6 Times a Day

In class later that morning, Alan found to his surprise that he could temporarily put the recent crazy sexual incidents out of his mind and focus somewhat on his classes. ．𝚌ｏ𝚖

It helped that he had other things on his mind. For instance, he spent a considerable amount of time thinking about his date with Christine the previous Friday, even though it was supposedly just a meaningless practice date.

The fact that Christine was in some of his classes helped ensure that he couldn’t forget about her. Since they both were in the “gifted” or advanced track, they were in most of the same classes. And since they were both “teacher’s pet” types, they tended to sit in or near the front row. Due to Alan’s long-standing crush on Christine, he’d managed to sit next to her in those classes that they shared.

Because they were friends and had similar schedules, they sometimes walked from class to class together. For instance, they had the same first and second-period classes, so on many days they would chat while they moved to their next classroom in the five minute gap between those classes. In fact, since Alan had almost never seen Christine socially outside of school, these times between classes, as well as sometimes eating together for lunch, were the basis for much of their friendship.

That day was no different, so when their first-period physics class ended, they naturally fell in together as they walked to their next class. But it was different in one important way, because they’d had their first practice date after their previous day together at school.

“Hey,” Alan said, trying to sound casual.

“Hey,” Christine replied.

“So… what’s up? Did you do anything fun Friday evening?”

She laughed, since she’d spent most of the evening with him. She joked back, “Eh. It was okay. You know, the same ol’, same ol’.”

He was hurt at first, until he realized she was just kidding him. He played along with that too, yawning ostentatiously. “Yep. Same ol’, same ol’.”

There was an awkward silence after that. Neither of them really wanted to talk about their date. Although Alan would have loved to date Christine, after her initial rejection they had agreed to be just friends. He was trying hard to roll with that and not think of her in a way that was too sexual or romantic.

Christine, by contrast, was discovering that her romantic feelings for Alan had been growing steadily ever since he’d asked her out and she’d turned him down. She’d always liked him a lot, and lately he’d developed a new confidence and even a sexual swagger that made him much more desirable as something more than just a friend. She was particularly impressed by his behavior on their practice date. The truth was, she couldn’t have imagined a better real first date. But she was trying hard to still think of him as just a friend, so she was as determined as he was to make it seem like the practice date was no big deal.

As a result, she decided to change the topic, even though they had been referring to their practice date in only a very oblique manner. “So… got a lot of homework?”

“Enh. Not so bad. I’ve got a big test coming up in my history class, but that’s about it.”

“Oh, yeah. Ms. Rhymer’s World History class. How’s that coming along? We blondes are curious how the common folk live.”

Alan grinned, but he also shook his head. Christine was so smart that she’d even managed to skip ahead of him in some subjects, in order to get college credits while still in high school. That was why their class schedules weren’t even more similar. She’d had Ms. Rhymer’s class the previous year and was taking an Advanced Placement history class this year. It just so happened that there was a greater percentage of blondes than usual in that class, and she never let Alan forget it. Since he liked to tease her with “dumb blonde” jokes, one way she joked back was to claim he was taking the “remedial” history class for “brunettes.”

Knowing all that, he playfully teased, “Yeah, well, it’s fascinating. We’ve been learning that it turns out history is made almost entirely by brown- or black-haired people, and even a few redheads. Pretty much everyone but blondes. Think about how many U.S. presidents were blonde, for instance. There’s James Garfield, and… and… oh yeah. That’s about it!”

She was all grins, because she loved this kind of bantering with him. “I’ll have you know that U.S. presidents are just puppets. The REAL power lies with secret societies. All-BLONDE secret societies!”

“Yeah, right. Then how do you explain that Ms. Rhymer herself is blonde, and she’s the one teaching us about all the famous non-blondes?”

Christine shook her head dismissively. “How na?ve you are. Of course we blondes have to keep the dark-haired masses from the truth, so naturally Ms. Rhymer plays a role in that part of the plot. This whole ‘dumb-blonde joke’ thing you love is just another part of the smokescreen, and you’re unwittingly helping us by spreading those jokes.”

“Oh yeah? If that’s true, then why are you telling me all this?”

She was just making up stuff as she went along, and that stumped her. But after only a brief moment she came up with an answer. “The truth is, blonde power is growing, Our fearless leader, Reese Witherspoon, thinks it’s time we start to step out of the shadows and reveal our real role to the teeming masses.”

He laughed. “Reese Witherspoon? Is she the supreme leader of the planet or something? And I suppose her role in last year’s movie ‘Legally Blonde’ is somehow tied up in this grand unveiling?”

“Hey, pretty smart guesswork, for a brunette.”

They continued to joke around like this until they were seated in their second-period English class and the bell rang.

When the teacher, Mr. Randall, started lecturing, Alan thought, Dang. She got me good this time around. But I’ll get her next time. The interesting thing is how she deflected the conversation from our practice date, talking about all this hair color silliness until class started. She obviously wants to make it clear that that was no big deal. I was kind of getting my hopes up that she’d reconsider things, but I guess not. She probably doesn’t even want to go on a second date. Damn!

Besides, how could we even get romantic now, what with all my sexual stuff going on lately with Mom and Sis and Aunt Suzy and whatnot? It’s better just to play it cool with her.

At the same time, Christine thought, Talking to Alan is such fun! We have such a good rapport. I couldn’t joke around like that with anyone else. Everyone else is intimidated by me; with him we’re just pals on an equal footing. And Friday night was even more fun! If I wanted a real boyfriend, it would definitely be him. But, sadly, that boat has sailed already and I missed my chance. It’s best to treat our date like the non-event it was supposed to be. Besides, I wouldn’t even know what to say to him about it. “Hey Alan, I had a lovely time Friday evening”? No, that’s too cheesy! And he might get the wrong idea. Even though maybe that wouldn’t be such a bad thing…

No. What am I thinking? Gaawwwd, I’m terrible at this kind of thing! It’s best to stay friends in any case, because otherwise I’d probably just screw it all up. Things would get weird and awkward and we’d lose this special rapport we share.