1000x Random Returns: Investing in My Crippled Demon Wives!
Chapter 74: Drinking Them Up Through His Ass?!
Chapter 74: Chapter 74: Drinking Them Up Through His Ass?!
Lucien popped one of the compressed blood candies into his mouth as they moved.
Kael stared. "You actually eat those?"
"They’re blood and I’m a Vampire."
"That’s not an answer."
"It is for me."
Kael made a face. "You’re weird."
"He’s a vampire, so what’s weird with him consuming blood?" Zalor said.
"I know that but it still doesn’t make it less weird."
Lucien ignored them, checking the system message while chewing and using Blood Extraction.
[Ding!]
[Blood of Consumed.]
[Blood Trait Activated.]
[Blood Detected.]
[Race: Crimsonfang Hound.]
[Trait Extraction Beginning...]
[Trait Extraction Successful.]
[Trait Leveled: Predator’s Mark (Uncommon) — Lv.1 → Lv.4]
[Description: Leaves a discreet mana-based mark on a target through physical contact when used, it fades naturally within 2–5 hours. Can be removed early if the marked target notices and possesses greater strength or mana. Detectable via Sanguine Perception or Blood Scent within a 2km radius.]
Lucien’s eyes lit up.
’Tracking, actual tracking, that works even if someone breaks line of sight.’
’Perfect against assassins, fleeing targets, anything trying to hide. Once again my self proclaimed title as every assassins nightmare is being proved and even becoming stronger.’ He thought jokingly while a smile formed on his face.
"Find something good?" Kael asked seeing Lucien smile at nothing.
"Nah, just thought of something funny, also this blood candy has one unique taste, want one?"
"No thank you, do I look like a Vampire?" Kael asked.
"More for me than." He said popping one more into his mouth making Kael look at him weirdly even more.
"Does it really taste that good?"
"Good, no, unique, definitely."
"What’s that supposed to mean?" Kael asked.
"It means it tastes unique." Zalor responded from the side.
They carried on joking and talking as they pressed on, with Rika checking her map and leading them. "The staircase shouldn’t be that far now."
Kael stretched all four arms with a satisfied groan. "Finally."
"Don’t get excited, we still have floor four and five to complete."
"I’m not excited." His stomach growled loudly as everyone looked at him. "...I’m hungry."
"We just ate not long ago." Vex said.
"This is combat hunger, it’s a different thing entirely."
"What’s the difference?" Zalor asked.
"Combat hunger is worse."
"No it isn’t," Lucien said.
"You’re not a warrior, you wouldn’t understand."
"I’m literally fighting next to you, also isn’t Combat hunger being hungry for combat not food?" Lucien asked as Kael pretended no to have heard and chose his right to remain silent.
They ran into a small pack of four hounds about an hour later, and this time nobody needed instructions. Rika’s shield caught the lead hound clean, her axe finishing it before it recovered. Kael used a lower arm to grab a low branch, swinging his whole body around it to bring the greatsword down with extra momentum.
Lucien watched, genuinely impressed. ’He is actually using all four arms intelligently and together now. Progress.’
Kael caught him looking. "What?"
"Nothing."
"Were you impressed by me?"
"...A little."
"I knew it." Kael said grinning.
A second pack ambushed them from three directions about two hours later. Vex’s arrow struck ahead of the flanking group, a mana-thread web spreading between trees that made the hounds hesitate.
"They’re trying to flank," Vex called.
"Left?" Rika asked.
"Three."
"Right," Lucien said.
Vex glanced over. "Two."
"Already saw them."
Vex’s mouth twitched. "Good."
The two of them started calling the field together, Vex marking, Rika engaging, Kael breaking formation at the flank, Zalor striking from shadow, Lucien filling whatever gap opened.
’This is what a real party fight feels like,’ Lucien thought, hooking a hound’s leg and yanking it into Kael’s swing. ’Not five people fighting near each other, but as one unit, it certainly feels nice.’
They crossed paths with two other adventurer parties over the following hours, a C-Rank group cautiously eyeing them from across a clearing before both sides silently agreed to just keep walking, and a second group that offered a friendly nod before heading a different direction entirely.
"Nobody wants to fight anybody down here," Kael observed a little sad.
