Chapter 349: Price For Your Life

After Karon returned to his cabin, he lay back down and resumed resting. The token-binding ceremony would be held late at night, which meant that he would need to wake even earlier than he had originally planned to be able to enter Reincarnation Valley. For that reason, he needed to adjust his state even further in advance.

Vintral stayed within Karon’s room, but did not dare speak up and argue with his captain again. It was not that he was afraid of being kicked again, but that he was afraid of disturbing Karon’s rest.

The turmoil and emotion in his heart caused Vintral to curl up in the corner and weep silently. Again and again he wiped his tears away with the back of his hand.

When it was time for dinner, Vintral took a deep breath, got to his feet, and went out to fetch dinner for the captain. In the dining hall, he ran into Ashley, Blanche, and the others.

Before they could take the initiative to ask why Vintral’s eyes were so red, he voluntarily told them that the captain was going to replace him.

For that reason, when Karon was awakened to eat his dinner, his rather small room was fully packed with all of his squad members.

The cabin window was fixed shut and could not be opened, and there was also no exhaust fan inside. The room was stuffy to begin with, and with so many people crammed in, each and every one wearing solemn expressions, both the air and the atmosphere became suffocating.

Karon reached up and rubbed his brow, irritably remarking, “Sleep requires enough fresh air. Only then can the quality of sleep be good.”

“Captain...” Ashley pursed her lips and then continued, “We all know.”

“If you know, then you know. It is not anything special.” Karon picked up the tray with his dinner. He hesitated for a moment, but still stood up. “Come on, I’ll eat on the deck.”

At any other time aboard a ship, eating on deck would definitely not be pleasant. The swaying hull and the waves that might splash over at any moment could easily add extra seasonings to your dinner.

However, there was not much sea breeze in this stretch of water, and the ship was moving very steadily. After arriving on deck, Karon was even able to place his tray right on the railing without fear that it would shake and fall.

Dinner did not have many different dishes, but the portion was very large: three fried chicken legs, a large serving of curry rice, and six pieces of pan-fried fish fillets.

The others also held their trays and stood nearby. Bart said, “Captain, let me do it instead.”

Karon picked up a chicken leg with his left hand and took a bite. Glancing at Bart, he said, “I don’t want to go through this pointless nonsense again.”

“It is not nonsense, Captain. What I mean is—”

“Enough. There’s no need to keep discussing something that’s already been decided. We’re not sitting in a theater watching a romance film, where one simple plot point has to be repeated multiple times. Save a bit of time. Also, it annoys me.”

Everyone fell silent and began lowering their heads to eat.

The first to finish eating was Vintral. This boy, who always had the largest appetite in the entire squad, had no appetite tonight. He broke the silence and said, “Captain, you have a way to deal with this, right?”

Ashley echoed him, “Captain, you have a way to keep yourself safe, right?”

Karon did not answer. He continued biting the chicken leg while staring at the thick fog ahead.

Ever since he had received the mission from Groven’s room, he had been thinking about one question. It was a very simple question, yet also extremely complicated: how had this extra task suddenly been added right when they were about to reach Reincarnation Valley?

Taking the tokens into the Reincarnation Gate to receive Getanbert and Fynethes was a task they had known about from the start. When Barrett had assigned their tasks, he had said that there were a total of three, and had arranged them from least to most important.

Karon and Murray had held a brief, private meeting, and had completely reversed the priority of the tasks Barrett had assigned, making them go from most to least important.

The higher-ups’ backup plan had been waiting here. They had chosen one person from each squad and would have them bind the token. To Getanbert and Fynethes, these two squads would be like people waving flashlights about in the dark. If the two still existed, they would definitely be able to sense the people carrying the tokens.

Then, through the array already bound to the token, whoever bound the token would lose their ability to resist, becoming the best vessel for the other party to take over.

So, the higher-ups had never cared how the squads intended to arrange the priority of their tasks, because things had already been arranged for them.

What Karon was thinking about was not actually this, but how the higher-ups had dared to make such arrangements and then present things so openly.

Just as Karon had said earlier to Groven, this was not fair!

Karon’s logic dictated that sacrifice required reasoning. Just like standing on a levee and fighting desperately to block it, preventing the embankment from collapsing. One would do that because they clearly knew that someone had to protect the residents below the levee. Only by understanding the meaning of one’s sacrifice could they make that sacrifice.

But what right did they have to sacrifice living people to retrieve two souls whose survival was unknown, and even the condition in which they might exist was unknown?

This sort of practice, which completely lacked any basis and any self-convincing logic, that treated people purely as silver pots, how could the higher-ups be so certain that these chosen young people would agree and not refuse?

