation of the stunned effect he was trying to explain. “You know, everybody just frozen with their mouths gaping open upon seeing you.”

She admitted, “Well, nobody’s really seen me yet, except for you. And I’d kind of like to keep it that way. That’s why I picked this booth, way in back.” She looked down and frowned at all the cleavage she was showing. “And thank God I did, too!”

He thought with growing excitement, Man oh man! This is just for me! Dude! She’s giving me all kinds of signals. Being eager to meet, wanting to turn the meeting into a quasi-practice date, dressing like THAT, the hug, the kiss, the sexy pose… Jesus H. Christ! She really wants me!

But he tried not to show his arousal. “That’s cool. Your secret’s safe with me. I just wish this could be a real practice date, instead of some kind of math lesson.”

She grinned at that. “Well… make it up to me when you get back from your trip, okay? Why don’t we have a real date early next week?” She realized what she’d said, and blushed a little. “A real practice date, I mean.”

“Sure. Let’s plan on it.”

He thought, MAN! Even the way she gets all embarrassed about saying “real date” totally shows that she wants to really date me. Dang! If she only knew the kind of depraved, non-stop, incestuous sexual life I live, she’d kill me!

That thought cooled his ardor somewhat. Desipte his boner threatening to rip through his pants, he managed to bring up the math again. “Let’s see how fast we can get this calculus crap out of the way, and then we can enjoy that ice cream sundae.”

“Good idea.”

She thought, Whoa, Nelly! I’m sending out all the wrong signals. It’s just that my competitive nature gets the best of me. If he’s gonna lust after anybody, he should be lusting after me! The rumor is that he’s involved with Heather. Am I supposed to just sit by and let THAT BITCH have him?! No way! What’s wrong with having another practice date? They are just for practice, after all. Okay, I’ve made my point, whatever it was exactly; now it’s time to focus!

Just like that, she was all business. Her expression turned serious as she brought out her math book and papers and put them on the table. “To be honest, I don’t think it’ll take long. The nice thing about math is that you can have these Eureka moments where it suddenly all makes sense. Now, tell me what you need explained.”

He brought out his material and placed it on his side of the table. He forced himself to stare at his material instead of at her deep cleavage or her breath-taking face. “I guess the problem for me is figuring out how to use integration to solve problems. Here’s one: ‘If a used car has a 10% probability of needing major repairs within the first year, and that doubles for every succeeding year, what is the expected probability that it will need major repairs within the first 30 months?’ I understand how to do averages, but the percentage increase isn’t a straight line; otherwise it would be 30 percent. I know it must be a little bit less than that, because most of the third year increase has to occur near the end of the third year, because it increases so much more the fourth year. But I don’t know how to figure out what it is.”

He waited for her reply, but when she didn’t respond he looked up at her. He found her staring at him with a curious smile on her face. “What is it?”

“Oh, nothing. But I should mention that you’re looking pretty yummy right now. I love the sweater.”

“Uh, thanks.”

He thought, “Yummy?” Did Christine the friggin’ Ice Queen just call me “yummy?” Schwing! Instant boner, and just when it was getting flaccid too. I swear, it’s like some kind of conspiracy. She’s dressed like that and acting all flirty so I’ll never figure this math stuff out. Ugh!

She similarly thought, “Yummy?!” Am I mentally retarded?! I can’t believe I said that. Just because he does look yummy doesn’t mean I should say it out loud! IDIOT! Ugh. I’m such a total idiot! Those damn stupid hormones are getting to me again. Showing off so much of my chest. Dumb! I feel naked and completely exposed, like I’m not wearing any clothes at all. But instead of that making me feel scared and withdrawn, it’s making me, well… tingle in weird places! Screw that. We’re not going out, and we’re not gonna go out. Period! So no more mixed signals!

After that, thanks to her renewed resolve, they really did buckle down. She started explaining how to use integrals, and she did it much better than their teacher ever had. He actually able to concentrate and understand, even with her dramatically exposed cleavage as a near-constant distraction.

The only arousing thing to happen was that after a while Christine suggested that he sit on her side of the booth, so he could read her worksheets right-side up as she showed him how to work out the problems. Thanks to sitting in a booth instead of individual seats, he soon found himself hip to hip with Christine. Things got very cozy with a lot of side-to-side contact as they remained bent over and focused on the same piece of paper.

In a matter of minutes, Alan had his Eureka moment about using integrals. However, he still had a number of other concepts he didn’t understand, so he went to get their drinks. In this particular pub one had to chase down the employees to get any food or drink, even when they weren’t busy.