"Do you want to get beat up so badly?" Vex asked.
"What, no, I’m the one that does the beating." Kael corrected Vex.
"There’s no profit in it," Rika said. "Just injuries for nothing, if they fail."
The third encounter went slightly differently.
A group of five emerged from the red trees, and one of them, a broad-shouldered reddish skinned Oni with an unpleasant grin, sized up their group with obvious interest.
"That’s a beauty, right there" he said, eyes flicking toward Rika before going to her storage ring. "Might be easier to just—"
Zalor materialized directly behind him, dagger resting against his throat before he finished the sentence.
The Oni froze solid.
"You were saying?" Zalor said pleasantly as he drew some blood.
The man’s party immediately started backing away, hands raised, several muttering rapid apologies.
"We were just joking, man, we’re leaving, okay" the Oni managed.
"Good idea," Zalor said and released him.
They vanished into the trees at considerably more than a casual pace.
Kael watched them go while grinning. "Aura farming."
"That’s not what that means," Zalor said.
"You just stood there radiating menace and got instant results. That’s aura farming, if I’ve ever seen one."
"I threatened someone with a dagger pressed to their neck."
"Yes, menacingly."
By the time they reached the third pack of hounds, everyone had settled into a comfortable rhythm, scratches and bruises accumulating but nothing serious, healing potions and pills handling the rest.
"Why do they always bite me, one even went for my rear, luckily Lucien handled it before it got my cheeks." Kael complained, examining a fresh mark on his leg.
"Because you keep putting yourself in front of them," Zalor said.
"That’s called tanking hits."
"It’s called being a target," Rika said.
"Same thing."
"No," Lucien said.
Lucien continued handling the blood himself, raising a hand over each fresh batch of corpses and drawing streams of crimson upward in slow spirals.
"There it is again," Kael said, watching.
"Its still impressive," Zalor admitted.
"Certainly efficient," Vex noted.
"How much can you actually control?" Rika asked, watching the compressed spheres form.
"Depends."
"On?"
"How much blood there is and how much mana I’ve got left."
’It’s not entirely a lie,’ he thought, tucking the candies away.
They finally reached the staircase after several more hours, dense crimson roots parting around ancient stone steps descending into darker light below.
"There," Rika said.
"Finally," Kael breathed.
"You say that every staircase," Vex pointed out.
"Because every staircase is finally the staircase."
"He isn’t wrong there," Zalor said.
Rika raised a hand before anyone could start descending. "We’re resting first."
"Again?"
"Only for thirty minutes, so no sleeping and no stuffing yourself full of meat, Kael. Floor Three’s been harder than the first two combined, so we’re not walking into Four exhausted, since it only gets harder."
Nobody argued with that logic, well besides Kael, denying the meat stuffing part.
While the others settled into a loose perimeter doing their own stuff, Lucien found a quiet spot near the camp, concealed himself and pulled out the remainder of his collected blood candies.
He worked through the candies methodically, each one dissolving with a faint metallic tang as the system processed it.
[Ding!]
[Blood Trait Activated.]
[Blood Detected.]
[Race: Crimsonfang Hound.]
[Trait Leveled: Predator’s Mark (Uncommon) — Lv.4 → Lv.7]
[Trait Acquired: Silent Step (Uncommon) — Lv.6]
[Description: Reduces sound produced by movement.]
’Useful for sneaking,’ he thought.
[Ding!]
[Trait Acquired: Bloodhound’s Trail (Uncommon) — Lv.8]
[Description: Enhances the ability to detect and follow traces of blood over distance.]
’Could be very useful, especially for tracking injured foes.’
[Trait Acquired: One Fang (Rare) — Lv.5]
[Description: Improves coordination and combat synchronization with nearby allies fighting as an organized group.]
Lucien read that one twice.
’Better teamwork,’ he thought. ’Don’t exactly have a pack, though.’
"...Yet." He said as the girls came to mind.
He set the thought aside, unwilling to dwell on it too long, and finished the last few candies before heading back to their campsite gaining a level to almost all the traits.
Back at Blackthorn Estate, the time passed considerably more peacefully.