However, the facts proved that they had indeed not refused.

Whether it was Vintral, Ashley, Bart, or the others, all along, not one of them had expressed any anger or doubt in regards to what the higher-ups had arranged. They had instead tried to persuade him and show their care for him on the premise that the matter was already settled, and they merely wanted to replace the person who was being sacrificed.

In their understanding, this matter was only natural.

It was the same with Murray. He had gone home yesterday for a family meal. Looking back, he must already have known about his “arrangement” at that time, which was why his mood had been somewhat low throughout the day. Yet he had merely been a bit down. The young man who had fought Karon for so long in the coconut grove the other night had completely bowed his head and accepted this arrangement when confronted with it.

Only now did Karon realize that his previous understanding of the church had still been one-sided. It was not a nation, although its internal structure greatly resembled one. It was not an organization, although its mode of operation greatly resembled that of an organization or gang. It was even less of an interest camp, a fellowship, or a research society made up of like-minded people.

It was a religion. It was a church.

The first priest of Order Karon had known deeply was his grandpa: Tiz.

The second had been Mr. Pavaro.

The third was his own captain.

Tiz had long since become a rebel of the church. If not for the fact that he had condensed three godhead shards, his rebellion would likely have been recorded in the church’s history.

As for Mr. Pavaro, he had belonged to the department of the church that oversaw “human ethics.” In Karon’s eyes, the man had been more like a local police chief than a believer.

As for Nio, he was seeming more and more like someone who lived just to watch the fun.

In truth, Karon’s vision had remained too narrow. He had mistakenly believed that what he had seen was the whole.

However, the truth was that he had not.

If the captain had not blindly obeyed back then, hoping to be with Elisa through church-recognized means, she would not have failed to wait for the real Dormancy Serum and been forced to commit suicide while falling into derangement.

If Tiz had been able to cut his family away from the church the way he had eventually, “Karon’s” parents would not have suffered their fate either.

Even Mr. Pavaro, who had continued rejecting outside resources despite listening late at night to the painful sobs of his two daughters, had he been supported by his character or by his loyalty to his god?

Each praise of the God of Order was actually an oath, sworn again and again. When god needed you, when the church needed you, you offered up everything you had without reason.

There was not even any need for a passable reason, because god was the only reason.

Murray’s grandfather knew his grandson had been chosen, but had merely called him home for a farewell meal, then let him go.

So, was Karon’s maternal grandfather, Derron, the same sort of old man? Was that why his grandmother, Ms. Tansley, would not tell Derron of Karon’s existence?

If the Church one day needed Eisen or Richard to make the same sacrifice, Derron would also not ask why. Perhaps, it would all amount to nothing more than a farewell meal, followed by sending his son or grandson out the door to offer everything to the great God of Order.

A sudden fear crept into Karon’s heart. Thinking back now, the way he had felt so relaxed while in the Gormans’ home, that subconscious assumption that it was the home of family, had practically been an offense against Karon’s own life.

The Gorman family was not the Immers family. His maternal grandfather, Derron, was even less comparable to Tiz. It was not a difference of strength.

Karon held the chicken leg in his hand, his eyes sweeping over the young people standing around him. For a moment, he found them so unfamiliar, and he himself felt so alone.

No, he felt so out of place.

The Church of Light preached Light to the world, while the Church of Order preached Order to the world...

He had only seen Light. He had only seen Order. He had only seen faith. He had forgotten that above those things stood god.

How could there be god above faith?

Karon set his spoon into his curry rice. At this moment, he very much wanted to reach for a notebook and grab a fountain pen so that he could write his thoughts down, but he was on the deck of a ship, not in his study behind his funeral home.

***

“There has never been any savior, nor any god, or immortal emperor...”

In the study in the back courtyard of the funeral home, Alfred was sitting behind the young master’s desk, humming his favorite hymn as he organized his Sayings of the Young Master, also known as the Sayings of Karon.

Although Alfred had long since memorized the contents so thoroughly he could recite them backward, the black notebook was still spread open before him. To Alfred, it brought him an indispensable sense of ceremony.

Because everything he recorded and organized originated from the young master’s records in this black notebook.

All of a sudden, Alfred froze, because he noticed there was a scribbling sound coming from the black notebook, as though someone were writing in it. The problem was that the fountain pen was lying beside it and not moving at all!

Alfred immediately reached out and flipped through the black notebook. When he reached the latest page, he happened to see a passage of golden text appearing on that page:

I made a mistake, an error in the process of cognition.

Alfred’s eyes widened, and his hands began to tremble with excitement.

The writing continued to appear:

I only saw the church’s advanced aspects in certain areas, such as armaments, teleportation arrays, Church Affairs Buildings, Knight Regiments, tobacco, alcohol...

But no matter how advanced it is in those many respects, that still cannot conceal its essence: it is backward, ignorant, and idealistic.

The correct understanding should be to affirm the Church’s positive side while also criticizing its negative side.

Alfred licked his lips and read these words with great seriousness. When the final sentence appeared, Alfred’s mouth opened wide in shock.

At faith’s end, there should be no god.

***

“Captain?”

“Captain?”

Everyone saw Karon standing there without speaking or moving for a long time.

He slowly opened his eyes, a smile touching the corners of his mouth. He picked up one of the two remaining large chicken legs on his plate and held it out to Vintral. Vintral froze for a moment, but then opened his mouth and took a bite.

Karon then grabbed the other chicken leg and moved it towards Ashley. She immediately opened her mouth wide, but he bypassed her and held the leg out to Bart instead. Bart opened his mouth and bit into it.

“Did you bring tissues?” Karon asked Ashley.

“No.”

“Captain, I have a handkerchief.” Blanche immediately handed over a handkerchief.

Karon wiped his hands and then returned it to Blanche. “Sorry, I dirtied it.”

“It’s fine, Captain.”

He looked around at his squad members again and addressed them all, “All right, even if I bind with the token and become a vessel, that doesn’t mean certain death. It only means that my chances of preserving myself are lowered. However, I have a way to deal with it. I am different from all of you. Your souls are too weak, while my soul is too strong. What is very dangerous for all of you is not much of a problem for me.

“So, put away your low spirits. This is just a trivial little incident. Nothing will happen to me. Believe me, I am still looking forward to coming back out of the Reincarnation Gate and taking you all with me to create my own Whip squad. I still want to earn many, many credits and purchase many, many armaments.”

Karon clapped his hands. “All of you, cheer up! I have no interest in combing through your emotions like stroking chicks, so I don’t want to have to say this a second time. Do you hear me?”

“We hear you, Captain!”

***

In the corridor with the cabin doors, Pasquio and Degart held their cigarettes between their fingers, their expressions heavy. They happened to see the members of Karon’s squad returning from the deck, each one looking full of spirit.

Pasquio turned back and looked behind him, into the room where his own captain, Murray, and the others were sitting in an utter slump. “What? Did we not receive the same notice?”

Degart said, “The other squad’s captain snatched his squad member’s slot.”

“He had to snatch this too?” Pasquio laughed. “What an unreasonable captain!”

Degart asked quietly, “Should we go and symbolically try to take it from our captain?”

Pasquio shook his head. “No.”

“True, there is no point. The captain would never agree anyway.”

Pasquio blinked and said, “I’m afraid of what would happen if he did.”

***

Late that night, in the ship’s cabin, a group of Order priests finished their preparations. Ten young people stood behind them, while the two captains sat in front.

Groven walked forward. The assistant beside him indicated that everything was ready.

Groven then walked to the very front. Neither Murray nor Karon stood up. They remained seated.

Groven did not mind, and simply said, “You will offer your loyalty to the church, to the God of Order. If in the end you cannot return safely, the great God of Order will also receive you and let you merge into the laws of Order. If you return safely and complete the separation of those two, that will be the God of Order’s reward for your loyalty!

“Praise the God of Order!”

Everyone present crossed their arms over their chests and said in unison, “Praise the God of Order!”

Karon could only stand up with Murray and praise god as well.

After the salute ended, Karon and Murray both sat back down again. Three priests walked over to each of the two captains, with one priest on each side carrying a tray.

On the tray before Murray was a yellow lion hair, stiff and sharp like a thorn.

Before Karon was a snake scale.

The lion hair and snake scale were each placed on an astrolabe. As the priests beside them began to chant, light continuously flowed across the astrolabes.

Finally, a priest came and stood behind each of the men. They first apologized to Karon and Murray, then pressed down on their shoulders.

The snake scale was picked up and pressed to Karon’s shoulder. He immediately felt a violent, stabbing pain. It was as if the snake scale was rotting away the flesh beneath it to seep into his body.

An icy chill suddenly swept over him, and Karon instinctively shivered.

This snake scale was wrapped in a layer of arrays, and when it entered his body, it merely found lodging. It did not merge with him.

When Fynethes sensed him, the snake scale inside his body would burst open, first weakening and suppressing his soul, then welcoming Fynethes into his body. It was no different from inviting a spy into himself in advance.

After enduring the initial discomfort, Karon gradually adjusted.