Evelisse sat glued to the television with Seraphina and Aurelia, her eyes wide open as she stared at the bio monster.
"Wait," she said suddenly.
Seraphina looked over. "What?"
"He just absorbed someone."
"That’s bad?"
"Very bad."
Seraphina leaned in, curious. "How did he absorb them?"
Evelisse paused. "...Don’t ask."
Aurelia’s eyes narrowed. "Why not?"
"He has a very strange method."
"What method?" Seraphina pressed.
Evelisse went slightly pink. "...He drinks them up through his butt."
Silence.
Aurelia turned slowly toward the screen. "...His what?"
"His ass. It’s how he absorbs people to get stronger."
Seraphina covered her mouth, shoulders shaking.
Aurelia’s expression went completely blank. "Why are you watching this?"
"It’s educational."
"How is that educational, unless you are trying to fit something up yours?"
"What? NO! I’m learning battle strategy and aura farming."
Seraphina lost the fight against laughter entirely.
"What," Aurelia asked flatly, "is aura farming."
On screen, a green-skinned alien mentor figure stood motionless in the background while everyone else fought the bio monster.
Evelisse pointed dramatically. "That. He’s aura farming."
"...He’s just standing there, menacingly." Aurelia said.
"Exactly."
"That’s not cultivation."
"You don’t understand modern entertainment."
"You’re supposed to be cultivating right now," Aurelia said.
"I am. I’m studying battle strategy."
"You’re watching a man stand still and another drink through hi bum."
"A very powerful man standing still."
"She has a point," Seraphina said, still recovering.
Aurelia sighed, long and heavy. "Both of you are impossible."
As they argued over what Eve was watching, Aurelia suddenly felt something.
Her gaze drifted toward the darkened treeline beyond the estate’s grounds.
Something had felt wrong out there, more than once now.
She couldn’t say exactly what but she also wouldn’t exit the array, since this was what was protecting them right now.
In the forest, Malrith withdrew his hand from the shimmering barrier surrounding the estate, his expression flat.
He’d spent the better part of an hour probing it, testing weak points, suppressing his own presence, searching for the array’s core.
Nothing happened as the barrier held without a single flaw.
"Epic-rank?" he murmured. "This wasn’t here before."
He activated a communication crystal as Dravik’s voice came through cold and clipped. "What happened."
"The estate’s protected by an array stronger than anticipated. Bypassing it isn’t feasible without drawing significant attention."
A pause.
"Then leave Aurelia," Dravik said finally.
"Leave?"
"She isn’t the priority."
Something sharpened in Dravik’s tone. "Her husband is."
"Lucien."
"Follow him into Bloodmoon Ruins," Dravik said. "Kill him, find out what’s actually responsible for his growth. And if possible," a cold pause "bring it back to me, understand."
"Understood."
The crystal went dark.
Inside the estate, Aurelia’s head turned sharply toward the window.
"Aurelia?" Seraphina asked but she said nothing to them.
’Someone was there, most likely that Malrith.’ she thought her jaw tight.
She choose to not mention it to the others. Not yet.
A few hors later at the Bloodmoon Ruins checkpoint, a Guild official scanned a fresh Guild license against the verification crystal and computer.
BEEP. Green light.
"Rothgar Kesh," the official read aloud. "Half-Vampire. Peak A-Rank."
Malrith inclined his head slightly.
"Entering alone?"
"Yes."
The official didn’t blink. A Peak A-Rank adventurer soloing an A-Rank dungeon wasn’t unheard of.
"Bloodmoon’s currently accepting solo A-Rank entries," he said, handing the card back. "Be careful past Floor Ten."
"I will."
The official had no reason to suspect the man in front of him wasn’t here for the dungeon at all.
Malrith stepped through the portal, and the world folded around him.
He reappeared on Floor One, crimson grass stretching to the horizon, red-tinted sky hanging motionless overhead.
A single Blood Slime noticed him, bouncing closer to attack.
BOING.
He glanced at it. "...C-Rank."
The creature lunged.
He moved without particular effort, and it burst into a splatter of crimson jelly against the grass behind him.
He kept walking, expression unbothered, eyes already fixed on the horizon ahead.
"Lucien," he murmured.
"Where are you?"
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