Then he turned his head and looked toward Murray, who was having a long lion hair stabbed into his thigh.

Karon suddenly felt that he was rather lucky.

The token-binding ceremony concluded successfully. Groven picked up two glasses of wine and handed them to Murray and Karon respectively. The other squad members were also served wine by the attendants.

Groven raised his glass and said, “I hope all of you complete the mission and return safely. I mean all of you, because the future of the church needs you!”

***

After the ceremony ended, Karon did not return to his cabin. Instead, he walked alone on the deck. It was deep into the night, and one small boat after another had begun appearing in the mist, figures on each of them.

They were like ghosts, tirelessly rowing through the thick fog. To ordinary people, this scene would be very frightening, but in the eyes of true priests, as long as they were harmless, they were not frightening.

“Hey.”

Karon turned and saw Murray behind him.

“Are you feeling lost?” Murray asked.

“Heh.” Karon laughed. This fellow had actually come to comfort him.

Murray continued, “Do you feel that our future is like the figures on these small boats, with the path home blurred?”

Karon sighed. “Hah. You can just say your feelings openly. There’s no need to use me as an excuse.”

Murray gritted his teeth and lowered his voice. “I originally thought that my hard work could make my grandfather value me. I originally thought that my hard work would eventually let me sense the great God of Order and make Him know that He had such a devout believer.

“I am willing to do anything for my grandfather, and for the great God of Order. I only hope that they can remember that he has a grandson named Murray, and that He has a believer named Murray. I truly did not expect that my final ending would very likely be as a vessel, my name erased, my soul erased, my existence erased, becoming another person’s incarnation.

“Do you know? Last night, I had a dream. I dreamed that when I met our teammates, they all called me ‘Getanbert.’”

Karon teased, “They didn’t add ‘Lord’? How disrespectful!”

Murray was made both angry and amused by Karon’s words, and his emotions instantly lost all tension. “Damn, you really do have a good mindset.”

“Hehehe.” Karon laughed and spread his arms. “Because I am already prepared to welcome the great Lady Fynethes into my body.”

“Really?”

“To have the great Lady Fynethes borrow my body is my honor. I only hope she will be satisfied with it.”

“Do you still have cigarettes?”

“Yes.” Karon handed the cigarette box and lighter to Murray.

He took them, and put one cigarette between his lips before handing another to Karon.

“I quit.”

“Keep me company for one?”

“Is that necessary?”

“Really, I’m begging you. Do you know, when I found out that you had switched places with your squad member, I was actually quite happy.”

“Did I offend you?”

“No. I just felt that being able to face this with you was quite an honor.”

“Feeling better about it now?” Karon reached out and took the cigarette, placing it between his lips. Murray lit it for him.

“More or less. It does feel better, because I admit you’re more outstanding than I am. If even you have to face something like this, then the unwillingness in my heart can lessen a little. Unfortunately, you had one more step than I did. If the person chosen at the start had been one of my squad members...”

“You would have snatched it over like I did?”

“I would probably have comforted him by saying that the great God of Order would be with him.”

“Heh.”

The two men each held a cigarette between their fingers and leaned against the railing. Behind them, small boats of the dead drifted aimlessly across the sea, numb and silent. Somewhere in the heavy fog, a song seemed to be sounding.

Murray said, “The chances we survive while preserving ourselves is only fifteen percent, and that is the most optimistic estimate.”

“Oh, is that so?”

“That’s under the best possible conditions. In reality, once we enter the Reincarnation Gate, how could we, as captains, possibly remain in our best condition?”

“Mhmm, true.”

Murray flicked his cigarette butt directly into the sea, then took out two purple pills the size of soybeans. “These are soul pills my grandfather gave me. They were bestowed upon him by the former High Priest, Lord Rasma. My grandfather’s soul was once injured, but he never took them. Now there are only these two.

“Taking one can form a protective membrane over our souls and help us to resist being assimilated by those two great figures’ souls. In theory, one pill can increase our chance of survival by ten percent.”

“And two?”

“The effect would be better. The chances of survival would rise further.” After saying this, Murray placed one pill into Karon’s breast pocket, and even patted it with his hand.

Karon reached into his pocket, took out the purple pill, held it in front of him, studying it. “This must be very valuable, right?”

“Of course. Why are you asking?”

“How many credits? Give me a friendship discount and I’ll buy it. As long as I can resell it on the black market for a small profit, that’s enough.”

Murray thought Karon was joking. He walked straight toward the cabin, waving a hand behind him. “Not for sale. This is the price for your life.”

Karon pinched the pill between his fingers, watching Murray’s receding back from the corner of his eye, and murmured, “No, this is the price for your life.”